All Kinds of Trouble
by chickarocka
Summary: Bella is all kinds of trouble and is sent by her mom and stepdad to stay with her dad in Forks. A punishment Bella's willing to just about anything to get out of, including attempt to find even more trouble with a Cullen. AU, all human, occ
1. Chapter 1

**a/n:** this is my first attempt at a fan-fic so pretty please let me know what you think. btw i own nothing twilight, except my team edward keychain.

_BELLA_

This was all kinds of fucked up.

And I knew it wasn't going to get any better soon.

I was laying on the cold tile floor of my living room. Alice with a damp towel to my forehead, and the tall man in blue hovering. I looked around, raised my head slightly- I saw the glass and the blood... My stomach lurched again. The officer asked where my parents were.

Phil picked me up from Vickie's the next afternoon, apologizing and telling her Renee would call her later. His knuckles were white with the force of his grip on the steering wheel, the muscles in his toned arms were taut. The ride home was silent and uncomfortable. But better than the yelling I had been expecting.

The front window of the house was covered with plywood. Phil looked over at me as he pulled into the driveway. His hazel eyes bored into me, he said nothing. He didn't need to, I could feel his anger. I noticed a beer bottle in the rocky landscaping of the front yard, though the red I had seen on the front porch last night was no longer visible. Phil got out of the car, and walked up the walk and I followed wordlessly with my head down.

Thank God for Alice. I don't know how she did it, but things were relatively clean. The glass was gone, as was the blood. I don't think I could have handled that again. Couches were pushed back into place around the coffee table, I had spent much of the night before attempting to dance on. Empty plastic cups and bottles no longer lined the bookshelves. The only tell-tale sign that this house had been the sight of a lot underage drinking the night before, was the guilt on my face and of course the broken front window.

"Your mother is in your room," Phil finally spoke.

I walked through the arched walkway and down the salmon colored hall as I slowly came out of my haze. Things has seriously gone too far. What the fuck was wrong with me? Why the fuck was my mom in my room waiting for me? What the fuck was Phil doing home?

He had a game tonight. And he was here? My mom was spending the long labor day weekend with him in Texas. And she was here? My brain couldn't wrap around any of this. And I sure it wasn't just my wicked hangover.

The door to my room was open, Renee's back was to me. Her dark hair cascading down either side of her face as she bent over something on my bed. She turned walking toward my dresser, closing an empty drawer and opening another. She stacked my pants in her arms, _What the hell! _She glanced over at me before turning back toward the bed. She looked older than she ever had, tired and sad. Under her nose was red and raw, her eyes were ringed in red and puffy, they sparked with the slight tinge of green they always did when she cried. And on my bed was a large almost full duffel bag.

All kinds of fucked up.

She placed the stack of pants in the duffel. Turning back to the dresser.

My breath hitched. She looked over at me again. She was so sad. I dropped my gaze to the floor and sad nothing as Renee opened another drawer.

I knew this was not good, but couldn't find my voice to question what was happening. I looked up at her, my eyes full of panic and confusion. And Renee could read me like an open book. Her eyes met mine.

"We decided something" she spoke softly.

What I wanted to scream, but my mouth couldn't find the words. Though it opened. All that came out was a soft hiss, like a balloon deflating, as my breath escaped me. Renee stared at me for what seemed to be hours before I could manage a slight nod, willing her to go on.

"So," she started slowly, "we think maybe you...." Renee stopped, considering her words.

_What the fuck!!_ I screamed in my head, _What is going on?_ Renee looked into my dark brown eyes, watching as the confusion in them turned to anger. _Who the FUCK is WE!!!_ My mouth opened again, as my ire rose, I had never yelled at my mom, ever, now I was trying to rein myself in.

"The ticket's already been purchased."

More confusion. My head swam. My breaths were coming fast and shallow.

"Your going to stay with your dad for awhile."

I swallowed. I may have swayed. I was dizzy. I lowered myself to the cool Terra Cotta tile. All kinds of fucked up.

"Your leaving in the morning."

"Mom..." I whispered.

"I think I've got everything you'll need packed up for you..."

"You can't..." I could barely hear my own words.

I heard Phil shifting his weight in the hall behind me. Of course he would be there. Making sure Renee didn't falter. I'm guessing that a lot of the "we" Renee had spoke of was really "they". Phil and Charlie.

"I'm sorry..." Renee started.

"Please get out, " I whispered. I wanted to be by myself to fall apart. I knew there was no talking my way out of this. I knew that Phil wasn't' going to leave my mom and me alone to give me a chance. I had fucked up and now I was fucked.

When my mom met Phil, it was great. She was so happy and I loved when she was happy. Of course I was skeptical. I'd seen Renee fall in "love" before. Always too quickly and often it didn't end well. Then I met him, and I thought he was a good guy. Young maybe, I mean he was only 10 years older than me, though when had Renee ever acted her age. He nice though, and he seemed to have his crap together. More together than Renee. And more than the handful of men she'd been involved with that I actually met.

So then the unthinkable happened. Phil moved in with us. It wasn't too bad. Actually at first it was great. Phil could kind of cook, so I wasn't making every meal. He could remember to pay the bills and feed the fish. He could remember where mom had left her keys and he could look at a clock or calendar every once in awhile. I realized how much I'd taken care of Renee, and now I had time to be a kid myself. I focused more on my school work, and I spent more time with my best friend, Alice.

Last summer Phil and I were home while Renee was taking a pottery class. I was prepping dinner in the kitchen when Phil came in and said he wanted to talk. He asked me for my my mom's hand, it was sweet, and of course I said OK. He proposed that night, 2 months later they were married.

That's when things got weird.

Maybe Phil hadn't thought much about being a parent until he married Renee. I mean he was around me, he knew I was Renee's daughter. But what that meant for him was less defined. But it was as if he suddenly felt the need to define his role as "step dad".

To say that Renee's parenting style was lax, probably an understatement. But Phil's... well it was definitely different than my mom's. There were arbitrary rules and expectations, he began to question me endlessly about everything. He was even getting on Alice's nerves. I started spending less time at home. Which brought on more questions and then he grounded me.

That was the tipping point.

I was shopping with Alice, which wasn't on my list of top things to do. I swear sometimes Alice thought I was an overgrown doll. But I'd lost a bet, over how many times my neighbor Jasper could manage to walk past while we were sunning on my porch, well Alice was tanning I was trying not to burn. I don't usually make bets with Alice but boredom had gotten the better of me. By the way the answer was 7, 7 times in 45 minutes.

So shopping was my punishment. I'd told my mom I'd be home around 4:30 to start dinner. It ended up being closer to 6, since we'd ran into some friends at the mall and had dinner with them. It was a Thursday, Phil was usually at the gym late Thursdays and Renee had called to say she'd be at the school late, so I didn't even think about it.

When I got home Phil was livid. I still don't' know why he was home. He went on and on about how he had no idea where I was. _Hello, you could have called my cell phone and asked!_ When I said I'd had dinner with boys from school, I thought his eyes would pop out of his head. I walked away as he was relaying the terms of my grounding and shut my bedroom door in his face.

I know that some of the coaches from his team had teens, they were probably giving him all sorts of advice and warnings. But Phil had known me since I was 14. He had to have some idea as to what type of person I was. I couldn't think of anything I'd done from the time he'd moved in to make him not trust me. I'd been a good student, in several AP classes, I was always home on time. Still he doubted me so greatly. As I sat in my room, behind that closed door I figured if he was going to think the worst, maybe I'd show him what it was like. That probably wasn't the best choice I'd ever made, but it was too late to change things now.

I reached for my phone to call Alice and realized that my phone was gone. They couldn't be fucking serious. I wanted to go grab my cell phone from my purse, but my purse was in the living room and I wasn't going out there. Besides I'm sure that it had been confiscated as well. I thought about sneaking out my bedroom window and walking the six blocks to Alice's but the small blinking light in the corner of my window sill told me the alarm had been activated. Plus, without my cell I wouldn't be able to let her know I was coming, and I wouldn't have made it past the gate.

All kinds of fucked up.

Fingering the heavy ring hanging from the chain around my neck, I curled up on my bed to cry and sleep off my hangover.


	2. Chapter 2

_BELLA_

Goodbyes at the airport were awkward. It was early morning and I had not slept well. Renee was still distraught, and just so sad. It hurt deep in my chest to look her in the eyes, when I did, I couldn't breath. And Phil was still pissed off. He also never gave Renee and I more than a minute alone, probably still afraid she'd change her mind. I knew I'd fucked up, but what the hell did he have to be so angry about, he was getting what he wanted.

The small shuttle plane from Seattle to Port Angeles landed early in the afternoon. Charlie was waiting for me just past the security check point with a grin on his face.

The grin slowly dissolved as I approached him. "Hey Bells," he said softly, seeming to test the waters.

I nodded at him, hoping he'd understand the sign that I wasn't ready to talk. He did, Charlie wasn't much for unnecessary conversation any way.

The ride to Forks was quiet, listening to the low growl of the police cruisers engine, the buzz of the tires on the wet pavement and of course the constant tapping of the rain. I watched as many shades of green muted into one. I might have been awed by the emerald color it blurred into. But, it reminded me of the green flecks in Renee's eyes, and how they amplified when she cried. Which reminded me of how much I'd hurt her. My breathing was strained again.

I knew when we were getting close to Forks. It was an odd feeling, I hadn't been here in almost 3 years. I remembered every turn we took to get to Charlie's, recognized the signs and stores. Nothing seemed to have changed in the small town. Not that I was expecting it to have.

The last few years I'd managed to convince Charlie to take vacations with me, instead of me spending my two weeks visits with him here. I told him we'd get to spend more time together that way, since he wouldn't be distracted by work. But, like my mother, really I just couldn't handle the oppressiveness of Fork's constant cloud cover, rainy weather and small town mindset. He agreed but I'm sure he guessed at the real reasons. A few months earlier he'd come down to Phoenix and stayed with me while Renee traveled with Phil. During their brief time together Charlie and Phil really hit it off. I should have known that was a bad sign.

We pulled into the drive beside the house. Parked on the street in front was an old faded red pick up truck. Well at least it seemed one thing had changed, I didn't recognize the truck.

"That's yours," Charlie said, nodding toward it.

"What?"

"Well your going to need to get to school and back. I bought it off my friend Billy for cheap. It's a little beat up, but it runs great. You remember Billy Black, don't you?"

I shook my head, I didn't.

"Well... Think of it as a homecoming gift."

I flushed red. "Thanks," I stammered out.

"Your welcome, Bells. I'm just happy to have you here," Charlie said softly, shrugging his shoulders. "Let's get your stuff inside."

It took one trip. I hadn't brought much with me. Renee had packed me the duffel and a backpack I carried on. I'd thrown in a couple of my favorite books and my ipod as well. Charlie carried my bag up the stairs for me opening the door to my old room. It like everything else in Forks, looked the same as always. The twin bed was covered with an old quilt, the rocking chair the the corner from my infancy, a dresser, a desk against the wall and a small bookshelf with some of my old books. The yellow paint had faded more.

"Well, I'll let you unpack," Charlie said. "I'm going to head over to the station and make sure everything OK." Just like Charlie, he was the chief of police in Forks and he never stopped working. We both knew that things in Forks were just fine, we'd just driven through half the town. And if there was an emergency Charlie wasn't hard to get a hold of. But I wasn't going to complain about the alone time, I was about ready for another crying jag.

"I'll be back in a few hours Bella. Call the station if you need me."

I knew I wouldn't.

I began unpacking the duffel first, making mental notes of a few things I would need. A raincoat for one and probably boots, I'd probably have to head back to Port Angeles tomorrow to get some things as there were few places in Forks to shop. As I was putting my clothing into the dresser I found a few non-clothing items Renee had put in the bag for me. A framed photo of her, Phil and me from their wedding last September, a couple more pictures of the two of us and a few of Alice and me. There were some rocks from our front yard in a bag, it was so Renee to put to them in there. I was hit by a wave of sadness. Let the crying begin.

Twenty minutes or so later I had managed to calm myself down. I unloaded the books from my carry-on, I found my cell phone in the bottom of the backpack._ Dang it, I'd had it all this time_, I thought, _I could have called Alice when I was in Seattle_.

I'm sure by this time Alice was going crazy, I hadn't spoken to her since I was loaded into the back of the ambulance very early Saturday morning, it was now late Sunday afternoon. I turned on my phone, 12 missed calls, 7 new voice mails and nearly 20 new texts._ Fuck's sakes Alice._

As I was about to check the voice mails my phone rang, Alice. I didn't even have a chance to say hello before she began speaking at the speed of light.

"What the hell Bella, I've been trying to get a hold of you for the last two days. Jasper said he saw Phil bring you home yesterday but hasn't seen you since. Then Phil's truck was gone today, he was worried they went to hide the body. He's has been calling me, figuring that if he tried your house number they wouldn't let you talk to him. He thinks your mad at him, which you should be, are you? And he's freaking out and getting more pissed off every time he calls me. He wanted me to tell you that he's sorry, but I think that's bullshit," I could tell she wasn't going to give me a chance to say anything.

"Alice,"

"I mean come on, he didn't even stick around once he heard the sirens,"

"Alice."

"I can't believe that other motherfucker even tried to touch you, I thought everyone knew that James was fucking crazy. But throwing him.."

"ALICE!" I shouted into the phone. "It doesn't matter, none of it fucking matters. They sent me away."

"What?"

"They sent me away. To Forks. To stay with good ol' Chief Charlie."

"What the hell are you talking about Bella?"

"I'm gone. I'm already in Forks. Got on a plane this morning. I'm unpacking now." I was rethinking the whole unpacking thing. I should have left everything in my bag as a silent protest.

"You can't be gone."

"I am. Trust me. Almost 1200 miles away. In Forks. What the fuck."

"You can't be. You didn't say goodbye."

"They wouldn't let me Alice. They booked the ticket, packed my things, took my phone, then set the alarm, so I couldn't leave." I felt angry tears beginning to sting my eyes.

The line was silent. "Alice?" I heard her soft sob.

"Bella, I'm so sorry this is my fault."

"How the hell is this your fault."

"It was my idea to have the party."

"I could have said no."

"No, you couldn't have. No one can say no to me."

That was true. I smiled. "I miss you already Alice."

"I miss you too. I love you."

"I love you Alice. And I'm not staying here, I'll figure something out."

"School starts Tuesday what am I going to do without you."

Alice and I talked awhile longer. Rehashing the events of Friday evening,much of which I couldn't remember I tended to blackout when I drank. We planned her outfit for the first day of school, talked about mundane things. Pretending that I wasn't so far away.

"You'll have to call him. I won't. I'm not telling him anything."

"I know, you don't have to. I'll handle it"

After talking to Alice I returned to my unpacking. When I went to hang some things in the closet I found a new raincoat hanging. Charlie. He'd really put some thought into this, the truck, the coat. This started before Saturday morning, he'd been planning this for awhile. He had to have.


	3. Chapter 3

_BELLA_

Charlie brought home pizza for dinner, we ate in front of the flat screen while he watched the game. The silence between us probably wouldn't have been awkward, since neither one of us are big talkers, but all I could do was sit and stew. I wondered how I ended up here in Forks. Who's idea this all was and how long this was all being planned.

"So I ran into Mr. Aro today. He's the principal up at the high school. They're expecting us up at the office on Tuesday morning. I'll get you all registered for school. Your mom packed all your, birth certificate and what not for you, right?"

I nodded, I'd seen it all in my backpack. Though I contemplated saying that Renee hadn't wondering if that could help delay me starting school. I doubted it. First off because he'd just call Renee. And secondly, I'm sure that Forks High would let me start without the required paperwork, being the daughter of Forks' Finest.

"Is there anything else you need to get settled Bells? Make a list and we'll go tomorrow and get anything you need. I figured we'd head to the market and get some extra groceries. There's eggs and some cereal here for the morning, but I don't know if I've got stuff that you like."

Now seemed like as good of a time as any to get some answers. "I noticed you got me a raincoat," I stated, though I wasn't sure if it came out sounding more like an accusatory question.

"Yeah, I hope it's OK. Does it fit?"

"I didn't try it on."

"Oh. Well, I figured it was something you'd need. I was up at Newton's Saturday morning for some tackle and thought I'd better. Well, hope it's OK." Charlie trailed off.

_Geez_, this was not Charlie's fault, it was mine. If he'd know I was coming he would have been way more prepared. And here I was being a total fucking bitch. "Yeah, it looked fine. I'll try it on later."

Charlie nodded. "So yeah, anything you need make a list." He turn his attention back to the game.

After we finished eating I took the leftover pizza to the kitchen, and tossed the paper plates we'd eaten off of. Saying goodnight to Charlie I headed up the stairs. I headed into the one bathroom. I brushed my hair out and pulled it into a high ponytail. I brushed my teeth and washed my face, slowly. I was stalling.

I took a deep breath, headed into my room, picked up my cell phone and dialed.

"What the FUCK!!!" growled the voice on the other end.

"Where the fuck are you? I'm sitting outside of your fucking house. No one is fucking here. Where the fuck are you Bella? How come you haven't fucking called me in two fucking days? I've been calling you. You know I don't have to put up with this shit right? Right? I fucking swear to God Bella. Fucking say something. Now."

"I'm not there." I said softly

"Well that's fucking obvious. I've been fucking sitting here most of the fucking day. Which is bull shit, I could find better _things_ to do. Jasper said that that fucker's truck was here yesterday. I thought I'd fucking wait you out, since you didn't feel the need to fucking call me or anything. I fucking said sorry. I said it when I left too, though I'm sure your ass didn't fucking hear it."

"Was I even conscious when you left," my soft tone a sharp contrast to the near yelling on the other end.

"Does it fucking matter. What the fuck are you trying to say? Huh? If you wanna fucking say something Bella by all means, fucking just say it!"

"I'm not saying anything, I was just asking." I sounded like a pouting 5 year old and I knew it. My left hand rubbed over my lower lip, pushing it into my mouth as I bit down lightly. When I realized what I was doing I dropped my hand to my lap quickly, as if he could see me doing it. "I'm sorry."

"No baby, you I know you weren't saying anything," his tone had softened. "I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me the other night. I just fucking lost it. I saw that motherfucker touch you, and no one, NO ONE, fucking touches my girl, Bella. No one, baby."

I couldn't really complain, I loved it when he got all protective. My only wish was that it hadn't involved my mom's picture window. "I know James, I love you."

"I love you too baby. Now, where are you? I'll come get you."

"You can't." My evasiveness was going to set him off again, but couldn't manage a clear to say what was going on.

"Why the fuck not, Bella?" The growl was back, he wasn't yelling, just growling in his low gravely voice. " You're mine, if I..."

"I'm not there." I interrupted him.

"I know your not fucking here, I asked where you were so I could fucking come and get you."

"I'm not in Phoenix."

I heard him suck air through his teeth. I could picture him, his ice blue eyes narrowed and brows low, pulling his shoulder length blond hair back with his free hand. The anger visible in the creases of his face. I was glad Renee and Phil weren't at the house. He exhaled though his mouth, "So, where are you?"

"Washington."

"I thought they were in Texas. Isn't that where you say'd that fucker had to go?"

"They probably are, I'm not them." I paused waiting for James anger to explode again. "I'm in Washington, with my dad."

"What the fuck Bella?" It felt as though he was waiting for me to say something, anything, but I didn't know what to say. After a few moments he continued, his voice rough and low, "Why the fuck didn't you tell me? When did you leave?"

"They took my phone. Left this morning."

"And when are you coming back?"

"I don't know" Then the line went dead. He'd hung up on me. I cried myself to sleep again. In my dreams I was lost, I was cold and wet and couldn't find my way out of the deep green that surrounded me.

Monday was fairly uneventful. Charlie and I went to the market and got groceries. I offered to cook some of the meals when Charlie started tossing a weeks worth of TV dinners in the cart. I was not going to eat like that, I would go back to Phoenix weighing an extra 50 lbs. I'm sure James would not be OK with that. We picked up some toiletries for me as well, I'd borrowed Charlie's toothpaste last night and in the morning. Thankfully they carried my favorite shampoo, only a few stores had carried it in Phoenix.

He took me to the local diner for dinner. I could feel everyone's eyes on me. Everyone knew Charlie, he was the Chief of Police after all, they greeted him as he passed. A few people came to our table to talk to Charlie about one thing or another, most were thinly veiled attempts to find out what I was doing in Forks. It had been years since I'd been there but apparently several members of the community still recognized me. Though Charlie seemed thrilled to introduce me to those who didn't.

It didn't take long for me to lose interest in the conversations Charlie was having, most of them were the same. "Bella's going to be staying with me for a while," he say with a smile. "We don't really have a time frame yet. She'll be starting up at Forks High tomorrow morning."

"Well I'll tell my boys to keep an eye out for her." said the woman standing beside the table now.

The man standing beside her, placed his hand lightly on her shoulder. "I'm not sure if the Chief wants that Esme," he chuckled lightly. I didn't recognize him, as I had several of the visitors to our table. He had fair skin, pale blond hair, his eyes were a misty blue. He smiled widely at my father, then me, his teeth were perfect.

"Isabella," the woman said, "it's wonderful to meet you." She extended her hand to me, her green eyes reminded me of something I couldn't place.

"Bella," I stated softly as I took her hand, shaking it.

"Bella." She nodded, smiling warmly. "I'm Esme, and this is Dr. Cullen," she gestured to the man behind her, who also nodded at me.

"Well Charlie, I'm sure I'll be seeing you. Hopefully not too soon though," Dr Cullen said with a smile and a small laugh. Then he took Esme's hand and lead her towards the door.

Charlie looked back at me, "The Cullen's are good people," he stated. "Moved here a few years ago, he's in charge over at the hospital. But you stay away from their older son, he's trouble."

_Ah, trouble_. Exactly what I was looking for. I smiled lightly.

Other than to the guests visiting our table, Charlie and I didn't talk much as we ate. He ran down the plan for the next day. School had started last week in Forks, which sucked. Tomorrow was the first day back in Phoenix, I groaned inwardly. Not only was I starting at a new school, in a small town where everyone had know each other for years, but they'd also been in school for a week already. Settled in. I was not looking forward to being the new girl. Plus, I wasn't registered yet, so Charlie was going to have to go in with me in the morning and take care of all the paperwork. I was sure it was going to be the worst day of my life to date.

When we got back to Charlie's house, I headed up the stairs. Telling Charlie I'd see him in the morning, bright and early, as he sat down to watch ESPN Tonight. When I got to my room I checked my cell phone, I had purposely left it behind, figuring that the only person who might call I didn't want to talk to. Sure enough there were 3 missed calls from Renee, all with messages, I deleted them without listening to them. I knew that she never would have made the decision to send me away on her own, but some how that logic wasn't helping right now. I texted her that I was "safe and sound in Forks," I couldn't stand the thought of hearing her voice.

Alice had texted me that she missed me already. I called her back we talked for awhile, before I curled up on my bed and dreamed of being lost in the deep green again. My alarm woke me the next morning, I was tangled in my sheets still exhausted.

I showered, and put on a pair of jeans and a blue v-neck shirt. I blew dry my hair, thinking how futile it was as I could hear the constant rain tapping against the window. I left my dark brown hair flowing around my face, looking in the mirror I figured this was as good as it was going to get. My eyes reflected the lousy sleep I'd gotten the few days prior, they were dull brown and dark underneath, which did nothing for my pale skin. Except make me look sickly. I took a deep breath trying to calm myself, I wished I'd stuck with the yoga classes Renee had roped me into a few years ago. Some meditation might do me good right now.

Charlie was waiting for me downstairs, grinning proudly. He'd made breakfast, fried eggs and burnt toast, well he'd tried. There was coffee, the coffee was good and I was going to need it. We headed out the door together. Charlie was still grinning like a fool."Bells go ahead and follow me," he called, heading over to his cruiser.

I was so glad he'd got me my own vehicle, I couldn't imagine having to be driven to school in the police cruiser. I hopped into the old truck for the first time, noting that it was a manual. I smiled lightly to myself, James had taught me to drive stick over the summer. I put it in neutral and turned the key, the engine roared to life. Like a great beast being woken up, The Beast would be a good name for him. I trailed Charlie up the high way and into the school parking lot, The Beast was a little slow to pick up when you hit the gas but all and all he was a pretty smooth ride.

There were only a few cars in the parking lot. I parked toward the back, where I guessed students probably parked, Charlie had pulled into the visitor spot in front of the office. He'd jumped out of the cruiser and was leaning against it waiting with that grin still in place. "Ready Bells?" he asked excitedly. It occurred to me that this was Charlie's first ever time dropping me off at school.

The realization made me feel badly for being so stand-offish and bitchy since I'd arrived. Charlie was happy to have me and thrilled to be doing all the "dad" stuff he'd missed out of most of my childhood. He scratched at his graying temple, before smoothing his mustache. I nodded at him, causing his grin to grow into a smile. The smile created crinkles around his chocolate brown eyes, my eyes. "Let's get in there then."

_Ack_, I was not going to feel badly for Charlie. He was part of this plot against me. He was the enemy and I had to remember that if I was going to get out of here and back to my real life in Phoenix. I had to stick to the plan.

The plan, as it currently stood, was _Bad Bella Makes More Bad_. I was going to find as much trouble as I had in Phoenix, if not more. Renee would see that being with Charlie wasn't making a difference and demand I come home. And no one could argue with that because she had primary custody. I know that "all kinds of fucked up" had got me here, but maybe more "fucked up" would get me back. It wasn't a perfect plan, but it's what I had to go on for now.

Today was day one. The first day I had time away from Charlie, so I planned on scouting out as much trouble as I could.

Smiling back at Charlie, I said, "OK." And we headed up the front steps of the school.


	4. Chapter 4

**EDWARD**

This was my Junior year at Forks High, being that it's not the most prestigious school in the country I was working pretty hard to be sure I'd get into Stanford in two years. And the long Labor Day weekend was allowing me to get a good head start on this school year. I'd managed to get an outline of assignments from several of my teachers and was getting as much early work done as I could. School was my life. I planned on following in my father's ivy league footsteps and would do just about anything to meet my goals.

I was reading from my biology textbook on Monday evening when my parents returned from dinner.

"Where's your brother Edward?" my dad asked.

I shrugged. Emmett was most likely in one of two places, screwing his on-again off-again girlfriend, Rosalie, or drinking with his football buddies. I knew this, my dad knew this, hell, most of Forks knew this. He was after all the star of the Forks football team, everyone in this town knew Emmett and those who weren't cool enough to hang with him avoided him. That included me. Not that he and I didn't get along, I just couldn't risk having a black mark on my record. Being brought home by the local police on an regular basis wasn't something I was interested in.

My dad, Carlisle, headed up to his study to do paperwork for his job at the hospital, while my mom, Esme sat on the couch beside me turning on the TV. My mom was really beautiful, her hair was the color of caramel with light curls, and her eyes were the same deep emerald green as mine. "What are you working on, hon?" she asked, tipping her head towards mine and reading from my book. "Ah, biology. How's it going?"

"Pretty good. I'm probably a good month ahead of schedule on the reading."

"You know Edward, it's OK to take a break once in awhile." It wasn't a question.

"I'll take a break if I need one," I rolled my eyes at her. "It's not like there's a whole lot else to do in this town."

"Oh Edward," she sighed, ruffling my hair. "Well, I guess there is a little excitement now," there was a tinge of excitement in her voice. Like most of the women in this small town, Esme enjoyed a little bit of gossip. She was dropping a line, hoping I'd bite. I would, to please her, and she knew it.

"Hey! Where is everybody?" a loud voice shouted from the back door. Apparently, Emmett was home.

"In here, Emm," Mom called.

"So, the rumor around town is that they'll be a new girl in school tomorrow," Emmett said in his overly loud voice. He had two volumes, loud and louder, his big voice fit his big body. Emmett had dad's mist blue eyes and mom's curls though his hair was a mass of black and he was huge, like a bear. "I guess Chief Swan's daughter just moved in with him."

"I didn't know he had any kids," I said.

"I met her tonight," Esme bubbled, excited to share her knowledge.

Emmett dropped himself into the oversize chair, that really was just the right size for him, that was kitty corner to the couch Esme and I were sitting on. "So, what'd she look like, Mom?" he asked, kicking his feet up on to the coffee table.

"She's a beautiful girl, seemed quiet, polite. Her name is Bella." She was looking at me as she answered Emmett's question.

"Humm..." Emmett pondered, rubbing his chin. "Don't suppose the Chief's gonna let me anywhere near her?"

"I'm sure Rose, would love to hear about that." I taunted.

"Rose and I are over, thing of the past, dear brother. You really should try and keep up. Maybe if you took your nose out of those books every once in awhile and had some fun.."

"My grades would be ask sucky as your's," I finished for him. "I'd be on the verge of NOT graduating. No thanks, dude."

"But at least you'd be having fun," he shrugged.

"Emmett, WILL be graduating this year," my mom stated, eying Emmett.

"Yeah, yeah. Well I'm gonna head up to bed, I'm gonna head to the school early tomorrow to do some lifting. Night, Mom." Emmett stood, leaning down and kiss our mom on top of her head before heading up the stairs.

"He's right, Edward. You could have a little bit of fun."

"Who says I'm not having fun."

The next morning Forks High was a buzz with gossip about the new girl. Jessica Stanley was an aide in the front office 1st period, when she'd arrived at school Chief Swan and his daughter were already in the office with Mr. Aro with the door closed. Apparently, they'd still been in there when the bell rang to signal the end of the period.

Unlike my mother last night, it seemed as though not everyone had nice things to say about her. In particular the girls were being brutal. I guessed there was probably some truth to my mom saying she was "a beautiful girl". Jessica swore she heard Chief Swan say that Bella had been arrested in Phoenix. Kate heard that she'd flunked out of 3 schools. Lauren apparently heard that she was pregnant, and she hadn't been anywhere near the office this morning. Anyone and everyone had something to say about Bella Swan by lunch.

I was late to the cafeteria, since I'd been talking with my Trig teacher about the possibility of tutoring other students as an extracurricular. Now I was anxious to see the new girl for myself. I walked in and looked around, trying to be nonchalant as I headed to the lunch line. I felt Jessica's eyes on me as usual, she'd been trying to get me to notice her since we moved here when I was in 8th grade. Unfortunately for Jessica I had noticed her. I'd noticed that she was a bitch and I wasn't interested, but she didn't get it. I grabbed a bagel and a lemonade and kept looking around for Bella.

I'd never seen her, but I was sure I would be able to spot the "new girl". I checked all the tables that weren't anyone's usual tables, thinking she'd be sitting alone. I was wrong.

Emmett's voice was booming across the room, followed by melodic laughter. My head turned toward the sound.

Esme was right. Bella Swan was a beautiful girl. She was petite, shorter than most of the girls in our class, thin but not unnaturally so. Her face was perfectly heart shaped, with her tiny button nose perfectly centered above her pink full lips. She was very fair almost pale, her skin tone set off by the deep brown of her thick hair that had just the slightest curl to it. I probably stared at her a moment to long. She looked at me then, catching me in the act, but I couldn't tear my eyes away from her.

Suddenly, she turned her attention back to my brother, he was tugging at the ends of her long hair. I closed my eyes and turned my head slightly. When I opened them, I saw Rosalie. Her lips in an ugly sneer staring down the beautiful Bella Swan. Bella didn't seem to notice her.

I sat by myself, across the cafeteria from my brother and Bella. Stealing glances of her whenever I could.

_BELLA_

Today was hell, seriously, my own personal fucking hell. I spent nearly the two periods in the principal's office with Charlie while they chatted about some of their favorite fishing spots before the conversation got back around to me. Charlie was very diplomatic, saying that I'd "hit a rough patch" in Phoenix and we were "hoping that things would smooth out" now that I was in Forks. I had been placed in AP classes my freshman year, but had nearly flunked out by the end of my sophomore year. With the smaller student population there were no honors classes here and they figured I'd be right around grade level. I was finally given a schedule and map of the school. Mr. Aro wished me luck and Charlie and I headed out of the office.

We walked out the only door, which faced the parking lot. It was the middle of second period, yet here was a huge guy climbing out of an equally large Jeep. Somehow he'd managed to find a parking spot right near the front, and he was now bounding directly towards us.

"Mr. Cullen, are you running a little late this morning?" Charlie asked.

"Chief Swan, " the huge boy nodded at Charlie, before shooting a giant grin at me. He had dimples, I melted. "I'm not late. I was here early to workout. I was just taking a little break." Then it clicked _Cullen, hum_, I wondered if this was the troublemaker I was supposed to stay away from. I smiled right back.

Charlie's eyes flashed from the boy, to me, and back again. "Emmett, I think you ought to be heading back to class then," he drawled out slowly.

"Of course, Chief Swan. But maybe she needs a guide," Emmett smiled again and shrugged, cocking his head toward me.

"I think she'll be just fine. And you're missing class."

Emmett's blue eyes landed on me, he smiled wide and the dimples appeared. He winked and shrugged and headed toward the school.

"Isabella Swan, that boy is no good," Charlie said in a low voice. I looked at him and nodded. He sighed, "Well, you better get headed to class. I'll see you this evening." Charlie smiled at me again, the corners of his eyes crinkling, "Have a good day Bells." He tapped me lightly on the shoulder with his fist before climbing into his cruiser.

I nodded waving my hand once as he drove away, flashing his lights once. I smiled to myself as I recalled him doing that when I would visit him as a kid. _Ugh,_ why did he have to want me here so bad. He loved me and only wanted the best for me and would do what ever he could to assure that, but in my mind what was best for me was being in Phoenix. I would have to break his heart, just like Renee had done. It sucked, but there was no way I could stay here.

_OK, enough of the pity party, back to the plan._

I checked my schedule and map, then head towards building B for English.

"So, where you headed?" came a low voice from behind me. I turned to face Emmett Cullen. Emmett was huge, I know that I'm on the short side but this kid was a giant. He was tall and broad, the sleeves of his tee shirt strained against his muscular upper arms. The shirt, also tight across what I could tell was a defined chest, read Forks High Football. _Go figure_. Emmett caught me staring at his chest and the dimples made an appearance again, along with a twinkle in his eyes. He was grinning widely at me, this may be easier than I thought. "I'm Emmett," he said, extending his large hand towards me.

"I'm Bella," I said softly. Glancing up at him through my eyelashes and smiling lightly, as I placed my hand in his. Instead of shaking my hand he grasped it firmly, interlocking our fingers and lowering it to his side. Then he grabbed my schedule from my other hand.

"So, I'm thinking maybe the chief was wrong and you need a little help today. Let's see where we're going to." He then lead me up the stairs into the building, depositing me in front of an open door. The entire class turned at the sound of our footsteps.

Everyone was staring, I took a deep breath, I could feel the heat rising to my face.

"Here you are, Bella," Emmett said, making a show of releasing my hand from his. "I'll see you at lunch," he winked. It wasn't a request.

I smiled and nodded at him, before walking toward the front of the room. I was concentrating hard on not tripping over my own feet and trying not to think of the many pairs of eyes glued on me. I handed the teacher my schedule. He introduced me to the class, told me to have a seat and told Emmett to get to his own class.

The girl beside me in English was eager to show me to my next class and prattle on about who knows what. I wasn't really listening to her, I didn't even catch her name. "So how do you know Emmett Cullen?" she asked.

I shrugged, "I don't really. He just offered to help me find my class."

"Hum," she looked at me out of the corner of her eye, "have you met _anyone_ else yet?" I shook my head, she was getting at something but I had know way of know what. And really right now I didn't care much. She was obnoxious, and constantly talking, mostly about herself. I couldn't stand it, I missed Alice desperately.

At the end of the next class a boy offered to show me to the cafeteria. As soon as we walked in the door I was off my feet. For a moment I thought I'd fell in front of the entire school, which wouldn't have been a lifetime first but it was my first day here. Then I felt the something around my waist, Emmett was crushing me to him. "Thanks for bringing Bella to me Mike," he said loudly.

_Ah Mike_, that was his name. Mike let out a low hiss, I don't think he was planning on taking me to Emmett. I grinned, this might work out well for me. I sat beside Emmett during lunch, laughing too loudly at his jokes. The thin chain around my neck felt especially heavy as I let Emmett wrap his arm around my me.


	5. Chapter 5

**a/n- so this chapter was really hard for me and i'm still not entirely happy with it, but i hope you guys like it. i own nothing.**

_BELLA_

The day was more than half over. So far Emmett wasn't proving to be much "trouble", though he was a little touchy-feely for my tastes. I noticed that several people were noticing the amount of attention that he was giving me and some, like that Mike kid, seemed a little jealous. I thought that might help on the trouble front, even if it was totally bizarre. No one, especially not boys, paid me much attention in Phoenix.

I was OK looking, my skin was too pale, my hair was too unruly, my eyes were too brown and i was probably a whole host of other "too"s. I had been on a few dates, mostly doubles set up by Alice. Alice, on the other hand, was amazing. Her face was kind of angular, but not sharp, her eyes were the oddest green gold mix, a color I have never seen anything to compare to, and she kept her jet black hair super short. She was tiny, she was shorter than me, actually she probably should have been on growth hormones. But really Alice's best feature, was her personality. People were just drawn to her, including me. Like moths to a flame, and the flame, was Alice.

The bell rang, signaling the end of lunch and Emmett stood, ready to lead me to Biology, apparently. He took my hand. "I think I'll be OK on my own," I told him.

"You sure Bella?" I nodded. "OK," he said. I really thought he'd put up more of a fight, especially since Mike Newton was still hovering near by. He dropped my hand. Emmett seemed tense, all of a sudden, his arms were close to his sides and he wasn't really looking at me.

I scanned the room briefly, before heading toward the door, glancing over my shoulder, saying "Bye."

Mike picked up on his opportunity quickly siding up next to me. "Your headed to Bio?" I nodded, "Me too. I'll show you the way." As we stepped out the doorway he started asking me about Phoenix, what I missed, why I'd left. I didn't want to answer. I didn't want to think about what I'd been forced to leave behind, or when or if I'd ever get it back again. As if some sort of gift from the fates, my cell buzzed in my backpack. I quickly pulled it out and found a text from Alice. She always had impeccable timing.

_B. hope ur day is going OK. luv u. call me. *~Alice_

"Yeah, um. Your not really allowed to use cell phones on school grounds." Mike stammered. I'd kind of figured there was some sort of rule about cell phones, but I honestly didn't care. After all my new name was trouble, and I missed Alice. I started dialing.

"Bella!!" came a screech from the other end. "I miss you so much. Today is just sucking without you here. Jasper and I were just saying that. When I pulled into the parking lot, this morning, there was a freshman that fell getting off the bus and it made me think of you. Sorry but it did. I have a free period now, so I thought I'd see how you were doing. Let you know I was thinking of you."

"I've been thinking about you too Alice."

"So how is it?"

"It sucks. Which was pretty much to be expected. But two more classes and I get to go home at least."

"Are you making _friends_?" I could tell she was hoping I wasn't.

"No one who could possibly take your place," I said, smiling into the phone.

"We're here," Mike said gruffly, walking into the door without me.

Alice heard him, "Who's that? A boy? Is he cute?"

I looked Mike up and down, I hadn't really paid much attention to him. His dull blond hair was cut short, he was average height and build, really he was all together average. "Hm, not really my type. Besides," I didn't finish my sentence.

I heard Alice draw in a sharp breath, "Have you talked to him?" Her voice was dark, Alice never said his name, she hated James.

"Not since the other night."

"He's not here today. Maybe he dropped out."

"Alice."

"Sorry."

I looked around, glancing into the classroom I noticed most of the kids were in their seats. "I have to go."

"I call you later."

"OK." I snapped my phone shut and stepped into the open doorway. My foot caught on the threshold, I lurched forward but managed to right myself. At least I didn't fall. I had made it through most of the day without any mishaps, my one stumble would have to be in front of a full house.

"You OK, Bella?" Mike asked from his seat, barely turning his head my direction. I nodded, and continued up to the front of the room paying much more attention now.

I handed my schedule to the teacher at the front of the room, he glanced at me briefly. "Isabella?" he asked distractedly, looking around the room.

"Bella," I corrected.

He nodded at me. "There's a free seat next to Edward." He gestured toward a lab table on his right. I turned spotting the empty seat easily. I looked at the boy at the table, I recognized him, he'd been watching me in the cafeteria.

**EDWARD**

Bella was beautiful and I couldn't help but keep stealing glances at her through out lunch. She sat close to my brother and he put his arm around her several times. She didn't push him away, but she seemed to stiffen at his touch. Emmett was pretty unobservant, I'm sure he didn't notice, because she continued to laugh at his jokes. But I noticed. It seemed that her hand flew up to her chest every time he touched her, and she never once touched him back.

I was really enjoying watching her, there was just something surreal about her. I looked at my watch, less than 5 minutes till the first bell. _Crap_, I was supposed to meet with Mr. Banner about getting some extra work five minutes ago. I stood, taking one last glance at Bella Swan before heading to the door.

"So, even you have noticed the shiny new toy on the playground. Huh, Edward?" came a sweet low voice from behind me.

_Shit_, I did not need this. I sighed deeply, rolling my eyes, before I turned. "Rosalie." There she was in all of her glory, beautiful, blond, tall, thin and obviously quite jealous of the attention being lavished on the new girl. Especially the attention of Emmett. I ran my hand through my hair, Rose put her hand on my shoulder. This was not good.

Rosalie Hale was beautiful, and for all intents and purposes school royalty. Emmett and Rose were typically an item, and when they weren't, I was the only one that she deemed worthy of her attempts to make Emmett jealous. Lucky me. I couldn't stand Rose, she was vapid and shallow, her D average and D cup didn't do it for me. But she didn't care, because typically all she had to do was stand a little to close to me and Emmett saw red. He'd beg her to forgive whatever transgression and that was that.

I'm guessing that Rose, wasn't too fond of Bella. Especially since my brother was currently trying to grope her ass in front of the entire school. So now Rose would be all over me until Emmett saw the light. I let out a deep breath, "I was just going." I started to turn back to the door.

"Not so fast Edward," Rose drawled, tugging lightly on my shirt sleeve.

The bell rang,_ thank God_, saved by the bell. I turned my head towards Rose once more. I saw my brother standing beside Bella across the cafeteria, his eyes were on us. _Shit,_ now I was going to have to deal with him too. Bella was proving to be a pain in my ass and I hadn't even talked to her, yet.

I pulled my arm loose of Rose's grasp and quickly headed to the door. I wasn't quick enough, "Eddie, hold up!" For such a big guy, Emmett could fucking move. I'd made it a few yards from the cafeteria door, I stopped where I was. "Hey bro. Did you catch a look at the new girl yet? Mom was right, she's pretty hot."

I nodded. My mom had not said "hot". My mom had said "beautiful". My mom was right. But I wasn't going to say any of that to my brother.

"So, I, ah, noticed you talking to Rose," he said, jutting his chin out at me and rubbing it as he spoke. I shrugged. "Did she say anything about me?"

I so did not want to be in the middle of their crap again. I closed my eyes, let my breath out of my open mouth as my head rolled back. Then shook my head, "No Em."

He shrugged. "She's jealous. She should be," he smirked as he turned. "See you at home, dude."

_Great,_ Emmett was going to draw this shit out. I pulled at the back of my hair, scratching at my scalp, before attempting to tame my thick reddish hair back down. The drama of Emmett and Rosalie had begun yet again, all over a "shiny new toy". I just hoped for a speedy end to it all, because I didn't have the time or energy to play in their fucking baby games.

I jogged to bio, making it a few minutes before the final bell, but not in enough time to talk with Banner. He'd been waiting for me, I apologized quickly, before taking my seat. Watching as the other students filtered through the door. Mike Newton came in looking pissy, probably because my brother had spent the lunch hour monopolizing the new girl's time. At least he didn't have to deal with the aftermath like me.

Once Mike came through the doorway, I could see her. She'd been standing behind him, just outside the doorway. My eyes once again were drawn to her. Her left hand was rubbing roughly at her chest, and pulling a gold chain that hung from her neck. Her thin fingers would pull the chain out, then drop it, tangle her fingers up in it, rub her chest, then do it again. Pull, drop, tangle, rub. I felt like I was watching something very intimate, but I couldn't stop. Then I realized her mouth was moving, she was talking to someone. I searched her face before noticing her right hand to her ear, she was on the phone.

Looking around me I found that several people's eyes were trained on Bella. Cell phone use was not permitted on school grounds during school hours and I'm sure people were curious to see if Bella would get caught especially since she wasn't even trying to hide. Or if the daughter of the Chief of Police was above school rules. Just then she flipped her phone shut, and shoved it roughly in her pocket. Whoever she was talking to I don't think the conversation ended well, she was distracted and tripped into the room.

Everyone was watching her, a few of the girls giggled. I wanted to growl at them. Mike Newton was sitting right near her and said something to her, but didn't offer to help her. It bothered me. As I sat and watched her continue to the front of the room, I shook my head. Trying to clear my mind. Why the hell would any of this bother me. I'd never met this girl, and she was already making my life difficult. I should hate her, I should have been wishing for her to fall.

There was one empty seat in my biology class, the one next to mine. I ran my fingers anxiously through the front of my hair, as Banner motioned in my direction. I crossed my arms across my chest and closed my eyes, taking a deep breath as Bella turned.

_BELLA_

Edward, the boy at seated at the lab table, had his eyes closed as I approached. His bronze hair was longish and messy, falling in every direction. I slung my backpack down from my shoulder, and pulled out the stool. The noise seemed to bring him out of whatever revelry he was in. He turned to face me as his eyelids fluttered up, revealing a deep green that startled me, I don't know why. I pulled back slightly, taking a sharp breath.

I lowered myself into the stool without taking my gaze from his eyes. _What the hell_. I couldn't pull my eyes from his. There was a buzzing sound in my ears, Heat rose to my face, I wasn't sure if I was breathing or not.

"OK guys, lets get started here." Mr Banner started. His voice caught me off guard and I think Edward too. He seemed to jump slightly, before turning his head to the front of the room. I took a deep breath, shaking my head before I turned my head as well.

**EDWARD**

I'd opened my eyes to find Bella only a few feet away staring right at me. Though I'd spent more time than I cared to admit looking at this girl today, this was the first time I was close to her. Her eyes, which widened when mine met them were big and brown. A deep shade that reminded me of making brownies with my mother as a child. As she lowered her self to the stool next to mine, we were now less than a foot apart. I could smell her, it was intoxicating, floral somehow and strawberries. I felt myself taking deeper and deeper breaths trying to take in more of her scent.

I couldn't pull my eyes away from hers. It was crazy. I thought maybe I wasn't getting enough oxygen to my brain. I felt like a complete moron. I was beginning to feel dizzy and there was a magnetic humming sound. Somewhere, from a great distance away I heard Banner's voice. I battled with myself, my brain telling me to turn my head, but something else telling me not to. My brain won.

I refused to let myself look at her again during the period. But, just the knowledge that she was so close, her scent, the continued hum, made it impossible to focus. It's a damn good thing I was ahead on my reading. When the bell rang I grabbed my things and bolted from the room. I hoped that the fresh air would help clear my mind, which was currently full of visions of Bella Swan. What the hell was wrong with me.

I hurried to Spanish which was on the other end of the campus, thankfully, allowing me to breath freely for as long as possible. By the time I'd reached the classroom the humming in my head had dissipated, though I swear I could still smell her. And every time I closed my eyes I could see her face, her beautiful face.

Before I knew it the bell was ringing. I'd hadn't heard anything the teacher said. Then I found myself heading toward the parking lot, I climbed into my Volvo and sat. I didn't remember anything that had happened on my way to my car, I was on fucking auto-pilot. I sat and I waited. I waited for Bella. I finally spotted her coming from the direction of the gym. She flung herself into an old beater of a truck, which roared to life seconds later and she headed out of the parking lot. I threw my head back against the headrest, and ran both hands through my hair, grabbing fist fulls of it as I reached the back.

My head was again at war with that other part of me. That part of me wanted to follow Bella home.

**a/n Ok like i said this was really hard for me to write, and edward totally didn't behave like i had expected so it threw off the outline i had. i've got the next chapter pretty much done it will be posted by next friday at the latest. please, please, please review. bad or good let me know what you think :-)**


	6. Chapter 6

BELLA

When I climbed into the cab of my truck after school I was relieved the day was over, but I still had a feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach. As much as I missed Alice, I wasn't looking forward to calling her back. I knew she'd want to talk about James, and I didn't want to. Not with her. I turned the key and the engine roared back to life. The noise was kind of comforting, almost blocking the sound of my thoughts. Almost.

I stopped at the gas station before heading to Charlie's house. I needed a cigarette, and was crossing my fingers that they would sell them to me. Before getting out of the truck I fished my phone out of my backpack. I was planning on sticking it in my pocket, but without thinking, I flipped it open and started dialing. I heard it ring once. "Hang up now," I said to myself under my breath. I didn't, three more rings and it went to voice mail. His low voice gravelly was in my ear, telling me to leave a message. I didn't do that either.

I flipped my phone shut, tossing it on the seat beside me and closed my eyes letting the sound of his voice wash through me. I breathed deeply. His voice could only be described as sexy, heat rushed through my body, I rocked my hips forward slightly and felt a blush rise to my cheeks. He always had this kind of effect on my body. My mind however was racing, _Why hadn't he answered? _

I closed my eyes and tried to fight back the blush in my cheeks, it wasn't going to help me look old enough to not be asked for ID. I'm not sure how long I was sitting there, parked in front of the gas station mini mart, before there was a tapping on my window. I opened my eyes slowly, hoping that when I opened them I'd be greeted with bight sunlight and heat, rather than rain and gray. No such luck. Without lifting my head from the seat back I turned my head toward the diver side window.

What I found were dimples. Dimples, a big grin and cool blue eyes. Not exactly what I was looking for but it would do. I smiled back as leaned forward to roll down the window. "Hi Emmett."

"Hey Bella. What are you doing here?"

"Trying to get some cigarettes. Do you think he'll sell me some?" I asked pointing into the guy behind the counter inside.

"You smoke Bella?" he was trying to sound nonchalant but I heard a little shock mixed in there too.

I smirked at him and batted my eyelashes a little, sure that I was looking pretty foolish. "I'm heading in to get some snacks before practice, I could get your smokes. If you want?"

I leaned forward so I could reach around to my back pocket and pull out the money Charlie had given me yesterday for gas. Emmett saw the cash in my hand, "Nah, Bella, I got it. What do you want?"

"Marlboro Lights. Please." I smiled.

"Be right back." Emmett turned and headed into the mini mart.

"Cornnuts!" I yelled after him.

He turned with a perplexed look on his face, "Huh?" I shook my head at him, then waved him back toward the store.

A few minutes later Emmett was back, he pulled my cigarettes from the white plastic sack in his hand. "I grabbed you book of matches," he said rummaging around in the bag. "And these?" Emmett handed me a bag of Cornnuts.

I laughed, "That was a joke. You've obviously never seen _Heathers_." He looked at me cluelessly shaking his head slowly. I opened the pack of cigarettes and pulled one out. "It's a fucking classic, Winona Ryder, and Christian Slater, you should watch it sometime."

A grin spread across his face, and his eyes lit up, "How 'bout you watch it with me?" Emmett raised his eyebrows at me.

I wanted to say yes. I wanted to because Charlie didn't want me around Emmett. I wanted to because I wanted out of Forks. I wanted to because there was nothing better to do. I lit my cigarette with one of the matches, cause I didn't have a lighter those were all back in Phoenix. Then I took a long drag. "We'll see," I shrugged, starting up my engine. I didn't because in my heart I was still James'. "Thanks for the cigarettes," I called over my engine as I threw my truck into reverse. Emmett reluctantly stepped back as pulled out of my parking spot.

"You know those will kill you?" he called to me. I waved and drove off.

My phone started to ring just before I pulled onto Charlie's street. I took the final drag off my cigarette and ground it out in the ashtray, before searching my the seat for my phone. It was Alice. I opened it, "Hey."

"Hi Bella. How did the rest of your day go? Mine was OK. You know things just aren't the same without you around. I made Jasper let me drive him home so that I wasn't alone. You know how I hate to drive home alone. You just never know, you know." I swear Alice could carry on a conversation with a rock without a lull. "So how'd it go Bells?"

"It was OK." I pulled out another cigarette, and lit it. "Nothing monumental."

"You want to ask, so just ask and get it over with. Then we can talk about him."

"You don't know that."

"Yeah, I do."

I took deep drag and blew it out slowly, "So?"

"That's not asking."

"Come on Alice."

"No, Bella. If you want to know, you have to ask."

"This is bull shit. You started this." Alice said nothing. "Fine, did James show up at school?"

"No." I didn't respond, I took another drag off my cigarette and waited for the worms to start crawling out of the can I'd just opened. "You still haven't talked to him I guess."

I shook my head, even though she couldn't see it. "I tried calling this afternoon, got his voice mail." I continued puffing away at my cigarette, nearing the end of it. "He hasn't called you?"

"No Bella."

I closed my eyes and felt a stinging in my eyes as tears began to build. "Where do think he is?"

"How the hell should I know Bella? Why should I care?" Alice was getting louder."Why should you care?" I pictured her with her little hands balled in fists as she shouted into the phone. "Bella I love you, and I miss you terribly, but maybe this move is a good thing."

As tears started to run from the corners of my eyes, I ground out my cigarette and lit another one. Living here was going to turn me into a chain smoker. "Alice?" I said softly.

"No Bella. He's all wrong for you. I can't stand to see you hurt and he hurts you Bella. He hurts you," I could tell Alice was starting to cry as well. Her voice became soft, "And now he can't. That's a good thing Bella."

I couldn't respond. These were things Alice, who I thought told me everything, had never said to me before. Alice always tried to look out for me, ever since we met. She'd been my protector, my defender, what ever it took. In kindergarten little Alice punched a 1st grader in the face who laughed at me when I fell. In 6th grade she'd started rumors about the everyone who ever said anything about me, and her rumors were way worse than theirs. And after Renee's marriage to Phil she never hesitated to jump in and defuse a situation between Phil and I. Alice would do keep me safe and I would do anything to make her happy. Except stay away from James.

-

The October after Renee and Phil had married, Alice and I, well mostly Alice, had been invited to a party at some kid named Riley's. A party wasn't a party unless Alice was there. But Alice didn't want to go, at all, said she just had a bad feeling. Alice always followed her feelings, and I always did what Alice wanted. We decided to have a movie marathon at my house, but Riley heard we weren't coming and called me. Hoping that I could change Alice's mind, he didn't know Alice very well. When the phone rang, Phil answered the phone.

Once I got off the phone, the third degree began. Who was this boy? How did he get our home number? Why is he calling you? Is there drinking at this "party"? Are his parents home? Are you having sex? _What the hell!_ Seriously, he asked me that. Phil was seriously slipping. Even with Alice interjecting that she also had talked to Riley, and saying that we weren't going to any party, he kept going. Did we need to talk with my mom about getting me on birth control? It was too much. I yelled at him to mind his own damn business, before grabbing Alice's hand and heading for the door.

"Tell my mom I'll be home by midnight."

"Bella wait, I was just..."

"I'll be back later. I've got my phone." I shut the door behind me. We walked out to the sidewalk in front of my house and I sat down. "I don't know why I let him get me so much."

"He was kinda out of line with that birth control stuff."

"I know right. Still."

"Well, what are we going to do now?" Alice asked.

I shrugged, "I guess we'll go to that party."

"Bella, I really don't think we should. I just don't have a good feeling about it"

"Well what do you wanna do? I'm not going back in there."

"I don't know, we could go to the movies."

"How are we gonna get there, Alice? Neither of us has a license or a car."

"I've got a learners permit."

"Alice don't be ridiculous." I smiled, "I bet Jaspers going to that party."

Her eyes sparked. That had done it. Alice had a crush on Jasper since he'd moved in next door to me when he was 10 and Alice and I were 9. She always said they were meant to be together and she'd write Alice Whitlock on the inside covers of her binders. Alice could be completely ridiculous sometimes. And she would do just about anything to get Jasper's attention. Including jump out in front of his moving car, which she did that night. He was pulling out of his driveway, he gave us a ride to Riley's.

When we got there Jasper got us cups filled with vodka and Sprite. I hated vodka, it burned and left a dirty taste in your mouth and the bubbles from the Sprite brought the taste up into your nose. It was bad. But I gulped it down quickly, quicker than Alice and went in search of another. And I found one and James in the same place.

"Hey come'er." I turned my head, and he smiled at me. He was sitting at the kitchen table holding a bottle of tequila, twirling it on one of it's square corners. I recognized the guy he was sitting with from my Spanish class, but not him. "Come on," he kicked the chair next to him a little and curled his finger at me, motioning me over.

I thought for sure this was a joke, boys didn't pay attention to me. Especially not boys like this. He was absolutely gorgeous. With ice blue eyes that just bored through you and dirty blond hair that stopped just above his shoulders. His lips, the lips that the low voice that sent tingles though me had come from, looked soft and pink. I stared at his mouth, he licked his lips. Pink tongue smoothing over pink lips, it caused pink to rise to my cheeks. He smirked at me. "I don't bite. Unless you want me to." I smiled at him. "Now come sit down." I did, he draped his arm over the back of my chair and leaned toward me. "You smell good." The heat rose to my cheeks again, as well as other parts of my body.

He poured a shot, raised his eyebrows and pushed the glass toward me. I lost track of how many shots I did that night. I lost track of a lot that night. I have no idea when or how I got home. What I do know is I felt shitty the next morning, when my phone woke me up. I didn't recognize the number, but answered anyway. "Hello," I said rough and groggy.

"Hey baby, how you feeling?" I knew his voice immediately.

-

I inhaled sharply. "Alice." I gently fingered the chain around my neck, tracing it down to the ring suspended on it, around the ring then back up the other side, over and over again.

"He makes you not you, Bella. And I miss you. I missed you before you even left."

"I love him Alice."

"I know. That's why I never said anything. But now your apart from him and maybe now you can see things a little more, clearly? I mean, just think about it Bella. Please for me. He's not good for you. He never was. I'm sorry to say this to you but, I love you too. Don't you love me."

"You know I do Alice. That's not fair"

"It's not. Just think about it. Please."

I'd finished yet another cigarette. "Alice I'm going to go."

"Please Bella, just think about what I said. I love you. I only want you to be happy. And I really don't think you have been."

"Alice I'll call you tomorrow."

"OK, I love you Bella."

"I love you too Alice. Bye"

After I hung up I sat in my truck and had another cigarette. The Beast was a pretty peaceful place to be. I took my phone in my hand and flipped it open, then closed, open, closed, open. I was debating trying to call James again, but he hadn't answered my last call and he hadn't called back. The subtle tapping of rain on the hood of the truck had turned into a loud pinging. Looking up from my phone I realized it was pouring now. Like the sky had opened up and was trying to wash everything clean. _I should get out there, I could use a good washing. _There was a flash of light behind me, checking the rear view mirror I found it was Charlie coming home from work.

"Bella," came his yell as he climbed out of his cruiser. I opened the door of my truck and climbed out as well heading for the house. "Did you just get here?" Charlie asked as he opened the door.

"No."

"Was school OK?"

"I guess."

"Were you smoking out there?"

I shrugged, "Yeah."

"Well, thanks for not doing that in the house. You want me to find something for dinner?"

"I said I'd do it."

"Well if you need any help.." he trailed off as he headed toward the living room. He dropped himself to the couch, propping his feet on the coffee table and turning on ESPN. I headed into the kitchen to fix dinner. Well at least Charlie wasn't pushy and prying, maybe this wouldn't be too bad.

"Hey, Bells." he shouted from the other room. "Where'd you get the cigarettes from?"

Maybe I was wrong. I smiled, and said in my sweetest voice, "Emmett Cullen bought them for me."

"Hrump."

I finished cooking and Charlie joined me at the kitchen table. We ate in relative silence, but it wasn't uncomfortable. Charlie told me that he planned on going in to work early in the morning, to make up for his late arrival today. After eating I cleared the table and did the few dishes, then headed up stairs. I threw myself across the bed and buried my head in the pillow.

My phone rang. I jumped up scrambling across the room to grab it, sure that it was James calling me back. Instead it was Renee. I held the phone in my hand as it rang again, then flopped back on the bed and dropped the phone. I still wasn't ready to talk to her yet, though I wasn't sure how much longer I could put it off. When the phone stopped ringing, I checked my missed calls. She'd called 2 other times that I missed while I was working on dinner. I buried my head back into the pillow. Twenty minutes later Renee called again, I turned my phone off, grabbed my coat and headed back out to the truck for another smoke.

**EDWARD**

My mom was busy in the kitchen and my dad was still at work, when Emmett arrived home from practice. I was set up in my usual homework "bunker",sitting on the floor, my laptop and school books strewn across the coffee table as I copied my notes into files on my computer. He kicked his huge feet up on to the coffee table knocking my biology text to the floor.

"Sorry, bro," he said picking the book up and tossing it back onto the table. I acknowledged him with a sight head nod, continuing with my typing. "So, did you meet Bella?"

"She sits beside me in bio."

"Huh. What'd ya think? Pretty fucking hot, huh?"

"I didn't really pay much attention," I lied.

"Don't know how you could ignore that. I bet Rose has her fucking panties in a knot. A pretty girl drawing attention from her." Emmett had a shit eating grin on his face, this was a fucking game to him. I was pissed, this poor beautiful girl was going to get hurt because my brother needed some excitement in his life. I glared at the computer screen. "I think Chief Swan's gonna have his hands full with that one."

"Why do you say that?" Emmett had something he wanted to say, he was laying the bait. He learned this game from Esme. Whenever she had something interesting, some juicy tidbit of gossip, she lay line after line till someone would ask. It made it more fun for her, knowing that you wanted to know what she know. Emmett did the same thing. The two of them would drive me crazy. It was easier to just ask and get it over with, cause they would go on for hours if you did bite.

"Well she was hanging out with me today. I'm sure you noticed at lunch?" I shrugged. " Even with the chief warning her not to I'm sure. You should have seen the look he gave me this morning when I ran into them. And then I ran into her again after school at the mini mart, I bought her a pack of cigarettes." Emmett's shit eating grin seemed to get bigger.

"Hmm"

Emmett shrugged, "I just didn't think she seemed the type. You know?"

"You just met her how would you know if she seemed any type?"

He shrugged again. "I've probably talked to her more than you. That might give me a little insight."

"Whatever."

"What the fuck is your problem, dude."

"Nothing. I'm just trying to study and your interrupting me."

"Alright then." Emmett stood up and headed toward the kitchen. Then he stopped and came back standing near me. "Hey," he said in a low voice leaning down toward me, "I'm having a party this weekend. Dad's got some conference next week in San Fransisco and Mom thought it'd be fun for her to get out of town. So they're gonna leave Friday and spend the weekend there, Mom will come back Monday though. So party on Friday, and probably Saturday too." Emmett was smiling widely.

I sighed, _great_. This meant that most of Forks High would be drunk in my house for the weekend. The weird thing is that I'm pretty sure my parents knew this, but they'd still go out town a few times a year leaving us to our own devices. I swear Esme would lock up some of her knickknacks before she would go. "Whatever." I was planning to spend most of the weekend studying anyway, I'd just stay in my room. It had a lock on the door for a reason.

Emmett grinned, "I'll have to get Bella to come. How much will that piss Rose off."

I wanted to punch him in the face.

**a/n - so i think i probably dated myself with the heathers reference, but it's a damn good movie. thanks to those who have added me to your favorites or alerts, i'm guess that means i'm doing ok. please review!**

**i own nothing but my team edward keychain!**


	7. Chapter 7

**a/n- sorry this took so long, i had it done but was working on the next chapter and didn't want to post till i got it done, and my life has been busy with all sorts of end of the year stuff. let's see if it gets less crazy now that school is out :)**

**please review! ;) **

**i don't own anything :(**

**EDWARD**

I got to school early on Wednesday so I could talk to Mr. Banner, pulling into the parking lot before most of the student population. I parked way at the back of the lot like always, it made it easier to get out of the lot at the end of the day and I loved my car and didn't want it too close to some of these kids. My parents had given me my Volvo for my 16th birthday.

Banner suggested I sign up to tutor other students, he told me I could use it as extra credit and it would look good on my college applications. He was putting together a tutoring program this year, I had to go up to the office and sign up, listing the classes I could help with, and he'd pair me with a student who needed help. The bonus was that I could work it around my schedule which was great because cross country season was starting up. When I left the classroom I still had some time till first period so I went up to the office, to sign up like Banner told me to.

As I passed the parking lot, I found myself scanning it, looking for faded red. _Ugh_. I wanted to kick myself. I was looking for Bella's truck, I didn't see it though. Between classes I found myself searching the crowds for Bella. Any glimpse of Bella's hair, Bella's eyes, Bella's face. I was making myself sick. Especially since I kept reminding myself that she'd be sitting beside me in biology, and I was counting down till that time. I was disgusting. I hadn't spoken to her at all, I knew nothing about her. For all I knew she was a fucking ax murderer. OK that wasn't really all that likely but, really I didn't know this girl from Eve. She could be just like every other girl at Forks High though, but I couldn't bring myself to believe that.

At lunch I still hadn't spotted Bella. Though really I shouldn't have been to surprised, I hadn't seen her yesterday before lunch either. I got to the cafeteria earlier today, picking an empty table nearer to where Emmett usually sat. Thinking that he'd some how manage to get Bella to sit with him again, all part of his fucked up game with Rose.

Emmett came in a few minutes later with a tray filled with food and sat down at his table with a few of his jock buddies. Rosalie found her way to me, unfortunately. She slided into the seat next to me, placing her diet coke on the table. "Hey Eddie."

"Don't fucking call me that." I couldn't fucking stand being called Eddie, the only people I tolerated it from were family.

"Oh, come on."

"What do you want Rose?" I asked taking a bite of my pizza.

"I just thought you could use some company," Rosalie said, trailing her manicured nail down my arm.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Emmett watching us, I 'm sure Rosalie was also watching him. "Actually Rose, I was quite content on my own." I reached up and ran my hand through my hair, when I placed my hand back on the table Rosalie grabbed it. I'm sure Emmett saw that too, because he suddenly stood up and headed for the door. I shook my hand loose from Rosalie's while she grinned, it was sickening.

I looked to where Emmett had been sitting and realized, Bella wasn't there.

_BELLA_

I woke up about 9, _big oops on my part,_ I didn't set my alarm and knew that Charlie had to be out the door early. I got up, showered and headed out to the Beast. It was gray again and drizzly, it was worse than the rain. Drizzle felt heavy and thick, while rain was cleansing. I pulled my pack of cigarettes out of the glove box and lit one, then jammed my key into the ignition. Taking a drag from my cigarette, I threw my head back against the seat and closed my eyes. I turned on the radio and continued to smoke.

I was on my third cigarette when my cell phone went off. "Hey," I answered.

"So, Bells, are you planning on going to school today?"

"They called you huh?"

"Yep."

"Are you the truancy officer?"

"If I need to be. So?"

"I overslept. I'm on my way now."

"Alright," Charlie said. "You've got 10 minutes to check into the office, before one of my deputies starts looking for you."

_Talk about abuse of power_. I shook my head, this was fucking stupid. "I'm in my truck I'll be there."

"Bye Bells, have a good day," he said, his voice overly bright.

I hung up. Shaking my head again I fired up the Beast, lit cigarette number 4 and head out. I was going to have to get someone to buy me more cigarettes, more than one pack this time. At the school the parking lot was pretty much full, I backed into the first spot I saw, way at the back of the lot. Then I checked in at the office like Charlie had told me to, the secretary smiled way too much. She obviously though this shit was funny.

"Your supposed to come back after your last class and pick up work for the classes you missed this morning," she said, grinning cheerfully.

_Fucking bull shit._

I sighed and nodded once, turning on my heel and walking out the door. I walked into my English class about five minutes late, at least this was the last class before lunch. I slunk into a seat near the back of the room, barely acknowledging the snide greeting from the teacher. I spent the rest of the hour fuming, and desperate for a cigarette. I had to admit, Charlie was good. The score currently was Bella 0, Charlie 2. I had to give him a point for not jumping all over my ass about the smoking too.

When the bell finally rang I jumped up and bolted for the door.

"Hey! Hey, Bella." Mike shouted out behind me.

I slowed slightly, looking over my shoulder at him, but kept heading toward my truck. "Yeah?"

"Where you going?" he was jogging in order to catch up.

"Nowhere," I said as I reached my truck. I unlocked the door and leaned in over the seat, plucking my cigarettes from the glove box. As I straighted out I caught Mike's eyes on my ass, he looked up slowly. When he realized he'd been caught he quickly looked up at the sky. I lit my cigarette. "Mike how old are you?"

"17."

"Damn."

"Bella, I don't think you can smoke here. I mean we're on school grounds."

I rolled my eyes at him, Mike was a fucking pussy and I was fighting the urge to tell him that. But figured now wasn't the time to be pissing people off that I might be able to use down the road. "Hm." I leaned against the side of the truck as Mike stood awkwardly nearby. His eyes kept darting back and forth, and he was stiff. "You don't have to stay out here."

"No. It's OK. I mean how much trouble could you get into? You are the police chief's daughter."

I snorted, "How much trouble is there to get into?"

"Are you hungry Bella?" Mike asked as I finished up my cigarette. "We could head into the cafeteria and get something to eat."

"Nope, I 'm good. Had a late breakfast." I pulled out another cigarette and put it between my lips, though I didn't light it yet. "If you need to go get something though, go ahead, I'll be fine. I'm just gonna hang out here. It's actually not raining. Now if the sun would just shine." I dropped my head back leaning it against my truck and looking up at the sky. I pulled mindlessly at the chain around my neck.

"What's that Bella?"

"Huh?" The unlit cigarette fell from my mouth, I barely caught it with my other hand. Mike had caught me off guard. I lifted my head, and he motioned at hand. "Oh. It's nothing," I quickly dropped the chain. I felt it's weight as it hit my chest. I looked at Mike, his eyes were still on the bottom of the chain. I grabbed the gold ring hanging from it and lifted it, dropping it down the front of my shirt. The cold metal touched my skin, I inhaled sharply as it hit just between my breasts. Mike raised an eyebrow at me, but said nothing. I fiddled with the cigarette in my hand.

"Bella," came a shout from across the parking lot. Mike's face dropped as we looked and saw Emmett bounding toward us. I caught Mike's eye and smiled at him genuinely. I appreciated that he had pushed his questioning, and wanted him to know that. He smiled back before Emmett made it to us. "What the hell are you doing out here?" I waved my cigarette at him. "Ah."

I shrugged as I lit it.

"Ah, I'm gonna go grab something to eat," Mike said. "I'll see you in bio Bella?"

"I'd guess so. I'm sure Good Ol' Chief Charlie will have one of his deputies on my ass if I'm not." I pointed toward the main office with my cigarette, "These fuckers called him this morning when I wasn't in class."

"Yeah that's pretty much standard procedure around here. If you miss more than one class they call your parents," Mike explained.

"That's fucked up."

He shrugged. "Well, I'll see you later," Mike said as he turned and walked back toward the school.

"Man, Bella. You've been here less than a week and you've already got the fuzz on your tail, huh?" Emmett joked.

I smiled. "Why the hell do you think I'm here, Emmett?"

"Huh, I guess I hadn't thought about that. Why are you here?"

"I'm not gonna get into that, Emmett. It's a long fucked up story." Shaking my head, I tried to smile, but I'm sure it didn't reach my eyes. "Hey Emmett, if I gave you some cash do you think you could pick me up a few more packs of cigarettes and a lighter? I could just get them from you tomorrow."

"Um. Sure, Bella. I guess." Emmett was had a strange look on his face as he eyed me up and down.

"I don't usually smoke this much," for some reason I felt the need to defend myself. "This whole move was pretty stressful." I leaned my head back against the truck again, and laughed quietly, _pretty stressful_, that was the understatement of the year, if not the decade.

"What?"

"Nothing. I was just thinking." Neither one of us said anything for a moment. "So, Emmett, why does have a been warned about hanging out with you?"

Emmett tensed up, "Warned by who?"

"Good Ol' Chief Charlie."

He relaxed a bit,"Oh."

"Why who should have warned me?"

"I don't know."

"Emmett you totally got bent out of shape when I asked you that."

"No I didn't."

"Yeah. You did." Emmett shrugged. "What gives?"

"My girlfriend."

"You have a girlfriend," he shrugged again, "and here you are busy monopolizing all my time," I said smiling at him. "I could have been spending quality time with an available boy instead I'm hanging here with you."

"I bought you cigarettes."

"Oh that's right. All is forgiven. So what's the deal?"

"Ah, Rose got pissed at me. I think 'cause I couldn't drive her to go shopping last weekend 'cause I had football practice. So she told me that our _relationship_ wasn't important enough to me."

"So you thought you'd hang all over the new girl to make her jealous?"

"Well, she always does it to me. She starts hanging all over my little brother."

"This isn't a first."

"Nah, Rose and I breakup at least twice a year."

I laughed, "How long have you guys been dating?"

"Since freshman year."

"Emmett, don't take this the wrong way but, you're kinda fucked up in the head." Emmett laughed loudly. I wanted to add that his girlfriend sounded like a total bitch, but I didn't. "She flirts with your fucking brother?" I said softly, shaking my head, he nodded.

"Are you pissed."

"No. I mean really I'm only hanging out with you 'cause Charlie told me not to."

"Really?" I nodded. After a brief second Emmett's face lit up into a dimple inducing grin, "We should totally hang out more." I looked at him. "Seriously, Rose fucking hates that I sat with you at lunch, and Chief Charlie doesn't want you around me. It's perfect."

"Hm," really I didn't mind this plan. I wasn't entirely sure as to how mixed up I wanted to get in Emmett's fucked up relationship, especially not being sure what kind of a crazy bitch this Rose girl was. But, I liked hanging out with Emmett, he was nice, kinda goofy, really easy to be around. Part of me kinda wondered if Charlie really had an issue with him or if he had set this whole thing up. I wouldn't put it past him to use reverse psychology to get me to hang out with someone he really approved of. He just might be sneaky like that.

"Come on, Bella. You know you wanna be my friend," Emmett smiled. "I'm fun. I throw the best parties. I'm having one this weekend actually, and your gonna come."

"Party, huh?"

"Yep, my folks are out of town."

I grinned and looked up at him through my eyelashes, "Hm, I'll think about it. 'Kay?"

Emmett laughed, "What the hell else are you going to do?"

"Good point. Though really I'll have to see if Good Ol' Chief Charlie will let me out of the house."

"He wouldn't?"

"Who the hell knows. He did threaten to sick his deputies on me today if I didn't get to school." Emmett laughed loudly. "Glad you find it amusing."

Emmett and I talked for awhile longer till the bell rang. "Let's go Bella. We don't want the cops showing up cause you were late to class. Might take them away from a real Forks emergency," he said picking me up and tossing me over his shoulder. "Where're we headed?"

"Biology. But really Emmett, I can walk there."

"This is faster," Emmett said.

He'd picked up his pace to a brisk jog, my head was bouncing everywhere. "Emmett, put me down," I shouted, Emmett laughed. I swear I could feel my brain hitting one side of my skull and then the other, as the ground would get closer and further, closer, further. I tried closing my eyes, too late, my stomach was in a knot. "Seriously Emmett."

Then he stopped. He flung me down, setting me on my feet. Well, he tried to put me on my feet. My knees buckled underneath me I was falling backward. "Oh shit," Emmett shouted trying to grab around my waist. Suddenly I stopped falling, Emmett's hands were still outstretched toward me but I knew I hadn't hit the ground. I was confused and dizzy, I felt something firm under my arms. "Good catch Eddie."

"What the hell?" I mumbled.

**EDWARD**

Once Emmett had left the cafeteria Rosalie was quick to depart from the seat beside me. I was glad to be rid of her. I ran my hand through the front of my hair and scanned the cafeteria. Bella was nowhere in sight.

When the bell rang I headed toward biology, I was almost to the classroom door when I heard Emmett's laugh. Someone was yelling at him, I turned. Emmett was coming toward me, the yelling was coming from the girl he had slung over his shoulder. _Good God_. It had to be Bella, why else would he be in this part of the school. Bella was yelling at Emmett to put him down and he seemed to think she was a joking, but the tone in her voice told me she wasn't. Just like Emmett to not know the difference.

He stopped a few feet away from me, and tossed Bella back to the ground. I'm pretty sure he was trying to set her down, but I'm guessing Bella gets motion sickness, because she didn't stand up. Quickly she was falling toward the ground. I took a step forward, placing my arms out. I caught her just under her arms. I breathed in her scent deeply without even thinking about it, her hair was in my face all around my mouth and nose. My heart rate increased as my lungs filled with Bella scented air. I stood there holding her for several seconds. She was even lighter than I had would have imagined, she seemed so fragile and breakable in my arms. I was cursing Emmett for treating her like some rag doll.

Then Emmett's loud chuckle filtered into my brain. "Good catch Eddie." I looked up at him a glared.

Then Bella's voice came soft from in front of me, "What the hell?"

I tried to lift her back onto her feet, but she just couldn't seem to get them underneath her. Instead I lowered her back toward the ground outside the classroom. A few people had now gathered and were trying to figure out what was going on. Emmett was still laughing. As I held her with one arm, and came to her side, "Are you OK?" She nodded slightly, then her eyelids fluttered a bit and her head lulled back. "I think she just passed out."

"Your kidding," Emmett said, leaning in toward her. "Bella?"

Her eyes opened wide, as she pulled her head up off of my arm. Her thick mahogany waves brushing across the back of my arm caused goosebumps to rise on it. She brought her hand to her face, rubbing over her eyes and brow. "Fuck," she finally said, "Did I throw up?" I was taken aback by her cursing, I don't know what I expected but it wasn't that. Emmett just laughed. Bella looked around and I noticed a pink blush rising up her neck and into her cheeks. I wanted so badly to reach up and touch her face, to see if her porcelain skin was as soft and delicate as it looked, since her choice of words had shown me she wasn't as demure as she seemed. My free hand twitched at my side, suddenly Bella was out of my arm. _Did I do that?_ I was afraid I'd done something stupid.

But, then I realized Bella was trying to stand. I scurried to my feet beside her, catching her again as she stumbled backward. She turned her head and looked at me. Her eyes widened, she looked surprised to see me standing beside her. My arm was around her waist, still supporting her slightly, "Hi," she said. I nodded at her. Then she straighted herself up, finally seeming strong enough to support her own weight. "Damn it Emmett," she breathed, "Don't ever do that again."

"Crap Bella. How the hell was I supposed to know you'd pass out."

"Now you know. Never again."

I was still standing by her side with my hand lightly on her back. My lungs had been filled with her scent, and I swear it was burning down my throat. I felt like my hand was vibrating and the metallic hum had returned to my ears. Bella turned to me then, pulling herself away from my hand slightly. I dropped my hand quickly, wondering how long I'd been touching when she didn't need it. "Um, thanks?" she said uncertainly, then flashed me a smile. My heart stopped. There was seriously something wrong with me.

I avoided her eyes, remembering how they had held me yesterday. I didn't want to stand there looking at her like some kind of crazy person. Finally I nodded at her, it felt like several minutes had pasted. The bell hadn't rang so I'm pretty sure it was only seconds though, I hoped like hell it was. Then turning I walked into the open classroom door and hurried to my seat. Bella entered the room a bit later, smiling widely, just as the bell rang. Sauntering over and tossing her bag on our lab table, before dropping herself to her stool. She placed her elbow on the table and propped her chin on her hand, turning and looking at me over her shoulder.

"Emmett wouldn't tell me, did I throw up?"

Her pale skin was still flushed pink from her earlier embarrassment. She was wearing a deep blue top today that set off her skin. It was loose enough to not show curves but it had a deep scoop neck that reveled cleavage. _Shit_, she was going to think I was looking at her breasts. I quickly looked up at her face, she was biting her lower lip softly. There was no way I could speak to answer her, I shook my head. She looked at my face, suddenly her teeth let go of her lip, she'd noticed me watching. She dropped her arm to table and jerked her head forward to the front of the room, pulling herself straight in her stool.

"Sorry," she mumbled.

Sorry? For what? I didn't understand. I was about to ask when Mr Banner cleared his throat at the front of the room. I pulled out my notebook to take notes, Bella dropped her head to the table and started trying to stand her pen on it's end.

_BELLA_

_Ugh_, my stomach was still rolling. I thought that the buzzing in my head had stopped but when I sat down in my seat in bio it came back. At least I hadn't vomited.

I could have killed Emmett for embarrassing me like that. Could have, if he wasn't like 5 times my size. That and I'd have to find someone else to buy my cigarettes.

**a/n - hopefully the next update won't take as long :) review and i'll try extra hard ;)**


	8. Chapter 8

**a/n- this one was kind of a challenge to me, not really flowing in the direction i thought it would. hope you like it! let me know! please!**

**i own nothing, well a friend of mine did just offer to split the cost of a life size edward cardboard cutout, but i haven't got back to her on that yet :)**

_BELLA_

Relief washed over me when the final bell rang. I immediately headed for my truck, jumped in and lit up a cigarette. Wondering when the hell I become so dependent on these things. I pulled my phone out of the glove box, 2 calls from Renee, 1 from Charlie. This is why I left the phone in the truck, I rolled my eyes. I deleted the messages they'd left without listening to them.

I stared out my window watching as the mass of the student body were piling into vehicles around me. I decided it I'd just wait till the rush died down before trying to leave. Why sit in a line when I could just wait here and have another cigarette, I wasn't in a hurry to be anywhere. I just sat there and watched all the kids as they were joking with one another and yelling good-byes across the parking lot. Just generally having a good time with one another. I closed my eyes, sure I was pissed and bitter about being shipped off to Forks, but I realized beyond that I was lonely.

I'd never really thought of myself as a social creature. I was happy to hang out by myself with a good book, but while I was reading Alice would always stop by, or Jasper would holler over the fence, and then there was James. And now I had only had Charlie, who was so used to living alone, I barely registered on his radar. I was really missing some kind of human connection.

I wanted to cry. But there was no way I was going to sit in the school parking lot and fall apart. No one was getting that satisfaction. No one.

My phone buzzed on the seat beside me. Alice. "Hey"

"Are you done with school?" Something was wrong. Alice wasn't her usual bubbly self and she was far too straight to the point.

"Yeah."

"Have you talked to your mom?"

"No. Why?" I could feel guilt and panic rising in my chest.

"I know why James hasn't been at school?"

"Spit it out Alice. Is everything OK?" If anything involved Renee and James it wasn't OK. I already knew that.

"Everyone is fine. But, Jasper's mom was talking to your mom yesterday and I guess when they got home on Monday night James was out in front of your house and just when ape-shit. He hit Phil and Phil hit him back and knocked his ass out. Renee called the cops."

"So he's in jail." I interrupted softly. The guilt I'd felt at not returning her calls, gone.

"No." Alice paused.

I didn't know what to say or ask. If he'd hit Phil, he'd be in deep shit. He had turned 18 over the summer, so he was no longer a minor. And even if he had still been a minor his juvenile record was a mile long. Many of the run-ins he'd had with the law over the last year had been due to calls from Renee or Phil. While I was there, I'd never let Renee press any charges, without me around I knew they would. Phil totally would. There was no way he wasn't going to spend at least a few days in lock up. And I knew that his dad wasn't going to bail him out if he'd landed himself in jail again. He'd had it with James' antics awhile ago, which is partly why he spent most nights in my room.

"He ran Bella. Came to before the cops showed up, got up and ran. I guess the cops are supposed to be looking for him." My stomach rolled, I held my chest with my free arm. This was fucked up, in ways I couldn't even have imagined. "Has he called you yet?"

I violently shook my head, opening and closing my mouth, but I couldn't make words. "Bella?" I still couldn't will words out. "Bella? Are you there? Are you OK?"

"Alice," I breathed.

"Yeah?"

"What the fuck?"

"Bella have you talked to him since Sunday night?"

"No," I answered, unable to bring my voice above a whisper. "Alice if they find him, he's going to prison."

"Yep." I could hear the satisfaction in Alice's voice. "They're probably trying to get a hold of you, the cops here. They came to school today and talked to Jasper and me." I said nothing, and the pause in conversation was awkward. "Your mom and Phil are fine, by the way."

_Fuck, seriously_.

"Bye Alice."

"Bell.." I hung up on her.

I buried my head in my hands and breathed deeply. I know that Alice hadn't meant to piss me off.

I don't think Alice really understood what had been going on in my head for awhile. For that matter, really, I don't think I understood either.

I quickly dialed James' cell number. Hoping that he'd taken it with him. After a few rings it went to voicemail, "James, baby. I just talked to Alice. If you get this get to a pay phone and call me. I love you, I'm worried. Call me, baby. Please?"

I'd never felt so apart from everything.

James had been my world for the last year.

And that world was laying in ruins. I knew that Renee and Phil hated my relationship with James. They never had any qualms about telling me that to my face. Now Alice was telling me exactly how strongly she felt about it. I had no idea what to think and I couldn't talk to James. I was lost.

I pulled at the ring hanging from the chain on my neck and lit yet another cigarette. James used to wear it himself, it was gold and several garnet stones inlaid in it. Garnet was his birthstone, he was a New Year's baby. James had given the ring to me to hold before he was locked up for a few weeks last year, when I tried to give it back he told me he liked it where it was. Hanging around my neck, letting everyone know I was spoken for.

He liked to pull the chain tight around my neck, "just a reminder that your mine," he'd say. God I loved when he'd do that. Usually with his other hand resting on my thigh. I pulled the chain around my own neck and couldn't help but remember.

He'd slide his hand up my thigh, when he hit the top and realized I wasn't wearing panties, his grin would widen. "Good girl," he'd whisper huskily in my ear, before plunging a thick finger into my folds. I'd gasp, as he'd remove it, wet with my juices while holding my eyes with his ice blue ones. He kept that eye contact as he put his finger into his mouth and tasted. "Good girl." Then he'd grab me by the wrist and drag me to the nearest private area.

_Fuck_, I thought. _Fuck, fuck fuck_.

I turned the key in the ignition and the Beast roared to life. I hit the gas harder than necessary and lurched forward, turning a little to tightly I nearly caught the back end of the silver Volvo parked next to me. Who the hell drives something like that around here, fucking pretentious motherfucker. I tore off down the highway as fast as the Beast could handle, which wasn't very.

When I hit the city limit of Forks I turned around and drove back the other way. Then again. And again. Fuck, Forks is a small ass town. It wasn't like I could leave, where would I go. Finally I stopped. I pulled over to the side of the roadway and lit another cigarette. My eyes shut tight I hit my head repeatedly on the back of the seat. I probably looked fucking crazy to anyone who, drove past. Hell, I felt fucking crazy.

Then I heard the siren. I opened my eyes and could see the flashing lights reflecting in my rear view mirror. What the fuck? At least I knew it wasn't a moving violation, but what the hell did I do.

I turned my head and saw Gabe Caius climbing from his cruiser. I sighed. I'd known Gabe as long as I could remember, he'd worked with Charlie forever. I rolled down my window and the light drizzle fell on my face.

"Hey Bella," Gabe said. I smiled weakly. "Your dad said you forgot something at school?"

"Shit." Realization dawned on me. I pushed at my lower lip with my index finger, then bit down lightly.

"I'm supposed to make sure you go back and get it?"

I leaned my head back again, and ran my hand through my hair as I continued to chew on my lip. "I really did forget."

Gabe shrugged. "Well I'll just follow you back over to the school."

Now it was my turn to shrug as I turned the key in the ignition. Gabe headed back to his cruiser, climbing in and leaving his lights flashing as we both made u turns. He left them on the whole drive back to the school. Fucking ridiculous. I pulled up in front of the school, and hopped out of my truck. Gabe climbed out of his cruiser and stood watching me as I walked into the office to get my packet of homework.

The score now stood at Bella 0, Charlie 3.

**EDWARD**

After the last bell rang I headed to the locker room and changed into a pair of shorts and a tee shirt, then tied on my running shoes. I met with the rest of Forks Highs small cross country team and we decided on a route to run. Our faculty advisory, , was there purely to make us an official school sanctioned team that could compete in meets. He didn't run, and didn't pretend like he did, he just sat back and let us do our thing, which was nice.

We decided to do a loop on the forest edge, basically running the perimeter of Forks, it was roughly a 10 mile run the way we had it planned. I stretched out then pushed my ear buds into my ears turned on my ipod and headed out. The damp air rushing past helped to clear my mind.

Mile one, I could think of nothing but Bella. Same for mile two. By mile five I'd moved on to Emmett, what the fuck was he playing at. He wasn't interested in Bella, only in pissing Rose off and it wasn't fair to do anyone, but especially not to someone as beautiful as Bella. Mile seven, I started questioning my sanity. I'd spent the last 50 minutes obsessing about a girl I'd spoken maybe five words to. Mile eight, I was sure I was crazy. Mile nine, I wondered how hard it was for crazy people to get into Stanford. By the time I finished my mind was mine again.

After my run I stripped off my tee shirt and threw it into my bag. I figured I'd just shower at home, I said later to the 4 guys who had also finished before heading toward my car.

I froze when I saw Bella's truck sitting at the base of the steps to the school. Damn, I just got that girl out of my head. Behind her truck sat a police car with it's lights flashing, an officer, not her father, leaning against the door. I looked around me, not seeing her I started walking toward my car again.

"Happy now." Came a shout from behind me. Fuck, even pissed off her voice was amazing, it gave me chills. I stopped again, and looked over my shoulder. Watching as Bella came barreling down the steps, waving some papers in her hand.

"Hey now, it's not my doing Bella," officer replied, fiddling with his walkie-talkie.

"Well, I've got it. I'm sorry. I fucking forgot." She headed to the drivers side of her truck. "See ya."

"Well, Bella," he started, raising one eyebrow at her. Whatever he was going to say he knew she wasn't going to like it. "I'm kinda, supposed to." Bella closed her eyes and took a deep breath, fury evident in everyone of her beautiful features, it was kinda hot.

"What," she spat.

"Bella, I, um, I need you to come down to the station."

"No. Fuck that. No." Bella was shaking her head vigorously while she spoke. Her arms folded tight across her chest. "I didn't do anything. I know my fucking rights."

"Bella, your dad just wants to talk to you."

She was chewing on her lower lip now. "He can talk to me at home. He can call me on my phone. Why the fuck would I have to go to the station?"

"Bella, I don't really know. I was told to ask you to come to the station," he took a deep breath. "And, to follow you home if your refused."

"And what if I just stay here?"

"I don't know. I radio your dad and ask him?"

"What the fuck?" Bella said to no one in particular.

It struck me then that I'd been standing there watching all this. What the fuck indeed. What the fuck was wrong with me. The officer was talking into his radio and Bella was pulling a pack of cigarettes out of her truck. I looked around again, no one else was around and I didn't think Bella had noticed me witness anything. I debated whether I should go ahead toward my car, she'd have to notice me then cause I'd have walk by her truck, or just turn back the way I came and avoid her.

Why the fuck do I need to sneak around and avoid her?

"So Bella, what are you doing?"

"What are my options Gabe?"

"I follow you to the station, or I follow you home. Your dad doesn't think you'll stick around here, so I'm supposed to wait till you decide to leave."

"This is fucking stupid."

The officer shrugged. "Maybe, he just wants to talk to you."

"About what?"

"Can't say."

"Do you know?" He shrugged again. Bella took a drag off her cigarette and then shut her eyes tightly. "This is fucked up," she said softly. Then gathered her hair in her free hand and pulled it over her shoulder, before shaking it loose again. That's when she saw me.

Still frozen in place. I wanted to die.

Bella's face lit with a crazy smile and her eyes got a wild glint. "Edward, right?"

I swear my heart stopped. When did I become such a fucking girl? I nodded at her, I couldn't think of anything intelligent enough to answer with. It was like those drug commercials with the egg, except this was my brain anywhere near Bella.

She glanced over to the officer beside his car, he was shaking his head. Bella shrugged and turned her wicked grin on me. I was in trouble, the officer standing there knew it. He gave me a slight smile as he shook his head again, shrugging.

"So, Edward, what are you up to?"


	9. Chapter 9

_BELLA_

"Um," Edward's eyes were darting between Gabe and me, he looked like a deer caught in the headlights. "Um, I was, um, going home to do homework."

I wrinkled up my nose at him, in a way I hoped came off as cute. He was way too fucking hot to be doing homework. Really, if I was honest with myself, he was too hot to want to hang out with me. I'd sat next to Edward for an hour two days in a row now, but I hadn't really noticed much besides his eyes. Now standing there shirtless, still glistening with sweat from some athletic activity, he was fucking beautiful. I guessed that he was a swimmer or a runner, because his entire body was toned and muscular without being big, the shorts had me thinking runner. I tipped my head toward Gabe, "You'd have to follow me, huh?" Gabe nodded at me. I looked back at Edward shaking my head, "That won't work for me."

Holy crap, what the hell had come over me. Apparently being pissed off at the world brings out a whole new side of Bella. I smiled to myself, then shrugged at Edward, "We'll have to hang out here."

Edward looked around, obviously contemplating his options. Then he looked at his watch. "The library is just up the street, unless, you wanna stay out her in the rain? We could walk?"

I bit down on my lower lip as I smiled. I looked at Gabe out of the corner of my eye, he just shook his head. I was sure Charlie had filled him in about what he knew of my life in Phoenix. I really didn't know what Charlie knew, but whatever it was Gabe wasn't surprised by me. "Lead the way."

When I looked up at Edward his green eyes sparked and he shot me this lopsided grin, that was way too perfect. I could feel it in my groin like a lightning bolt. Edward rummaged through his bag pulling out a hunter green hoodie and pulling it on. _Bummer_. "Let me toss this in my car." He gestured to the duffel bag hanging from his shoulder, then started heading across the parking lot, I followed. Gabe hopped into his cruiser, and slowly rolled along after us. I figured it would be so much easier to be followed around all afternoon if I had some company, and Edward seemed like he'd be OK company.

He pulled keys from the pocket of the duffel bag, jostling them in his hand a bit. There were still several cars left in the parking lot, mostly belonging to members of different sports teams I was sure. The lights flashed a couple times on the silver Volvo I'd been parked next to earlier and the trunk lifted. I bit down on my lower lip, Edward was the pretentious motherfucker. I breathed out a laugh, he looked back at me with an eyebrow cocked. I shrugged and shook my head, grinning.

He tossed his bag into the trunk of his car and pulled out a laptop bag. I stood there in the drizzle with my arms folded across my chest, hood over my head, wishing I'd grabbed my last few cigarettes from my truck. I exhaled loudly, then bit down on my lip. "What?"

I shrugged. "How old are you?"

"Why?"

"I'm almost out of cigarettes."

"I thought my brother was getting those for you?"

That confused me. "Your brother?"

"Emmett."

I didn't see that one coming. "Emmett's your brother. Huh?" I shrugged. "He's supposed to bring me some tomorrow."

"I wouldn't buy them for you if I could." I looked over at him, caught up by something familiar in his eyes I stopped walking. "They'll kill you, you know." He had stopped as well, he quirked his eyebrow at me and shot me that crooked sex grin. My breath caught in my chest, I couldn't respond, I barely managed a nod. Edward chuckled and ran his hand through his hair. "Your far to pretty to give up your life that easily," he said in almost a whisper, before ducking his head down and starting to walk again.

I was so glad he wasn't watching. I could feel the heat of a blush rising to my cheeks.

The library was just a few blocks from the school and Gabe followed the entire way in his cruiser then parked just outside the entrance. As we approached the door I reached out for the handle, but Edward sidestepped me and grabbed it first, holding the door open for me. I chewed on lip as I walked through. "This way," Edward led us to a table toward the back of the small library.

Edward pulled out one of the chairs at a round table, he stood behind it for a moment, while I dropped myself into the chair across from it. He closed his eyes and reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose with his long fingers. A few seconds passed in silence. Finally he set his laptop on the table, he pulled an notebook and a trigonometry textbook from his backpack and then sat down. I chewed on my lip as continued to set up for some sort of extreme homework event, it was bizarre. The work being done in the classrooms of Forks High, didn't warrant the crazy studying it seemed Edward was getting ready to do.

I sat in silence watching him prepare. When he finally seemed to have everything were he wanted it, he looked at me questioningly. His eyes met mine, then traveled down my face, he stared at my mouth. I froze, my teeth pushing into my lower lip, I slowly released my lip from my nervous chewing. I frowned, then rubbed my hand across my mouth holding three fingers over my lips. "Sorry."

"For what?"

I shrugged.

"You said that earlier, you know? 'Sorry'. You didn't do anything to warrant apologizing."

I shrugged again, and tried to look nonchalant.

James hated me chewing on my lip. I never really understood why but it pissed him off, he used to slap me lightly in the mouth when he caught me doing it. Trying to break me of the habit. Phil saw him do it once, James and I were watching TV on the living room couch one afternoon. It had been the first time that my parents called the cops on James.

"Hey, what the hell. Did you just hit her." Phil yelled, coming in from the kitchen.

James glared at him. "He was just playing," I told Phil, snuggling close to James' side. James pulled me closer and kissed the top of my head, then smiled at Phil.

"Didn't anyone ever tell you not to hit girls?" Phil asked.

James shrugged. "He was just playing, Phil."

"Yeah, I was just playing, Phil."

A short while later the cops were at the door. They arrested James.

Edward looked back down at his homework, then back up at me. "Are you going to explain anything."

I shrugged again.

"I don't really mind sitting here doing my homework. But I would have taken a shower if I knew I wasn't going straight home."

I laughed lightly. This in turn lit Edward's face with his sex grin, his eyes held mine. I blushed, my ears rang and I could not look away. It seemed like time stopped. Suddenly my hand flew to my chest with more force than I intended, the loud slapping sound caused a few others in the library to look at us. Edward's eyes broke from mine as he look to the source of the noise. My hand was clasped tightly around James' ring.

**EDWARD**

As beautiful as Bella was, I still wasn't quite sure what to make of her. One minute she was bold, enchanting, her face lit with a wicked grin, now she sat here awkwardly, quiet and apologizing for God knows what. And evasive as all hell.

"So?"

She released the necklace she was wearing and leaned forward, placing her elbows on the table and her face in her hands. She sighed loudly.

"Am I going to be in some sort of trouble being here with you?"

Her face lit with a smile. Damn she was beautiful. She kept her head in her hands while she shook it. "The only one who's going to be in trouble is me."

"Why?"

She shrugged, "I'm avoiding finding that out."

I said nothing.

"Can I tell you something?"

I nodded.

"I really don't know what is going on," she whispered. "I guess a friend of mine is running from the cops in Phoenix." I was trying to be non judgmental, but I probably raised my eyebrows instinctively. She sealed her lips together tightly.

"Why?"

"He hit my step dad."

"Huh. Some friend."

"He was just mad. That they sent me here." Her brown eyes looked at me imploring me to say something helpful. She looked so lost, sad. But I had no idea what to say. I simply nodded, willing her to continue. "Yeah. So. I'm sure they contacted Charlie and wanna know if I've talked to him."

"And have you?"

Her eyes were filling with tears, "No," she whispered. She dropped her head down, burying her face in her hands. Her shoulders shook lightly. Shit, was she crying. I had no idea what to do.

"Bella," came a man's voice from behind me.

She wiped at her eyes, before bringing her head up. "Hey, Dad."

"You OK, Bells?"

She nodded stiffly, "I'm fine."

"Edward," the Chief nodded at me. "Homework?"

I nodded back, "Yeah."

"I'm gonna take Bella home now. So, uh, you can get back to whatever you had planned for this afternoon."

"This was pretty much it, Chief Swan." I replied gesturing to the table in front of me.

"Sure," he nodded. Sounding as though he didn't believe me.

"Come on, Bells."

"No." she said softly, though it sounded more like a question than a refusal.

Charlie leaned in close to Bella, talking in a hushed voice. I swear I heard him say something about "cuffs" and "the station" before Bella stood. Her eyes still moist and full of hurt. "Thanks," she whispered to me.

"Here." I shoved a scrap of paper into her hand. My fingers brushing hers lightly. I pulled back sharply at the electric zap I felt. Her head snapped up and her eyes met mine, she'd felt it too.

_BELLA_

Apparently Gabe had taken my truck back to Charlie's. On the ride home Charlie asked me if I'd spoken to my mom, Phil or James. I told him the truth, that I hadn't spoken to James in days. He seemed content with that. He told me to call Renee when he dropped me off at the house.

After I climbed from the cruiser, I headed for my truck. I opened the passengers side and looked into the glove box. My cigarettes were gone. "Fuck you!" I cursed out loud. I went inside and threw myself across my bed. I pulled out the scrap of paper Edward had handed me.

It had a phone number on it.


	10. Chapter 10

_BELLA_

Charlie had knocked on the door when he'd come home. And again when he'd ordered pizza. I was hiding out. For reasons even I didn't fully understand.

I think at some point I must have fallen asleep.

My stomach rumbling woke me up. It was 1:15 am and I couldn't remember eating anything since the morning before. I crept quietly out of my room, the door to Charlie's room was closed. I slipped down the stairs and into the kitchen, pulled a slice of pizza from the box in the fridge and put it in the microwave. When it was hot I took a bite and headed into the living room.

"Bella," came a voice from the dark. I just about jumped out of my skin.

"Dad," I mumbled.

"Come sit down." I closed my eyes and sighed, before dropping myself to the couch.

"Have you been waiting here all night?"

"No. I heard you get up."

I took another bite of my pizza, though my appetite was waining.

Finally Charlie spoke again. "I don't know everything that was going on when you were living at your mom's. Just a few of the finer points," he cocked an eyebrow at me, as though we were sharing an inside joke. I didn't think the joke was all that funny. I stared blankly at him, then he continued, "I do know that, your mom and Phil both love you."

"I know," I answered quickly.

"They're worried." I said nothing. I forced another bite of pizza into me, my appetite now completely gone. "Do you know what happened Monday?"

I nodded, "Alice told me."

"He used his credit card in Bakersfield earlier this week. Do you know if he knows anyone there?"

I shrugged and shook my head. "I'm going to bed," I stated rising from the couch.

"You know, I love you too Bells?"

"I know."

"I'll let you know what I know."

I nodded, then threw the half eaten slice of pizza in the trash and returned to my room, shutting the door behind me. I climbed back onto my bed and shut my eyes.

The next time I woke it was to a constant pounding on the door, it was 7 am. "What?" I groaned.

"Didn't want you over sleeping again," Charlie called from behind the door, I could here the smile in his voice. "You should get up and get in the shower."

"Fuck," I moaned, yawning wide and stretching. "Fuck this shit," I breathed before rolling out of bed. Charlie was still knocking at the door. "I'm up," I said as I swung the door open.

"Good." Charlie turned and headed down the stairs, he was already in uniform.

I headed into the bathroom, showering slowly with the water as hot as I could tolerate. I dressed in a pair of skinny jeans and one of James' wife beaters, that had managed to end up in my bag. Then grabbed one of Charlie's uniform shirts from his room, pulling it on as I came downstairs.

"Bella, you can't wear that," he said, as I poured myself a cup of coffee.

"What?" I shrugged "We match."

"I wear that shirt. Hang on." Charlie disappeared back upstairs. A moment later he reappeared. "How 'bout this one?" He held up one of his older uniform shirts. "This one doesn't really fit so well anymore," he said, patting his midsection and laughing.

I raised an eyebrow at him. "Thanks," I answered flatly. This was not the reaction I was expecting. Charlie had thrown me another curve ball. Turning I pulled off one shirt and exchanged it for the one Charlie had brought down. Then grabbed my coffee and took a sip.

"You better get going. You want a travel mug for that?"

"Sure." Charlie pulled a mug from the cabinet and handed it to me. I poured my coffee from one cup to the other.

"Are you gonna eat anything?" I shrugged. "Take a granola bar with you at least Bells."

I nodded, he tossed me a granola bar from across the room. I turned and grabbed my backpack and jacket, then headed for the door. "See ya' Dad," I called over my shoulder. It was weird in there, I had to get out.

Climbing into the cab of my truck I checked the glove box, hoping that my cigarettes would be there. Maybe I'd missed them the day before, maybe Charlie had put them back. No such luck. I fired up the Beast and pulled away from the curb. As I was heading up the street I noticed Charlie's cruiser behind me. At the stop sign I waved in the rear view before turning, knowing the station was the other direction.

But Charlie stayed behind me. _What the hell._ He followed me the whole way to the school, turning into the parking lot behind me. _What kind of bullshit was this? _I pulled into a spot near the back of the lot, barely shutting off the truck before jumping out.

I ran over to Charlie's window, "What?" I blurted out.

"Just making sure you made it in one piece, Bella." Charlie replied before driving off, a smile on his face.

I was livid. "Motherfucker," I mumbled, walking back over to the truck and slamming the door. I was now desperate for a cigarette. I opened the truck door again, climbing over and checking the glove box yet again. I slammed it shut when once again my cigarettes didn't magically appear. I had to stop doing that to myself. I slammed the truck door shut for good measure. And started walking toward the school.

"Nice shirt," came Emmett's booming voice from behind me. _Damn he was fucking loud._ I stopped in my tracks, turning with a grin starting to form on my lips. "Here you go Babe," Emmett handed me a plastic bag.

I jumped up and threw my arms around Emmett's neck. "Oh, my God! Thank you. Emmett, your my new best friend."

He laughed as he lowered me back to the ground, darting his eyes around the parking lot. "Now you owe me."

"Is she watching?"

He shrugged, "I don't see her." He was still scouring the parking lot with his eyes. "You look fucking hot, by the way. Woman in uniform and all that. I almost feel bad for wasting your time. Not that there's are any better guys around here than me."

"Ha ha," I smiled. "You seem to think pretty highly of yourself."

"Is there any other way to think of me?" I lit up a cigarette out of one of my new packs. "Seriously, Emmett, your my fucking hero today." I took a long drag and exhaled slowly. "I met you brother yesterday."

"Met him? I thought you had a class with him?"

"I do. I just didn't know he was your brother till yesterday."

"How'd you figure that out."

"We hung out, after school."

"Huh, he didn't tell that." Emmett looked disgruntled.

I was pleased. This was what I'd been trying to get at without having to ask directly. Edward hadn't said anything, I could breath a sigh of relief. I didn't want everyone at Forks High knowing about my personal life. Well my "real" personal life. They could talk all the shit they wanted about whatever perceptions they had of me, or Emmett and me I guess. I just didn't want them knowing about ME.

Emmett looked down at his watch, just as the first bell rang. I rolled my eyes and took another drag of my cigarette. "I better get going. I'll see you at lunch."

"I'll be out here with my nicotine," I smiled lazily. Emmett nodded with a slight grin and headed toward the school.

I took off my backpack and put the bag with the carton of cigarettes and several lighters into it. I had thought about putting it in my truck, but I did trust Charlie not to take these too. The second bell rang as I finished up my cigarette, then headed into school. I would have stayed out there longer but it was starting to rain again.

**EDWARD**

I pulled into the school parking lot a minute or so after Emmett did. Parking a few cars down from where I saw Bella slamming her truck door as her father pulled away. Emmett was walking toward Bella with a bag in hand. Her cigarettes I assumed. I stood beside my Volvo and watched her launch her little body into my brothers arms. I wanted to vomit.

She looked fucking sexy as hell. In tight dark jeans that hugged her ass and one of her dad's brown button down uniform shirts open, over a wife beater that clung to her. And showed off the dark bra she had on beneath it. Fucking sexy. And my fucking brother, who only wanted to piss off his girlfriend had his hands on her.

I don't know what I was expecting after yesterday. It was weird. The whole thing was just weird. I think Bella had opened up to me more than she had to anyone in Forks. I knew something real about her, not some rumor. Then her dad showed up and I swear he threatened to arrest her, that's weird in itself.

I gave her my number. I hoped that she would call. I didn't really expect her to, but I hoped. She didn't. I wasn't shocked. I was kind of disappointed, but not surprised. Still I chastised myself for hoping. Especially now. Watching her smile at my brother.

What the hell was it with me and this girl.

I closed my eyes and stormed past them, headed to my first class.

I swear my day only went down hill from there. Rosalie had apparently caught the display in the parking lot too. I had barely reached the edge of the parking lot when she was by my side. Wrapping her arm around mine, "Hi Eddie," she cooed.

"Fuck off Rose."

"Is that anyway to greet your 'new best friend'?" I laughed inwardly, apparently she'd gotten a ringside seat earlier, she'd heard Bella squealing.

"Fuck off. Ive got places to be."

"Well, I'll see you at lunch," Rose grinned. Her grin sickened me further.

I tried to fool myself into thinking that Rose was kidding as I sat in the cafeteria with Ben. He was going on about some kung-fu movie he'd seen last weekend, when his voice dropped off suddenly. I felt hands lightly drop onto my shoulders, "Hey there, Eddie," came her voice low in my ear.

I rolled my eyes and sighed. "Hey Rose, I told you to fuck off this morning. It still stands," I said, closing my eyes and pinching the bridge of my nose.

"Now, now, is that anyway to talk to a lady?"

"I don't really give a shit."

She pushed out her lower lip in a pout, "Eddie."

"Edward." I growled. "Now. Fuck. Off."

Rose laughed and sat down beside me. Ben was eying Rosalie curiously, but had still yet to speak since she'd come over. "Ben. Isn't it?" He nodded. "You can go now."

"Fuck you Rosalie." I stood up from the table. What a fucking bitch she was. I really couldn't understand what my brother saw in her. Sure she was hot, but no amount physical beauty could make up for her fucking ugly ass attitude. "Sorry Ben," I said before turning and walking out of the cafeteria.

I noticed on my way to the door that Emmett was no where in sight. Nor was Bella.

I ran my hand through my hair as I stopped just outside the cafeteria doors. "Oh good, we can be alone now," came Rosalie's voice laced with saccharin.

"Seriously Rose, I don't know what your fucking deal is. But really you need to back the fuck off."

"Edward, you know exactly what my deal is. Emmett. Now I don't know what his fucking deal is with the new girl, but I'm sick of it. He's mine. And this ends now and you're going to help me."

"No I'm not." Rosalie was staring me down. "Why don't you just tell him you want him back."

She sneered at me, "Rosalie Hale does not go crawling back to anyone."

"Rose give me a fucking break. Teasing Emmett is obviously not working, so either give it up and tell him the truth, or find someone that's willing to play your fucking games. And just a hint, that's not me."

I turned and walked away from Rosalie, heading toward the science building. I'd fucking had it. Rose and Emmett seriously had to stop fucking playing these stupid ass games with each other. Especially since now it was affecting other people. Namely Bella Swan, I'd put up with this crap for years but she didn't deserve to be part of it.

I glanced out at the parking lot as a strode past, and there they were. Bella putting out a cigarette and hopping out of the bed of her truck. Emmett wrapped an arm around her tiny waist as she laughed at something he said. Had never been more angry with my brother, than this moment, as he played Bella like this. And I couldn't help but wonder how Bella felt about him.

_BELLA_

This day just would not end. A full day of classes at Forks High was complete torture, I would have to come up with something to fix that. Quick. Emmett and I spent the lunch hour in the bed of my truck, thankfully the rain had stopped. I smoked, he talked and ate. Damn that kid could eat. He prattled on about football and his party and other things that I had very little interest in.

I was still pretty caught up in my anger at Charlie. I think it had been showing though as the school day went on, the cigarette in my hand now was helping relax me though. "Emmett will there be lots of alcohol there on Friday?"

"Yep."

"Lots of it?"

"Yep."

"I'll be there."

Emmett smiled widely dimples showing, "I'll pick you up."

At least now I had something to look forward to. Getting drunk. I grinned.

Of course there was still a lot of time between now and then.

Starting with Biology, which was beyond awkward. "Hey," I breathed, as I reached the lab table Edward was already sitting at and sat down beside him. Edward simply nodded, not even turning his head. He never made eye contact with me. He spent the entire period not taking his eyes away from the blackboard, hands clenched in tight fists. What the fuck did he have to be so angry about.

I was grateful that he hadn't said anything about what had happened yesterday and I wanted to tell him as much. I wasn't sure how to broach the subject, and with the way he was acting toward me, I really didn't know what to do. So I did nothing. I tried to ignore him, but couldn't help myself from stealing glances through my hair when I thought he wouldn't notice. When the bell rang I turned to say something to him, but he'd already bolted from his seat and was halfway to the door.

"What the hell did you do to Cullen?" Mike asked as we reached the door.

I shrugged. I honestly had no idea.


	11. Chapter 11

**a/n- first off i want to say a big thanks to you who have been reviewing!! seriously thank you!! you're awesome!!**

**this is a shorter chapter and i'm not sure how i feel about what happens in it. gah, i really just don't know. please let me know what you think.**

**disclaimer- you know none of this is mine, right?**

_BELLA_

Finally the day was over. I was so eager for a cigarette I practically ran to parking lot. I probably looked fucking crazy and I really didn't give a shit. On my way I looked around for Edward, I still wanted to talk to him and now I was wondering what got his panties in a bunch. I didn't see him though. I grabbed a cigarette from the pack in my backpack and stuck a lighter in my pocket. With my unlit cigarette hanging from my lip, I headed to the back of the parking lot. As my truck came into view I nearly shit myself.

"What the fuck," I breathed out loud.

Pulled up into the spot beside my truck was a police cruiser. Gabe was standing beside it giving me a sheepish grin.

"Sorry Bella. Charlie wanted me to follow you home," he said once I was in earshot.

I couldn't speak. I just stared at him with my mouth hanging open.

"Sorry," he shrugged."He's just looking out for ya. Ya know?"

"This is fucked up."

"Bella."

"No fuck this. This shit is fucked up." I stopped and shook my head. "OK? When I get home, what then? Is someone going to be sitting outside the fucking house babysitting me till he gets off?" I couldn't help myself, I was shouting across the parking lot at Gabe and a crowd was starting to gather. I shook my head, "Fucking stupid!"

"Come on now Bella," Gabe said in a low voice.

Angry tears were stinging behind my eyes, "Why is he doing this?" I said softly through gritted teeth.

"He's just looking out."

"Why? What isn't he telling me?"

"Bella, I know the same as you."

At this point I just wanted to get the fuck out of here. Half the fucking school was standing around watching me yell at a police officer, honestly I would probably have to watch this shit too. It was pretty fucking surreal. I fumbled in my pocket for my lighter, I pulled it out and realized my hand was trembling. It took several tries before it the gas and spark caught, I held the small flame to the end of the cigarette I'd ripped from my mouth earlier, staring at Gabe as I inhaled deeply to light it. The nicotine instantly calming me, I closed my eyes and exhaled. "Fuck it," I resigned and continued walking to my truck.

"Miss Swan, there's no smoking on school grounds."

Mr Aro had apparently came from the front office to see what was drawing a crowd in the parking lot. I couldn't help but laugh. I took another drag from my cigarette and opened the door of to my truck. "I'm fucking going," I said jumping up into the cab of the truck andpulling the door shut behind me. A turn of the key bringing the Beast to life and drowning out anything else the principal or anyone else had to say. I backed out quickly andtore out of the parking lot, Gabe's cruiser close behind.

Once back at Charlie's I continued to sit out in the Beast and chain smoke. When I'd moved on to my 2nd cigarette, Gabe had driven off, deciding that I wasn't going anywhere I guessed. After my 5th, I decided to go inside.

Alice hadn't called me today, and I wondered briefly if she would after I'd hung up on her yesterday. After she'd told me what she really thought of James and me. After I paid no attention to her opinions. No, I guessed she wasn't going to call. I chewed gently on my lip as I slowly headed up the walk to Charlie's house.

Charlie's patrol car pulled up into the driveway beside the house, he climbed out as I reached the front step. "Ah, you managed to get yourself more cigarettes I see." I nodded. "Seems you may be in some trouble up at the school tomorrow," a slight smile played on his lips.

I smirked and let out a short laugh, "Well that's sort of your fault isn't it?"

The corners of his mouth pulled up more, the smile flirting with an actual appearance on his lips as he shook his head. "Nope, Bella. You brought that on yourself."

"Fuck. Really?"

"Bella you must know that smoking isn't allowed on school grounds? I'm sure it wasn't allowed at your school in Phoenix either."

I stared at my father. "What the hell are you doing sending me a police escort home? What the hell is going on? You told me last night you'd tell me." I could feel the tears beginning to sting at my eyes again.

"If you'd answer your phone or call me, I wouldn't have to send an escort. And I told you that I'd tell you what I knew. I did. I'm sure the Phoenix police have a lot on their plates, too much I'm sure to worry much about some punk ass kid that tries to beat up on his girlfriends parents. So I'm sure they're not keeping the closest of tabs on his next move and trying to hunt him down." He stared into my eyes. "So, I don't 'know' a lot. But I'll tell you what I think." He extended his index finger and pointed at me. "What I think, Bella, is that he for some reason thinks of you as his property. And I think he thinks that he can come here and get you. And I'm not letting that happen."

I shrugged, and said softly, "He loves me."

"No Bella. He loves having you."

"You don't have any fucking idea. You don't know him."

"I don't need too." He paused, lowering his voice, "Bella, tell me this. Has James ever, ever hurt you?"

I swallowed andlooked down at the ground.

"That's what I thought. I don't need to know him Bella, I've been him."

I looked up in to Charlie's deep brown eyes that were the same as mine. They were so sad. I'm sure the confusion was evident in my face.

"Why do you think your mom left."

I inhaled sharply.

"Let's go inside," Charlie said opening the door to the house and heading in. I followed behind to the kitchen table where we both sat. And Charlie launched into his tale.

I'd known how he and Renee had married just out of high school, that I had come along less than a year later and way before they had planned on. I also knew that Renee had always been miserable in Forks and wanted to see more of the world. But, the rest, that I'd never heard.

My quiet loving father, admitted to being so jealous and possessive he rarely let Renee from his sight before their marriage. After the wedding, when he'd taken law enforcement classes in Seattle Renee stayed in Forks, he came home only on the weekends for six months. During one of his weekend visits home, they fought about what they usually fought about, her being stuck in Forks while he was off in the big city. He lost his temper and hit her, slapped her across the face. When he told me this all the blood drained from my face.

He'd apologized immediately, leaving the house in embarrassment and regret for his actions. But it wasn't the last time. He had never hit me, he promised. It was after a fight that Renee pack our things and left. It was 6 months before he tracked us down in California, Renee demanded a divorce, Charlie gave it to her. She allowed visitation only after he'd gone to therapy and never said a word about the abuse in court knowing it would end his career. She still loved him, she just couldn't do it anymore.

I had no words to respond to all that Charlie had told me.

"So Bella, that's why I can't let him anywhere near you. I broke your mother, she came back, maybe better than before," he smiled softly. "But I still broke her, I did that and I can't ever forgive myself that. And I can't let someone do the same thing to you. I can't." His voice was low, nearly a whisper and his sad eyes were filled with tears that had yet to spill over.

I felt as though I'd been kicked in the stomach. I was having trouble breathing. I couldn't process. Couldn't wrap my head around it all. Couldn't speak.

I pulled off the button down uniform shirt of Charlie's that I had been wearing. My upper arms ringed with the green, purple and blue of fading bruises. The marks made large rough hands grabbing me in anger and shaking, shaking my small intoxicated body, screaming in my face.

That night, after hauling off and slamming some kid through my mother's picture window, with blood still on his hands from that kids face. James had grabbed me, shook me, accused me of flirting with this kid I'd never met before. That's when I passed out. He must have dropped me to the floor and left.

He did it cause he loved me. Because I was his. Right? Did it matter.

It was Charlie's turn to be shocked. He inhaled sharply, blood draining from his face when he recognized what I was showing to him. His face steeled. I closed my eyes and placed my hand around the ring hanging from my neck. Tears began to seep from my eyes. "But he loves me," I whispered.

**a/n-ok so there it was, geez that was kinda heavy huh? hope you didn't hate it.**


	12. Chapter 12

**a/n- thanks to everyone who's reviewed, it makes my day! big thanks to dolphin4442, for reviewing almost every chapter!! and being awesome and liking heathers- i keep meaning to mention that!!**

**btw-twilight ain't mine, but this new little netbook is and boy is my hubby jealous!! :)**

_BELLA_

It had been a long night. Charlie and I talked for over an hour after which I was emotionally exhausted and had a lot to think about. We had pizza delivered again and I sat on the front porch smoking while Charlie watched whatever baseball game was on. A plan had been made, I'd call or text Charlie when I got to school, when I got home, and if I was going to be late. I'd agreed to it because I knew how much it hurt him to be that honest with me. I felt I owed him something in return.

I knew I needed to call Renee, but really I wasn't quite ready for that. Knowing where Charlie was coming from helped some, made me a little less resentful maybe. Though it made some things more difficult. And while I was better able to understand Charlie and Renee's concerns but I still had my own feelings to sort through. Those I didn't know where to start with.

I loved James. Though the fact that he hadn't called did have me thinking that he never felt as strongly about me. But what if Charlie was right, what if he was coming for me? Then what? What did that mean?

I'd been sitting on the front steps for awhile, the rain dripping down from the eves and cold air finally chilling me to the bone. I headed into the house and up the stairs, grabbing some sweats and an old tee shirt from my room. I took a long shower, standing under the flow water until the hot water began to run out. Stepping from the shower I blew my hair completely dry and brushed it smooth. Finally I went into my room.

I picked up my cell phone and scrolled through my contacts. Selecting a number I chose to send a text rather than call.

_I'm sorry. -B_

Then I curled up and went to sleep. I slept hard, I guess hearing heart wrenching confessions can do that to to a person. In the morning Charlie woke me up pounding on the door again. I showered quickly threw on some jeans and a deep v neck tee and pulling my hair up into a ponytail. Coffee was waiting for me in travel mug on the counter.

"I'm heading back to work Bells, don't forget to give me a call." I nodded at him as Charlie walked out the door. "And eat something," he hollered over his shoulder.

Charlie was something I wasn't really used to, he was a parent. Renee was my mom and she loved me, but she treated me more like a friend, allowed me to parent over her even. In the last year Phil had tried more at being a parent than Renee, though it had kind of backfired. I think the difference was that Charlie was trusting me to do the right thing and when I didn't he was giving me a reason to trust in what he was asking from me. It worked I guess.

I grabbed an apple and stepped out into another rainy Forks day. I drove to the school still saturated in an emotional haze. Pulling into the parking lot could tell today was going to suck as I watched the heads of other students swivel toward my truck then turn back toward their friends, saying things I was glad I couldn't hear over the roar of the Beast's engine. Yes, today would be miserable. I parked near the back of the lot again and dialed Charlie's cell as I finished up a cigarette. "Hey Dad, I'm at school."

"Alright Bells."

"I'll call you after school."

"OK. Hey Bells are you going over to the Cullen's tonight?"

"You know about that?"

"Small town remember? It's my job to know these things."

I couldn't help but smile. "Yeah, I'm going."

"Hrump. Well we'll talk about that later. Have a good day."

Saying goodbye, I flipped my phone shut, ground out my cigarette in the ashtray and climbed from the truck. Standing there in the rain with my hood up blocking my peripheral vision I braced myself for the day. I rolled my head from side to side and shook my shoulders out, like a boxer before a fight. I turned and looked around me, spotting Edward's Volvo just a couple open spots away from me.

Edward was sitting inside, watching me closely. My arm rose slightly as I went to give him a smile and wave, then I remember yesterday. I dropped my head and turned back to my truck shutting the door and walking away. I really don't know why he was so pissed off yesterday. I could only assume it had to do with me dragging him into my business the other day. But then he'd given me his number. Maybe he was pissed that I didn't call. I don't know and I really didn't have the energy to figure it out now. I had enough issues without making him one of them.

Walking quickly to get out of this mornings heavy rain I headed to the front of the school. Loving the way the rain and the hood of my coat cut me off from the rest of the world. "Bella," came a loud bellow from behind me.

I slowed slightly, but didn't stop walking, letting Emmett catch up to me. He tossed a large arm over my shoulder, I flinched slightly but didn't look at him. "Shit Bella, I heard you put on a show yesterday after school. Cussing at an officer of the law, huh?" I simply shrugged in answer. I knew everyone was talking what happened yesterday, but I refused to answer any of the whys. "Are you still coming tonight?"

I nodded, still not making eye contact. "Awesome, I'll take you after the game. Your coming to the game right?" This time I shook my head. Emmett stopped walking, "What?" Emmett hollered. "You have to," his voice dropped off suddenly.

"Miss Swan, why don't you come with me?" Mr Aro said.

Emmett dropped his arm from my shoulder, "I'll talk to you later Bella." I nodded following Aro to his office.

**EDWARD**

The school was fucking buzzing this morning.

It was Friday. The first week of school was nearly done. The first football game of the season was tonight, followed by Emmett's first school year blow out. Though none of these thing was remotely interesting to me, there was some gossip I was interested in. And it had to do with Bella Swan. Lucky for me she seemed to be what everyone else was most interested in too.

By the time I finished with my run yesterday the gossip train had already left the station. Of course news of the police chief's screaming the f word at another officer in the parking lot would spread quickly in a small town like this. Last time I'd been the only one to witness it, I still hadn't said anything. I don't know if I felt like I deserved a pat on the back or what my deal was but I was feeling pretty bitter.

I'd watched her in her truck in the morning, then she'd caught me staring at her. I'm sure I looked like a complete fucking creep. I swear for one second she looked like she was going to wave, then she turned around suddenly. I didn't really get it at first, then I remembered I was a fucking ass to her yesterday.

Midway through the day Rosalie caught up to me in the hall, her grin was wide and wicked as she came toward me. I turned the minute I saw her but it was a minute too late. "Edward," she cooed. Fuck. She grabbed a hold of my hand and I tried to yank it back but she had a death grip on it, her nails dug in so that when I moved my arm they cut into my skin. Her grin widened when I realized that and stopped fighting, not wanting to make a scene. "I'm so excited about tonight," she spoke loudly, not so much to me but to those who might want to listen in. "You can pick me up after the game."

"Like hell, Rose," I growled softly.

She ignored me, releasing my arm, "Talk to you later," she smiled.

I thought about yelling obscenities down the hall at her retreating form, but there didn't seem to be any point to that.

At lunch I took the long way to the cafeteria, walking past the parking lot, scouting for Bella and my brother. Glancing out to where her truck was parked I saw his hulking form climbing into the cab of her truck. Red break lights lit up, followed by white lights as she backed out of the parking spot and drove off. I stood there for a moment staring after them. "Are you jealous?" came a voice from behind me. I shook my head, not so much in answer to the question, but in disgust that it had been asked. "You seem awfully fascinated with the new girl and Emmett."

"So do you."

"That's because Emmett is mine, everyone knows that. Except her. If things don't go as planned tonight, I'll have to show her." Rose said.

"Rose just fucking tell him."

"Fuck no. Besides he'll be begging for me tonight. I'm sure that new girl will be out of the picture with what happened yesterday. I'll have the whole night to remind Emmett what he really likes."

I knew Emmett had planned on Bella coming to his party tonight, it hadn't thought much about whether she'd be there or not. Oh God I hoped so, maybe I'd get another chance to talk to her. I'd ask her in Biology, if she was coming. Or at least I'd try and ask her, if she'd talk to me.

_BELLA_

Fuck me. Fucking Smokeless Saturday. What the fuck kind of garbage was that. Although it did explain Charlie's amusement about the me being in trouble at school. Fucking bullshit.

Mr. Aro took me into his office this morning and lectured me on respecting authority and smoking on school grounds. He said that he figured my father could handle the first issue, but there was a punishment for the second, Smokeless Saturday. Five hours of "education on the dangers of smoking" presented by local law enforcement. Fuck me. And guess who was presenting this month. Bullshit. I think they just made this punishment up, just for me.

Emmett and I had driven down the block so I could have a cigarette at lunch today, off school grounds. "So Bella. What happened yesterday?"

"I yelled at a cop and smoked on school grounds in front of the principal. I think I heard that I threw a lit cigarette at him too." I shrugged.

"Bella, seriously though?"

I was not going to tell him any of it. I couldn't. "It's a long fucked up story Emmett," I shook my head sadly at him. I just hoped like hell he wasn't going to push it.

Looking down at my lap, I played with the lighter in my hand, flicking it on and off. "If you ever need someone to talk to," Emmett shrugged his huge bear like shoulders. I didn't know if I could really trust Emmett. I know he didn't want anything from me, except to make his girlfriend jealous, but who knows. Of course that is part of life, you never know. I shrugged too, ground out a cigarette, fired my truck up and drove back to the school. When I parked Emmett began to climb out. "So I'll come by and get you after the game tonight, OK?" I nodded. "You sure your good? It's OK if you come tonight?"

I nodded softly again, "Ol' Chief Charlie already knew," I said with a slight smile.

Emmett grinned, "It's going to be awesome. I'll walk you to class."

"That's OK. I have something I need to do." He nodded and said he'd see me later and walked off through the Forks rain. I took out my cell phone and dialed.

"Bella!" came Alice's voice, I couldn't help but smile. "I'm so glad you called. I'm so sorry too. I thought it was best to wait till you called though, but it was killing me. I shouldn't have said those things to you. I'm sorry. I just, I."

"Alice," I interrupted. "You were right to tell me everything. I don't know what to do." I told Alice everything, I mean everything. From Charlie's speculations about James' destination, to Charlie's admissions from yesterday, to the difficulties between Phil and I. I was bawling when my call waiting beeped. "It's Charlie, hang on."

"Hey Dad." I rasped into the phone.

"Bella what's going on?" he sounded anxious.

"Nothing. Why?" I was still trying to calm myself.

"Are you crying? Why aren't you in class?"

"Oh my God, I didn't even think about them calling you. I just, I needed to talk to someone, so I called Alice and I just sitting here talking to her."

"Sitting where?"

"School parking lot." I heard Charlie exhale. "I think I might just go home when I'm done though."

"OK, Bella. Maybe you could try calling your mom too."

"We'll see."

I got off the phone Charlie, sitting and talking with Alice for awhile longer. I still didn't have any answers but I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I drove home mired in my thoughts.

**EDWARD**

She never showed up for biology. I sat there at our lab table and did the assignment by myself. I really didn't mind working alone, but I just wanted to see her. Talk to her. Maybe apologize for being a dick yesterday. I was pissed at Rosalie for being a bitch, Emmett for being an ass and the both of them for dragging me into their crap. But not Bella. And with all she had going on, she didn't need shit from me too.

When the bell rang I took the long way to Spanish, passing by the parking lot. Hoping that maybe Bella would be coming in for her last class. Instead I watched her truck pulling out of the parking lot again.


	13. Chapter 13

**a/n- thanks again to those who are leaving me reviews! i love it seriously!! i have to say another thank you to fixie slick, who left me a very flattering review, thanks for that, i should also apologize for my drunken reply (yes i was drunk at 9pm on thursday), so sorry about that.**

**btw-i don't own twilight**

_BELLA_

"OK Bells, if you need a ride be sure to call, I'll be home. The Cullen's live a bit out of town, so don't get a ride with anyone who's been drinking."

I rolled my eyes, "I know."

"Are you taking your truck?"

"No. Emmett's coming to get me."

Charlie's eyebrows pulled together, "Is there something going on between you and that boy?"

I let out a short laugh, and shook my head, "No." After the conversation we'd had last night this was almost weird. In that, it was so normal, so like ones had by parents and children in houses everywhere. Sitting around the kitchen table, discussing weekend plans over dinner. Completely normal. There was a difference though. When I said no, Charlie looked slightly disappointed. In his heart, he knew that the small town trouble maker was preferable to what else was out there.

"Did you call your mom yet?"

I shook my head again, "Not yet."

He sighed loudly, the sadness at my answer was evident in his eyes. I closed my eyes and rubbed my temples roughly. "I will. I'm just not," I cut myself off and exhaled roughly. I couldn't word it right. Honestly, I couldn't even figure out my reasoning behind not having called Renee yet. I knew that she was probably worried, and upset, but I didn't know what to say to her, or how to answer what she might ask. And until I had some idea of where my head was, it would be impossible to calm her fears. "I will," I finished.

Charlie chewed on his lower lip, I wondered if the habit was genetic. "If no one is sober enough to bring you home, I can pick you up, either tonight or in the morning. You have to be up at the school at 9."

Shaking my head I asked, "Is this something you just made up?"

"Nope. It's a program we've had for awhile here. Haven't had to do it for awhile though," he grinned.

"Whatever." I took another bite of the chicken and rice bake I had made for dinner. "So?" I asked nodding my head towards Charlie's plate.

"It's good. A little spicy but not too bad."

I grinned at him, "Told you."

The two of us finished our meal, and I stood taking the plates to the sink and tuning on the water. "I'll do that," Charlie said from behind me, "You cooked, I'll wash. How's that for a deal."

"That'll work." I headed up stairs and took a shower. After the shower I stood draped in a towel rooting through the small amount of clothing that had come with me to Forks, most of which wasn't really right for the weather. I had no idea what was to wear, I didn't know what the kids in Forks wore to parties. Did they dress up, did they just wear what they wore to school? The worst part was I had no one to ask, I had yet to make a single friend in Forks, unless you count Emmett, and I really didn't know if he was a friend, and even if he was he couldn't help me pick out an outfit. No, that wasn't the worst part, the worst part was that I hadn't tried, so I had no one to blame but myself.

Finally I settled on a tight deep blue scoop neck tank and a fitted pair of boot cut jeans, I pulled on a black wrap shirt over for a little warmth, letting it hang loose. Back in the bathroom I curled my hair slightly and applied some lip gloss and little eye shadow. Shrugging at myself in mirror and hoping like hell I looked OK. Where was Alice when you needed her, oh yeah, Phoenix. I headed back into my room, sitting on the bed I pulled on a pair of shoes, flats, I figured they were safer especially if I was drinking.

I glanced at the time, it was almost nine. What the hell, it took me that long to get ready? I went out to the porch cigarettes and lighter in hand, Charlie laughed lightly and shook his head as I walked passed him. "I'm not on school grounds," I called over my shoulder. It had finally stopped raining, though the air was still cool and wet. I lit up a cigarette, inhaling deeply, I stared out into the darkness. An older blue car rolled up the street slowly and I could still hear the game Charlie was watching on the TV, but other than that it was eerily quiet. At least to me, I was having a tough time adjusting from big city life.

Charlie had left an empty Terra Cotta pot on the porch for me to use as an ashtray. I ground out the butt of my cigarette in it and lit another. A loud engine whined in the distance, and a moment later headlights flashed up the street as Emmett's Jeep rounded the corner quickly. He pulled up in front of my truck, facing the wrong way. I put out my cigarette and cracked the front door open slightly, "Bye Dad."

"What he's not gonna come in and meet me? What kind of date is this?" Charlie smiled, eyes never leaving the game, I simply rolled my eyes. He looked up at me, "Call if you need a ride. Or if your staying. Just call."

"Bye." I ran down the front steps and toward the Jeep. I had to jump to make it in, Emmett laughed as I climbed into the seat. I reached over to buckle myself in and was greeted with something I was unfamiliar with. "OK, maybe I'm an idiot, but how the hell do I do this?" Emmett laughed again, then reached over and strapped me in. "What the hell kind of death trap is this, that I need all these fucking straps?"

"It's an off-roading harness."

"We're not off-roading are we?" I asked skeptically.

"Nah. But I do go sometimes, if your nice I'll take you sometime."

"Remind me not to be nice." Emmett laughed as he tore off down my street like a mad man, I was definitely glad for all the extra straps. I was holding on for dear life, squeezing my eyes shut as we headed down the highway and out of town. I felt as we turned left, the ground under us no longer pavement. My eyes flew open, we were surrounded by trees and low brush, "Fuck, Emmett," I yelled in a much higher pitch than I intended. "You said no off-roading."

The Jeep filled with Emmett's loud laughter. "This is the way to my house, Bella, there's a road, it's just not paved." My fingers were twisted tightly around the straps harnessing me to the seat. I was in pure panic mode, not believing a word Emmett said to me, sure he'd drug me out here as some sort of sick joke, possibly a game of drop the city girl in the woods. Somehow I contained my screams as my eyes darted frantically around the area surrounding the Jeep, suddenly the trees ended. We were in a large clearing, in the center of which stood a beautiful, massive white house.

The drive was already lined with cars which Emmett darted around, pulling around the back of the house and into a large garage. I recognized the Volvo he parked next to as Edward's.

**EDWARD**

I guessed that the football game was over when people started showing up in my house. I had spent the evening hiding breakable and locking doors, my mom had already hid a lot of things I noticed. When Ben Cheney showed up we went up to my room on the third floor to play video games. He had brought over this UFC game for the X box and I was kicking his ass, when the door to my room flew open.

Emmett's and my doors were basically the only ones I'd left unlocked, and I thought it was pretty early in the evening for people to be looking for private areas, so I didn't even look up from the game. "There you are," came Rosalie's voice. I still didn't take my eyes off the game, though Ben did manage to get a couple of good hits on me. "She's here."

I sighed, "Fuck off, your fucking up my shit." Ben laughed and pinned me, I pounded buttons on the controller. "Damn it!" I growled, through my gritted teeth.

"Ha," Ben shouted in victory, as the round ended.

I turned my head, "What do you want Rose?"

Her head shook slightly as she narrowed her eye, "You know," she said in a whisper.

I raked my hand through my hair, "I'm not fucking playing."

"Edward Cullen," Rosalie practically growled.

"Fuck you." I hit a button on the controller and the next round started. My eyes were still trained on the game in front of me, though now my mind was else where. She was here. Bella. I wondered how long it would be before I could wander downstairs and look for her, or maybe she'd come up here. I doubted that, what reason would she have for that.

Ben and I continued playing for awhile, and Rosalie continued to stand behind me staring me down with her icy death glare. Apparently the bitch wasn't going anywhere. Part of me rejoiced silently. It was an excuse to get out of this room and look for Bella. But I knew I had to play this right. Rosalie was already guessing at my interest in Bella and I didn't want her having any part of anything, that may or may not be there between Bella and myself.

I wondered how long I could make Rosalie wait. I had never really thought of her as a patent person, so I didn't think I could push it too far.

Rose huffed behind me. "Fuck it," I shouted, tossing the controller to the ground and standing up. "Ben you want a drink?"

Without looking away from the game on the screen in front of him, he held up a can of Reiner pulled from the six pack beside him, "I'm good."

I ran a hand through my hair as I turned toward Rosalie and raised my eyebrows at her. It was her move. She wrapped an arm around mine, holding it lightly and heading for the still open door.

I swear I felt her before I saw her. As we came down to the first level of the house, midway down the stair case Rosalie's grip tightened on my arm, her step faltered slightly, though it would hardly be evident anyone but me. I turned in the direction of her stare, of the magnetic pull.

From the staircase I could just see into through the open archway into the dining room, where Bella sat perched on my brother's lap at my mother's antique table. There were several other people seated at the table immersed in a card game. It had only been about 15 minutes since Rosalie had came up to my room, and I had no idea how long Bella had been there before Rose had come to me, but it was obvious that Bella had a couple drinks in her. A bottle of Bud Light hung loosely from her hand, her arm draped around my brother's shoulder as she gestured at the cards in his hand.

Emmett threw some cards down on the table. "Social, drink up bitches," Bella gestured around the table and pulled her arm from Emmett, pulling her drink toward her mouth and draining it. "Shit, I'm out." She turned to Mike Newton, who was sitting beside her, shook the bottle at him, "Get me another," she said lightly, batting her eyelashes at him. Mike jumped up,taking the bottle from her and rushed from the room, passing Rosalie and I as we reached the dining room.

Bella had turned to watch Mike exit the room and saw us standing there. "Hey Mikey, get a drink for Edward and his 'friend'," she called after him. Bella's beautiful brown eyes, seemed darker than the last time I'd seen her, and they were drilling into me. The look on her face one of disgust. She dropped her head down to my brother's ear, her mouth moved, her beautiful lips whispering to him. My cock caught notice and I found myself wishing just this once that I was Emmett. Rosalie's grip tightened on my arm bringing me back to myself, as Emmett's laughter filled the room.

Mike returned with beers in hand, handing one first to me then to Rosalie. Looking down at him she sneered, "I don't drink beer."

This brought out another round of laughter, this time from Bella. Her head fell back as the most beautiful sound I ever heard escaped her. I couldn't help but chuckle myself, which brought Rosalie's death glare back to me, I cracked open my beer and took a long swig shrugging in response.

Bella's attention was back at the table, she placed the last card in her hand on the table, "Ha, motherfuckers," she shouted, pointing her finger around the table, "Everybody drink."

A mumble came from Jessica Stanley, as Emmett also played his last card, "Cheaters."

"Fuck you. You don't fucking have to play, drink again. Bitch." Emmett guffawed as Bella tipped in his lap, her words slurring, he caught her when she tipped just a touch too far. Rosalie inhaled sharply at his casual touch of Bella. Bella rose to her feet, swaying slightly and steadying herself on my brother's shoulder, "I have to pee." Emmett pointed down the hall, give her directions to the bathroom. She leaned over him, her low cut shirt gaping slightly and giving a shot of her breasts, Bella was not wearing a bra. "Your in charge while I'm gone." she grinned, Rosalie turned in a huff and walked out of the room. I watched Bella's form retreat down the hallway her hand trailing along the wall, occasionally providing support for her as she stumbled.

Emmett was still quite engrossed in the card game at the table when I pulled out a chair beside him and lowered myself into it. His head rolled toward me, "Hey bro, can't really say I'm surprised to see you down here." I took a pull off my beer and shrugged. Emmett glanced quickly around the room, "Where's she?" I shrugged in answer again, he smiled widely, "You want in next game?" he asked.

"No thanks."

"Lauren, go get me and my brother a beer." Emmett practically shouted. Lauren rolled her eyes and grumbled something under her breath, but got up and left the room, Emmett laughed. He tipped his chair back on it's back legs in a way that would horrify our mother, as he drained the bottle in his hand. "Bella's staying the night," he said in an uncharacteristically low voice.

I closed my eyes tightly, lifted my beer from the table and downed the remaining half of the bottle, grabbing the one from Lauren's hand as I fought back a growl. I was trying to play it cool, but had a feeling I was failing miserably. I still didn't understand my strong feelings about Bella, but my jealousy was definitely getting the better of me tonight, even if I didn't understand where it was coming from. Emmett let out a short breathy laugh. I started to rise out of my seat, my hands clinched in fists, when I heard the sharp click of heels on the hardwood floors behind me.

Turning my head, I saw a flash of blond hair turning from the room. That comment hadn't been for me.


	14. Chapter 14

**a/n- so it's been my goal to update once a week and i think i've done pretty well so far, but i may be updating a little less frequently for a bit. we've got a vacation planned at the beginning of august that i am so looking foward to, and i'm hoping to spend a little time on my other hobby, cake decorating. i wanna enter at least one cake in the fair at the end of this month, so i'm gonna try and do a little concentrating on that. if anyone has any great cake ideas, i'd love to hear those, (there's a link to my cake website on my profile, if you wanna check out what i can do), i'd also LOVE to hear what you think of this story!!!! review, please, do you want me to beg, cause i will. pretty, pretty, pretty please review.**

_BELLA_

"What do you drink?" Emmett asked after helping to free me from the seat of his Jeep.

I climbed down carefully, "What do you got?"

Emmett lead me toward a door in the back of the garage where there was a box sitting. He lifted it off the floor and set it on the workbench, "Whatever you want, Bella." The box held several bottles of liquor and couple of six packs, Emmett was good. "There's more beer in the house too, I just brought this out for you."

"You got shot glasses?" I asked, Emmett nodded placing two shot glasses on the workbench.

He laughed, "I had to pull these out of my dad's office before my mom locked everything down."

I poured us each a shot of Crown, while Emmett cracked us each open a beer as a chaser. "Whiskey, huh?"

Smirking at him,I lifted my glass, "Cheers." I poured the shot down my open throat and swallowing quickly. I poured the next shot after shuddering briefly and taking a sip of my beer. As I watched Emmett grimace swallowing his shot down I let out a short laugh, "So, you're probably not going to be sober enough to take me home." Emmett's eyebrows raised at me as he shrugged, I laughed again. "You have an extra bed, or a couch, or something?"

He nodded, "For you, Bella, anything. I'll get Edward to give me a key."

"What?"

"Edward locks all the rooms to keep everyone out of stuff. It works, less to clean up in the morning. But you Bella, you get a room." Emmett's dimples showed as grinned broadly at me.

"What asses you guys are," I chuckled, pouring us each another shot, Emmett nodded his head in agreement. "Speaking of being an ass, is there a plan for the night?" His eyebrows drew together, as he shot me a perplexed look. "Come on it's all about your jealousy thing now, cause Charlie really doesn't seem too bothered by me being here."

"Bella," Emmett started softly, "I would have invited you anyway."

"Probably, the whole school is going to be here right?" I rolled my eyes, "I wouldn't have gotten a ride or a room, though."

He grinned, "That's true."

I laughed lightly, "Like I said, ass." Emmett shot me his cockiest grin, which only made me laugh harder. "She's gonna be here?" Emmett nodded, and I pulled a cigarette out of my pack, "Where can I smoke?"

"Outside. Sorry." My response was to shrug and pour us each another shot, which we downed quickly. Emmett cracked open another beer for me, then grabbed one for himself, he hid the shot glasses in a cabinet before placing the liquor bottles back in the box. As he carried the box under his arm, I followed him outside through a side door and immediately lit my cigarette. I inhaled deeply the nicotine mixing with the alcohol in my system, creating a pleasant buzzing sensation.

"So?" I asked, Emmett stared at me blankly, "The plan?"

"Are you drunk?"

"Quite possibly," I giggled.

"Damn, your a lightweight."

I gave him a goofy grin."Hey, I'm one shot up on you, and halfway through my second beer. You just opened yours."

He laughed as he crossed his large arms across his chest and eyed me up and down, "Just stick close, that'll be enough." Emmett paused in thought for a moment as I took a drag, and exhaled a cloud of smoke around me. "I wonder if she'll get Edward downstairs."

"Huh?"

"Edward tends to hid out during all the festivities."

I remembered that Emmett's girlfriend would be using Edward to get to Emmett. Fuck these people are fucked up, I hoped they weren't drawing me too far into their twisted little world. Wait, I'm fucked up too. I guess I'd fit into their world pretty well.

"What does she look like?"

"You still haven't met her?" Emmett asked incredulously. I shook my head, "She's tall, blond and will probably be pissed as hell." Emmett laughed.

I finished up my cigarette and the two of us headed toward the house, me stumbling slightly. We came in though a back door, directly into the kitchen, Emmett set the box on a counter in the kitchen, the house was already full of kids, but it was clear that Emmett's arrival was the official start of the party. Whether it was the alcohol he brought with him or simply Emmett, his energy and enthusiasm was infectious and everyone wanted to be near him.

The alcohol was very much affecting me at this point, loosening me up, I felt more comfortable in his strange home immediately, than I had in a week in my old one. I sat beside him on a couch as he excitedly gave the highlights of the evenings earlier football game. He draped an arm across my shoulders, and I lulled my head back on to it.

"Hey Emmett. Bella." came a voice beside me.

"Mikey," I called, not raising my head from Emmett's arm. From my position I spotted a deck of cards on a bookshelf across the room. "Hey, let's play a game," I practically shouted, jumping up and grabbing the cards.

In retrospect, this is probably where the evening went down hill.

About seven of us headed into the Cullen's dining room, taking seats around the table as I explained the game. A short while later I had ended up in Emmett's lap, after falling out of my chair, I'd gotten a little excitable. I finished a beer and sent Mike into the kitchen to get me another, I watched him jump up from the table. I was amazed that he was still so steady on his feet since I could hardly sit up straight and turned to watch him, my head cocked slightly to one side. That's when I saw her for the first time.

Her arm was laced though Edward's and she was nearly as tall as him. She looked like a blond Amazon goddess, easily one of the most beautiful people I'd ever seen close up. And she was wearing red heels, red heels! I thought only Alice wore things like that. The heels matched the red lacy overlay of her tube top, a top which showed just enough cleavage from her ample breasts to give any guys imagination a good start. She also wore a too short denim skirt, well too short for me, as it would have led to an unfortunate incident involving a public showing of my underwear, especially in those heels, but this girl managed to pull it off. Hell she probably wasn't even wearing underwear. And I knew it was her from the eye daggers she was shooting at me.

Emmett was right, this chick was pissed as hell. Though I couldn't believe that she would have fallen for this ruse. Looking at her, and looking at me, there was no comparison, it was obvious who anyone with a penis would prefer.

"Hey Mikey," I shouted, "Get a drink for Edward and his 'friend'." I stared at Edward, not really sure how he could play into this game. What the hell could he get out of it? I really didn't fucking understand that kid and for some reason it was frustrating the shit out of me. I ducked my head down to Emmett's ear, "As they say in one of my all-time favorite movies, 'Bring it'," he laughed.

Mike returned then with drinks in hand, Edward took one and the bitch refused, stating that she didn't drink beer. I couldn't help the laugh that escaped me, of course she didn't. Mike elbowed me lightly, "Your turn Bella."

I placed down my last card and let out a victory laugh, "Ha, motherfuckers. Everybody drink," I gestured around the table. After Emmett played his last card, I attempted to stand up, "I have to pee," I announced. Emmett directed me to the bathroom and I stumbled down the hall in the direction he'd given.

I peed quickly, washed my hands and walked out the door to head back to the dining room. Standing in the hall just outside the door was the blond Amazon. "I think we need to talk," she said coldly.

I leaned my shoulder against the wall, "Do I know you?"

Her eyes narrowed, "Are you fucking with me?"

I righted myself to a stand and took a step forward, ready to walk past her. "Why the hell would I wanna fuck with you?"

"Emmett," she said simply, while positioning her body to block the hallway.

That one step she took, setting her self in my path, pissed me off. "Oh, you know Emmett?" I asked in a voice laden with fake sugary-ness as I took another step toward her, and out of this hallway.

Blondie stood her ground, "Who the fuck do you think you are?" She extended her arm, with her finger outstretched pointing to me, and pushed into my shoulder.

The time bomb that was ticking in me at the the stress of the last week was set off. "Don't fucking touch me."

At this, she thought she had me, she smirked wickedly. She set on hand on my arm, just below my shoulder, "Emmett's mine."

"I told you not to fucking touch me," I said though gritted teeth, though I could hear the level of my voice rising. My arm flew up and knocked her hand loose of me. "I don't know who the fuck you think you are, but you don't touch me."

**EDWARD**

The clicking of Rosalie's heels on the hardwood was unsettling, as was Emmett's low chuckle beside me. I just wanted to see Bella's face once more before I returned to the safety of my room, I was hoping that her face wouldn't have quite so much bitterness and anger in it when I saw her again. I don't know what my brother had been saying to her about me, but I had to figure it wasn't good.

I was wondering how long Bella could be, thinking that she'd be coming up the hall behind me any moment, when I realized quite a few people where headed down the hall in the other direction. That's when I heard female voices getting louder, growling, shouting.

"Oh shit," Emmett laughed, jumping up from his chair and heading down the hall. I trailed after him, followed by several others from the table. Rosalie's back was to us, her blond hair swinging wildly as her hand was knocked free of Bella.

Bella's voice was loud, clear and full of viciousness, "You don't touch me."

I would think that most people would have backed down, just from Bella's tone but not Rosalie, it seemed to entice her. She stepped toward Bella, and as she bent forward I caught a glimpse of Bella face. I had thought she looked angry, disgusted earlier, but that was nothing, Bella's face was twisted into what can only be described as pure rage, I inhaled sharply at the tears that were flowing from her eyes. The tears were what gave Rosalie the impression that Bella was weak, the tears were what made Rosalie continue moving toward Bella, but I had seen her fight back angry tears before that day in the parking lot. Her tears were no sign a weakness.

Rosalie grasped Bella by her arms, just below her shoulders, leaning forward and saying softly, "You don't touch Emmett."

Bella drew in a deep shuddery breath and shut her eyes tightly. Her head dropped. Then quickly rose, eyes open widely now as her arm flew forward, fist extended, pummeling into Rosalie with a dull thud. Rose stumbled backward, her hands at her face. Bella stood in the hallway with a strangely blank look on her face, rubbing the back of her hand in shock.

"What the fuck!" came Rosalie's cry from against the wall.

Bella blinked her eyes rapidly, and looked around her, lost, like she'd just come out of a trance. Her eyes fell to Rosalie, then found Emmett who was standing by Rose's side. Wiping the tears from her face with her good hand, Bella looked at Emmett, her eyes full of shock and apology, "Too much," she whispered.

She simply stood there.

Rosalie and Emmett were whispering fiercely to one another. Lauren ran down the hall to the kitchen getting ice for Rosalie's face, I could hear her telling someone, "That new bitch fucking hit Rosalie." More people were trying to cram themselves into the hallway for a look. The gossip was starting to swirl already, and Bella still hadn't moved. Her face was completely blank.

I stepped forward and pulled Bella under my arm, rushing her up the stairs to my room.


	15. Chapter 15

**a/n**- yeah, i know... i freaking suck. it's been way too long, massive, massive apologizes. twilight it ain't mine and thanks to project team beta, cause my punctuation is atrocious. so i'll let you get to this.

**EDWARD**

I practically carried Bella up the stairs amid the looks and whispers of half the school, ignoring the buzzing sound that filled my ears when I touched her and the vibrating, electric tingle I felt where our bodies touched. Once in my room, I shut the door and locked it behind us. I realized then, that Ben was still there and he'd been joined by Angela Weber; he was attempting to coach her through some game. I let go of Bella near the door. She didn't move, just stood there with that blank look on her face in a daze.

"Hey, dude," Ben yelled over his shoulder, not taking his eyes from the game.

"Hey, Edward," came Angela's soft voice, trailing off as she turned and caught sight of Bella. "Um, hi Bella." It sounded more like a question than a greeting. Ben whipped around in his seat, his eyebrows raised so high they nearly hit his hairline. "Is she OK?" Angela asked softly, as her eyes roamed over Bella's unnaturally still form.

"Uh, yeah." I ran my fingers roughly though my hair, trying to figure out what I should do next. It was like Bella was in shock or something. I had no idea how to handle it. Lay her down? Elevate her feet? Slap her? Nothing seemed right. Pinching the bridge of my nose with one hand, I wrapped my other arm around her waist and led her to my desk along the back wall of my room, pulling out the chair and lowering her into it. Ben and Angela were no longer playing video games. Their eyes were trained on Bella and me. As much as I wanted to tell them to fuck off or mind their own business, I didn't.

"Bella," I whispered to her. There was no response from her, her breath remained steady and even. I set my hands lightly on her forearms, stroking them softly. Her skin was softer than I could have ever imagined, like silk. "Bella."

Suddenly, her chest heaved as she drew in a deep shuddery breath, exhaling slowly, her breath flying into my face. It was the sweet, floral scent that was Bella, mixed with the bitterness of alcohol, and it was the sexiest thing I'd ever experienced. I wanted to press my lips hard onto hers, plunge my tongue deep into her mouth and taste her, have her face so close to me that hers was the only scent I could smell. My eyes closed and I found my body moving involuntarily toward hers.

At her sharp inhale, my eyes flew open; I jerked my body back up. What the fuck was going on with me?

Bella's arms crossed her chest and she lightly rubbed her upper arms where Rosalie had grabbed her earlier. Her eyes were roaming the room around her. She looked lost, confused... scared. I spoke softly. "Are you alright?"

She dropped her hands from her arms, one catching a chain around her neck and hanging there as the other she pulled tight to her stomach. Nodding her head, she answered, "My hand hurts." Her eyebrows rose, as if she were asking a question.

"I'll bet," I chuckled lightly. "Hey Ben, check the fridge for something cold," I said over my shoulder. Ben, whose eyes were still fixed on Bella and me, jumped up quickly, scurrying to the mini-fridge beside my television. He jogged over to me with a can of Coke, looking between Bella and me, his eyes full of unasked questions. I shot him a sharp glance, hoping that he'd keep his mouth shut; I'm sure I wanted to know some of the same things that Ben did, but, he had a tendency to lack tact. "Thanks." Ben nodded and retreated to his spot on the couch. I lightly grasped Bella's arm from her middle and pulled it toward me, gently placing the can against her knuckles as I supported her hand in one of mine.

I looked up at her face, my eyes meeting hers and becoming hopelessly lost in them as electricity flowed between us. The vibrating sensation and buzzing sound overwhelmed me, and I let it.

"So," came Ben's voice, but it sounded so far away and I found myself swimming back to reality. Apparently, he wasn't going to keep his mouth shut.

"Huh?" I didn't take my eyes from Bella, though. I couldn't let myself lose the connection.

"What happened?"

Bella's fist around the chain clenched, then released. She lowered the hand placing it on the Coke can, taking it from me and pulling her hand from mine. _Damn you, Ben_.

"Yeah. What happened?" Bella asked in a soft whisper.

I ran my hand through my hair, while I considered this, I really didn't understand what had happened. "You decked Rosalie Hale," I answered, it was the only thing I was certain about.

Angela gasped, and let out a short, breathy laugh. "What?" Ben shouted.

"Who?" Realization dawned on Bella's face, as her eyes sparked with a childish glint. "Is that the bitch's name?" she asked, a smirk appearing on her face. Bella laughed heartily, head falling forward into her lap. "Bitch had it coming," she slurred, as she jabbed a finger in the air and rocked unsteadily on the chair. A grimace crossed over her face. "Ouch," she giggled, placing the can back on her knuckles, a smile playing lightly on her lips.

I didn't want to press the issue, but I was curious as to what had possessed her to punch Rosalie. If I thought about it, I could come up with millions of reasons for someone to hit Rosalie, but Bella hardly knew her. In the end I didn't have to ask.

"What the hell happened down there?" Ben asked. He was now sitting on his knees on my couch, his elbows resting on the armrest. He looked like a kid on Christmas morning, eager to open his gifts. "What happened?" he reiterated. This time he directed his question to Bella.

The dazed look was creeping back onto Bella's face. "She just...she grabbed me." Bella's mouth hung open like she was going to say more but the words never came.

Ben began to open his mouth, and I shot him a look to say 'don't you fucking dare.' Thankfully, this time, he understood.

"You need anything, Bella?" I asked. She shook her head lightly, before tipping her head slightly to look around me. Ben had turned back toward Angela and the video game; he'd picked up the controller but they weren't playing. I knew Ben well enough to know he was trying to eavesdrop.

"I don't really know what happened," she said softly, her eyes pleading with me. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to start breaking the events down for her or not. I glanced down at her injured hand. When I looked back up, her eyes were no longer warm and open, instead they were cold and hard. My hands tugged roughly at the hair that was falling into my face. I did not know how to handle this girl. "Why'd you bring me up here?"

"I... I just thought that," I stammered, pausing to consider my words. "I just thought, that maybe, you might need a break, from the party and stuff."

"Whatever." Her head lolled back as she closed her eyes and breathed deeply, slow and steady breaths continuing to enter and exit her body. I stood from the uncomfortable crouch I'd been holding beside the desk chair, taking a few steps to stretch out my legs before talking a seat on the desktop.

It was quiet in the room for a moment, and then there was a knock at my bedroom door. Bella's eyes opened slowly and rolled toward the door as whoever was outside continued to knock, she shot me a pointed look.

I smiled at her. "I'm not answering it."

She let out an exasperated sigh and shrugged. "It's your room."

The knocking continued, now accompanied by the voice of Tyler Crowley. "Hey, is that chick in there with you?"

"Fuck off!" I yelled.

"Dude, I just wanna congratulate her."

"Fuck off!"

"Whatever, you can't keep her to yourself forever." There was one last pound on the door and then the room was quiet again.

I looked at Bella; her head was again tipped back on the chair, legs outstretched in front of her and her hands over her eyes. I watched her soft and steady breathing, her small, delicate chest rising and falling. Her hair fell back away from her face, revealing her thin neck, and through her pale skin, I could see the rhythm of the pulse in her veins. My eyes closed as I took a deep breath, trying not to be obvious about attempting to inhale her scent. Tyler Crowley had hit on exactly what I wanted to do: keep Bella to myself, forever.

I was fascinated when she began to snore softly. Sitting up straighter, I leaned toward her. I didn't know how long I'd been sitting there watching her, but Angela pulled me out of my trance.

"Bye, Edward," she called, her hand already on the door knob and Ben standing behind her.

I shook my head lightly, trying to clear thoughts of Bella from my mind. _Fuck, how long have they been standing there?_ My face felt hot with embarrassment. "You guys are going?"

"Yeah, it's almost my curfew. I'm gonna take Ben home." He grinned sheepishly behind her.

I avoided eye contact with both of them. "See ya."

The two of them walked out the door, shutting it behind them, leaving me alone in the room with Bella Swan. I ran my fingers though my hair, several minutes passing slowly before I decided couldn't let her spend the night like that on my desk chair.

I shook her shoulder lightly, whispering her name.

Her head rolled to the left and her hands dropped from her eyes to the right side of her neck. I noticed then that a couple of the knuckles on her right hand were beginning to bruise. I chuckled lightly to myself at the thought of Rosalie's face right now.

I stood up, considering my options for moving sleeping Bella from the desk chair without disturbing her. It didn't really seem possible. Softly, I whispered her name again, still getting no response. I lightly rubbed circles on the back of her good hand, and called out her name again: still nothing. I stood up straight again, not sure what to do. There was no way I could leave her in that chair all night. I just couldn't.

"Edward."

I jumped at the sound of my name, my head swinging around to locate the source.

There was a short rap at the door and my name was called again.

Emmett.

Taking another long look at Bella I headed to the door.

I undid the lock before opening the door just enough to slip out, then shut it behind me. "What?" I hissed at my brother.

"Is she still here?"

I slowly nodded once at him, my eyes narrowed. _The fucking nerve._ He'd been quick as hell to run for Rosalie. He didn't question or worry about Bella one bit, when it was Rose who started the whole thing. Then, after nearly two hours had passed, what the hell did he want? To tell Bella that he had chosen Rose? That he never really cared about her? _That's not happening tonight. Sorry, bro._

"Is she OK? Can I talk to her?"

I shook my head, "She's asleep. She's fine." I started to turn back toward the door, placing my hand on the doorknob. Emmett still had yet to move back down the hallway. I turned back; he had a half-smile plastered on his face and one eyebrow quirked in a look that said, _I'm on to you_. "What?"

"Are you letting her stay in your room?" There was a hint of amusement present in his voice.

"Yeah. Why?"

"Just making sure she's got a place to sleep, like I told her I would." I turned back to the door. "Hey, tell her I'll call her tomorrow." He called out with a grin in his voice.

I pivoted on my heel. "What the fuck, Em?"

"What? Things got out of hand tonight. You said I can't talk to her now, so I'll apologize tomorrow."

That fucking 'know it all' grin was on his face again and I wanted nothing more than to beat it off of him. "Things got out of hand?" I roared, turning and opening the door. "Fuck off." I could hear Emmett's laughter in the hall as I slammed the door shut, locking it again.

Bella stirred in the chair and I quickly crossed the room to her. "Hey, Bella," I said in a voice just slightly above a whisper.

Her eyelids fluttered and she rolled her shoulders up in a stretch before opening her eyes. The beautiful chocolate pools opened and she focused on me. "Edward?" Confusion was evident in her voice, which was slightly rough and gravely from sleep and alcohol.

"Um... Hey, you can take my bed for the night. I'll sleep on the couch." Her eyes had closed again and her head was back."Bella?"

I placed my hands under her arms and pulled her up from the chair She groaned and half opened her eyes as I led her over to the bed, where she flopped backward and kicked off her shoes. "Hmm... it's soft." She sighed. I couldn't help but smile at the sight of Bella sprawled across my bed, her hair fanned out, arms flung above her head.

She squirmed around a bit and then lowered her arms, placing her hands on the waistband of her jeans and she began undoing the button. I turned my head quickly, knowing I shouldn't see this; she was drunk it was taking advantage to watch her undress. She was undressing? "Um, what are you doing?" I asked over my shoulder.

"I'm not sleeping in these jeans." She stated, shaking her head, as if it was the most normal, obvious thing in the world to strip down in an acquaintance's bed.

"Um, do you want something to wear? Sweats?" I spoke my question quickly, words falling out in a rush as I scurried over to my closet to find her something, anything to wear.

"'S kinda warm for sweats," she slurred.

I rummaged around in my drawers, pulling out a pair of running shorts and a Forks High Baseball tee shirt and walking back toward the bed. I saw her jeans lying on the floor beside the bed and my dick went hard. My eyes squeezed tightly shut before I did the inevitable and looked. The air exited my lungs in a soft hiss, as I swept my eyes up over her bare legs. I tossed the clothes onto the bed beside her. "I grabbed you a shirt too." My voice was low, near a whisper and more raspy than I intended.

I cleared my throat, my eyes still glued to Bella as she pulled my shorts up over her thighs, covering the pink cotton panties she was wearing. Bella looked at me. It hadn't been my intention to draw attention to myself, just clear the lust from my voice and now I was caught staring at her as she dressed. I tipped my head back quickly, looking at the ceiling. Bella giggled. She was laughing at me. Of course she was laughing at me; I couldn't blame her.

Bella pulled the light sweater she was wearing loose from her arms, taking it off before tossing her body back again. I turned my eyes on her again, trying to memorize the image of her lying on my bed with her eyes closed. Tomorrow my sheets and pillows would smell like Bella Swan. I inhaled deeply at the thought of lying in those sheets. In my mind, I pictured spending the rest of the weekend in that bed. I wondered how long the scent would remain, how long I could keep my mother from washing them. I wondered when I'd turned into a pathetic pussy.

The tank top that Bella left on instead of putting on my tee shirt was fitted and clung slightly to her body. My eyes ran over her, tracing every inch: from the subtle curve of her legs, up to the fullness of her chest and finally the soft perfection of her face. The light regular breathing that came from her told me she was already asleep again, her right hand with the bruised, swollen knuckles splayed across her face. The other was fisted on her stomach. As my gazed continued up her arm I noticed the bruises where Rose had grabbed her. I didn't know why the idea that Rosalie had hurt Bella pissed me off, but it did. I moved closer to the bed to see better, the damage Rose had done to Bella.

While some of the bruising may have been from tonight, there was no way all of it was. The shades of green and brown mixed with the blue and purple, made it obvious that some of the bruises were older, fading. _What the hell had happened? _

I stumbled back as Bella stirred, tossing her left hand up over her right, across her face. A quiet laugh escaped me as I watched Bella sleep with her face buried in her hands. I headed for my bathroom to get myself ready for bed, pulling on a pair of running shorts as well. Bella was right; it was too warm in here for sweats. I would have just slept in my boxers, but with Bella here that seemed awkward. I went out to the linen closet in the hall and grabbed an extra blanket and pillow, then attempted to settle myself on the couch.

It was just after one when a phone started ringing in my room. I figured it was probably Bella's and went in search of her jeans. The caller ID said Chief Charlie. I smiled before I answered it.

"Hello?"

"Who's this? Where's Bella at?" Chief Swan sounded gruff and slightly frantic.

"Um, this is Edward Cullen. Bella is sleeping, sir." I was using that super polite voice that Esme insisted upon when speaking to anyone of authority.

I could hear the chief exhale and I held my own breath, waiting for him to chew me out. "Okay. If she's okay there, I'll be by at a quarter to eight to pick her up."

His demeanor confused me. He sounded relaxed, relieved, not irate as I assumed he would have been at the thought of his only daughter overnighting with some boy. "She's- she's fine." I stumbled. "I can bring her home, sir. If you want?"

Chief Swan was quiet for a moment. "Edward, huh?"

"Yes, sir."

"Alright. She has to be at the school at eight. Can you have her there?"

"Yes, sir."

"And that's not an inconvenience to you?"

"No, sir."

He sighed. "Alrighty then. I'll see you in the morning."

"Yes, sir." When I hung up Bella's phone, I looked over to the bed. For a split second I wondered where she was. The only sign of her was a small lump in the center of the bed. She had pulled herself into a ball and was completely covered with my blankets. I headed to the couch, flipped on CNN and laid down.

Suddenly, I could smell her again. I could feel the pull her body had on mine. She was right there, standing next to me. I didn't know why she was there, I didn't care and I couldn't stop myself. I reached my hand out to her, tangling my fingers in her mass of mahogany hair and pulling her toward me. I moved myself closer, inhaling her delicate scent deeply before brushing my lips against hers. Her deep brown eyes grew wide. I pulled back, ever so slightly, waiting for a sign. Her lids lowered and a slight lift appeared in the corners of her mouth. This was all the go ahead I needed; I pressed my lips to hers again, more firmly this time.

Bella's perfect rose petal lips yielded under mine and parted gently; breath flowed between us, the air that was distinctly Bella mingling with mine. I gently pushed my tongue into her mouth, my desire to taste Bella about to be realized. Her lips, touching mine, parted further, then she pulled away suddenly, turning and walking away from me.

"Bella," I called after her.

She let out a soft laugh and kept walking.

I closed my eyes, not wanting to watch her walk away. When they fluttered back open, I glanced around the room. Bella was still barely visible in a ball on my bed, the soft sounds escaping her muted by the blankets over her head. It had all been a dream. Of course it had. The disappointment I felt as that realization sunk in, was all too real.

**a/n-** so?

um... let's see i had some other stuff i was gonna say to ya'll... ok, i'm not gonna say that it's never gonna take that long for an update, cause i hate to make promises i might not be able to keep- but really it shouldn't ever take that long for an update. i know some of you are anxious for e and b to get together, and it's gonna happen but they've both got a bit to go before they are ready for that. trust me. i tried to make it happen faster and the two of them weren't going for it. i had about 3 chapters after this written, then i wrote another couple of chapters where tried getting them together sooner- and there's some good stuff in those chapters even though a lot of it didn't work, so now i have to pull out the good stuff and combine it with what i had. then i have some later chapters started (where, yes, they are together) so have to fill into to those and finish them up... but i have been working on this story and will continue to, i have the story in my head and i want to see it through to the end (i'd make it my new years resolution, but those usually fail and i really do want to do this). hope some of you feel the same way and i hope you enjoyed this chapter. let me know.

hey, if you're interested i'm getting myself set up on twitter, right now my account is attached to my website so my name on there is iheartcakegf but i think i might change that- but you can follow me there and i can let you know how updates are coming.


	16. Chapter 16

**a/n- still don't own twilight**

_BELLA_

An annoying beeping sound was coming from somewhere, but I couldn't bring myself to locate it and make it stop. I was surrounded by a wonderful smell and a softness that I was fully aware wasn't my bed at Charlie's house, and my fuzzy brain didn't care.

The dull ache in my head told me I had either drank too much or not enough. I was leaning toward the latter, since I wasn't puking. Shifting slightly, I groaned; my fucking hand hurt. I stretched out before inspecting it, my hand pushing the sheets up over my head. _Holy fuck._ My knuckles were bruised and swollen, as I spread my fingers out though I was pretty sure no bones were broken.

"Bella?" came a male voice.

I realized that the beeping had stopped. As I pulled the blankets off my face, I begrudgingly exited my sleep cocoon. The blinds were drawn, leaving it somewhat dark in the room, something I was grateful for as I rolled to my side and propped myself up on my elbow to find out who had called out to me. My eyes skimmed around the room, landing on the long, lean figure of Edward Cullen. He was framed in the light from a doorway on the far side of the room. His chest was bare, and my breath caught as my eyes ran over the perfectly formed muscles of his chest, then down to his tight abs and the light reddish hair forming a line from just below his belly button downward. He pulled his shirt on, blocking my view. When I looked back up at him, a slightly crooked grin graced his face. His hair was messier than usual, knotted up from sleep. He ran his hands through it in an attempt to tame it.

I quickly made to get up out and as I lifted my body further off the bed, the nausea hit. _Okay, I definitely drank too much._

Slowly, I lowered my head back down onto the soft pillows, closing my eyes and groaning loudly. I scooted my body toward the edge of the bed and threw my feet down to the floor in an effort to stop the room from spinning.

I heard a soft chuckle escape Edward. "How're you feeling?"

I limply lifted my uninjured hand, with one choice finger raised then let my hand drop back down beside me on the bed. "What time is it?"

"Seven-thirty."

I groaned again. "Shit, I didn't call my dad last night."

"Don't worry, he called. I said I'd drive you to school. Why are you going to school on a Saturday, anyway?"

"You answered my phone?" I croaked loudly. It probably would have been a yell if my voice wasn't still scratchy from drinking the previous night.

Edward looked completely caught off guard by my anger. How the hell he could expect anyone to not be pissed off is beyond me. I would have been pissed at anyone who answered my phone without my knowledge, and I barely fucking knew him- it was fucking presumptive.

He looked down at his feet before answering. "Um, yeah. You were out cold, and it was your dad. I," his voice dropped. "I didn't want him to worry."

I groaned again.

"Um, should we get going?"

After I quickly cleaned myself up, Edward loaned me a sweatshirt and the two of us headed out to the garage and climbed into Edward's shiny Volvo. Little was said between us on the drive to the school. We really didn't know each other and I wasn't really sure as to how much I'd embarrassed myself night before. Honestly, I didn't want to know, so I figured it was best to keep my mouth shut. Maybe he wouldn't feel compelled to tell me.

When we pulled into the school's parking lot, Charlie was there standing alongside his cruiser. As Edward put his Volvo in park, I swung open the door and stepped out. I assumed that Edward would back out as soon as I got out but instead he turned off the ignition and came around to the front of the car with a strange look on his face.

"Mornin' Bells," Charlie called as we approached, nodding to Edward he greeted him as well.

"Good morning, Chief." Edward extended his arm to my father, shaking his hand formally.

I couldn't help but scoff, which caused laughter to light in Charlie's eyes. The corners of Edward's mouth had turned down slightly when Charlie spoke. "Thanks for taking care of my girl."

My skin flashed hot, as my blush rose. I could feel the sincerity in Charlie's voice, and it struck me to my core. His unconditional love for me was evident yet again and it caused my stomach to churn.I had never done anything to deserve it. In fact, in the last few years, I'm sure I'd only done the opposite.

My hangover had caused me to zone out, when I heard Charlie say that Edward should join us for dinner one night.

"You could think of it as a thank you," Charlie nodded as he spoke.

My mouth fell open. Panic and shock had to be evident on my face. There were no words to describe my horror. My mouth was still hanging open when Edward spoke.

"Of course, sir. That would be great. Thank you."

The crooked smirk he shot at me told me that he was enjoying my obvious discomfort.

Edward said goodbye before he climbed back into his Volvo and drove off. Charlie pulled a white plastic bag from the backseat of his cruiser and set it on top of the roof, then handed me a cup of coffee.

"So, how was your night, Bella?" Charlie asked with one eyebrow raised, his eyes locked on mine. "You'll call next time," he added in an authoritative 'dad' voice that I just wasn't used to.

I raised my shoulders slightly to shrug but quickly dropped them as I decided against it; I opted for a subtle nod instead.

"Well, let's get on with our day, Bella." Grabbing his own cup of coffee and the bag, he headed up the steps toward the school.

"Can I have a smoke first?" I mumbled with a smirk.

"Ha, very funny, Bells."

The two of us headed into a small, windowless conference room off the main building. The room held a rectangular table, a few chairs and a cart with a TV and DVD player. He set the bag down and pulled out two Styrofoam trays and a couple sets of plastic utensils.

"Have a seat." Charlie gestured to the table in front of him. I flopped down into a chair. "Since it's just you and me, I brought breakfast."

I could tell by the smell wafting from the container that Charlie had not made this meal himself, and I thanked whatever was out there for that. Housed snugly in the warm, white containers was the Holy Grail of breakfast- pancakes, hash browns, bacon. It was all the grease and starch one needs to fortify themselves after a night of drinking. In that moment, Charlie was the most wonderful man on the planet Earth. I sighed and hummed contentedly as I took my first bite, and Charlie started up the DVD player.

The torture to which I was subjected commenced: movies played with brief interruptions by Charlie to reiterate the health dangers of smoking. I managed to stay awake and maintain a straight face through most of it. Around 11, my stomach started growling slightly; by noon it was loud and out of control.

Charlie laughed. "Hungry, Bella? We've got two more sections on the DVD, then we can get out of here. Shouldn't take too long. I'll treat you to lunch?"

I shrugged in agreement, though I wasn't quite sure if it was a good idea or not.

Fifteen minutes later, Charlie turned off the DVD player. After he filed out some paperwork, he locked up and we climbed into his cruiser. We stopped at the diner, where he ran in and picked up sandwiches to go. I didn't question why we weren't eating there, and I probably should have. My nerves hit as he pointed the vehicle out of town, instead of toward his house. I bit down softly on my lip, but I still didn't say anything. About a mile out of town, we turned off the highway and I could feel sweat beginning to form at my hairline.

I didn't want to go where he was headed. I couldn't go there. I knew as soon as I was back in Forks that I would have to go eventually, but I didn't want Charlie to know how much I was dreading this moment. "Where are we going?" I asked. My voice betrayed me with its shaking.

"I thought maybe we'd have lunch with Jake." Charlie's voice was soft.

My teeth clenched down on my lip painfully as my heart rate increased and tears welled up in my eyes. I shook my head. "Dad, no. Please. I can't."

His eyes, so like mine, fell on me and I found it hard to breathe. My tears broke over the dam when I saw the disappointment.

Disappointment. Always disappointment.

I wiped furiously at my face, attempting deep breaths to try and pull myself back from the brink of a full-fledged panic attack. Visiting Jacob was something I just didn't understand. Charlie went at least once a week, every Sunday after fishing. I never saw the point. I had my memories and that was enough.

"Please," I gasped, tears still rolling down my face. "Please."

Charlie pulled the cruiser over to the side of the road and set it into park, and heaved a huge sigh. His mouth was set in a tight line as he stared out straight ahead.

We sat there on the side of the road. Charlie's gaze was fixed somewhere ahead of us as I fought to control my breathing and stop my tears for what seemed to me like hours. I flung open the door of the cruiser, just before my stomach heaved and its contents exited my body. It continued beyond the point of empty, and dry heaves wracked my body.

Next thing I knew, Charlie's hand was on my shoulder rubbing light circles. He offered me a bottle of water and a towel as the gagging slowed.

"Sorry," I mumbled, my head still hanging down and my eyes glued to the ground. I couldn't look at him. The risk making eye contact was too high, I was trying to gain control of my thoughts and get myself back into the safe little bubble I had been in before- Charlie would be my undoing.

He gave a soft grunt as I sunk back into car seat. A moment later he was in the seat beside, me pulling his door shut. I took that as my cue to do the same. Without saying a word, he started the car back up and pointed us toward Forks.

He didn't have to say anything for me to know he was disappointed. I knew from the sigh he let out when he pushed on the gas pedal, and from the stiffness of his posture. I knew it because I always disappointed him. I had let his demeanor the last few days fool me. The loving way he spoke, the secrets he had shared-- had lulled me into thinking maybe I could do something other than fail him. But I was wrong.

We returned to the house without speaking. The only sounds were my sniffles and shaky breaths as I continued to calm myself. I climbed out of the car as soon as he set it in park. As I walked around the front, Charlie rolled down his window.

"I'm gonna head over to the station for a bit, check on things," he said softly, handing me a bag of food. He didn't even look up and meet my eyes.

I shrugged slightly and gave a quick nod as I reached with a trembling hand for the bag. "I'm sorry," I whispered once more before turning and high-tailing it for the front door.

It was six before Charlie returned. I was sitting on the front porch, chain-smoking again, and quickly made to snuff out my cigarette and ran upstairs. I wasn't quick enough, though.

"So, I guess those movies didn't have too much effect on ya, huh?" Charlie shouted as he opened the cruiser's door.

I froze in place on the porch, my hand resting on the doorknob. Sighing deeply, I turned and simply raised my eyebrows in response.

"Look Bells, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have sprung that on you," Charlie said as he reached the front steps.

I ran a hand over my face and looked anywhere but Charlie's eyes.

"I'd like you to go visit Jake, but I should have asked. I can't make you go."

I shrugged, not wanting to talk about Jake. I said softly, "Dinner's ready."

The two of us headed in and sat down to the fish tacos I had made. As was becoming the norm for us, dinner was quiet, though it seemed tonight was quieter than usual. After we finished eating, Charlie began cleaning the table. He was standing at the sink to do the dishes when I started up the stairs.

"Did you call your mom yet?" he asked over his shoulder.

I shut my eyes tightly. "Yeah," I breathed out.

I didn't need to see him. I could hear the smile in his voice when he spoke. "Good."

Maybe I'm a conspiracy theorist, but I couldn't help but wonder if that was his plan.

It wasn't mine. I had tried to call Alice first, but it kept going straight to voicemail. For the second time in just a few days, I realized that I really had no one. I had called my mom because, really, she was the only other person I could.

When I finally gave in and called her, I couldn't remember why I had put it off for so long. Renee was like a kid sometimes; every day was a new day and things were so easily forgiven. She was my mom and she loved me unconditionally. And she knew everything. It was so hard to start over with new people, since you had to tell them all the ugly things- the things you never wanted to rehash.

EDWARD

Sunday morning I was lucky enough to get to clean up after another night of Emmett and half the idiots of Forks High partying at my house. I was in a foul fucking mood anyway, and this wasn't helping. But Esme would be home the next morning, and I still had homework to do.

Everything was pissing me off, but none of this was the reason. The root of my bad mood, I guessed, was Bella. There was just something about her that confused the hell out of me and left me tied up in knots. I hadn't expected her to be there last night. After what happened Friday night, why would she? But I couldn't help but hope a little bit that she might show or maybe call. It was stupid of me to be disappointed, but I was.

I dropped a glass into the sink, probably a little too hard, and it shattered.

"Fuck," I growled.

Pulling the trash can out, I began picking pieces of glass out of the sink. I was still grumbling to myself when my phone rang.

"Hello?" I answered the phone louder and harsher than was necessary. _Fuck, I need to get myself under control._

"Um, hi," came a soft female voice.

_Bella? Why the hell was she calling?_I wasn't sure what to say, so I said nothing.

"Hello?" Bella asked in a tentative voice.

"Hi, yeah," I stammered.

"Edward?" She was beginning to sound frustrated.

"Yeah?" _Why the hell did that just come out like a question?_ I shook my head.

"Hi, it's Bella. Charlie told me to call and ask you to dinner," she said flatly. "You can totally say no."

I couldn't help but smile; it was obvious she really wanted me to say no. I attempted to conceal my enjoyment as I asked when dinner would be.

She huffed out a huge sigh. "Tonight, six-thirty," she answered. "Are you coming?"

"Yeah, I'll be there." Then the manners my mother instilled in me kicked in. "Can I bring anything?" I blurted out.

Bella snorted and I felt like a fool. "No," she laughed. "I've got it under control. I guess I'll see you later."

"Yeah." I pinched the bridge of my nose as I tried to come up with something, anything, better to say. Unfortunately, I came up blank. "Bye," stated, louder than I meant to.

Bella didn't respond. She'd already hung up.

I pulled up to the Swan house just before six-thirty, empty-handed. If Esme had been home, she would have insisted I take something anyway, and I really tried to come up with something, but I couldn't.

After standing on the step and checking my watch once more, it was now six-thirty on the dot; I knocked. I could hear muffled words from inside the house, but a few moments passed and no one answered. Briefly, I wondered if Bella had called me as a joke. I raised my hand to knock again, but when I heard the door knob rattle, I dropped it quickly.

Bella pulled open the door with a scowl on her face, which was quickly replaced with a forced smile. "Come in, Edward," she said with fake sweetness through gritted teeth.

I followed her into the entry way of the house. After I hung up my coat, she pointed me into the living room where the chief was sitting while she disappeared into the kitchen.

The Swans' house was small, but comfortable- homey. Chief Swan was sitting on the couch with his feet on the coffee table watching the Mariners play on a huge flat screen. He greeted me without looking away from the game as I took a seat in the recliner. My eyes wandered around the small room, finding lots of mementos of Bella's childhood: artwork, certificates, pictures. Pictures of a young Bella smiling happily, many of her and a boy about the same age. Then I realized there were many of the boy by himself, too. I leaned slightly in my chair to get a better look at one of the boy decked out in pads and an football uniform on a end table beside me.

"Dinner's ready."

Bella's voice in the doorway caused me to jump. I looked up, my curious eyes catching hers. After looking in the direction my gaze, her eyes fell to the floor while she gnawed on her lower lip. She looked on the verge of tears before turning quickly back to the kitchen.

We sat down to lasagna, salad and garlic bread at a small table tucked away in one corner of the Swans' kitchen.

"Smells great, Bells," Charlie said appreciatively.

"You made dinner?" I asked.

Bella scowled at me as she nodded. I had earned that, the way I had asked my question. I'm sure I sounded much more incredulous than was polite.

"Bella has been doing most of the cooking around here. I'm not so handy in the kitchen."

A soft laugh escaped Bella. "That's an understatement."

It was amazing to me how Bella could go from hot to cold so quickly. Unfortunately it seemed that most of the negativity was directed at me. Charlie and Bella were fairly quiet as they ate, which from what I knew of Bella didn't surprise me. But they did occasionally make what seemed to be inside jokes.

After we finished eating, Charlie shooed Bella and me into the living room while he cleaned up. The two of them worked as a pair so well even though they hadn't been living together for long. Watching them, I was completely jealous. I wanted things to flow so easily between Bella and me.

I followed a reluctant Bella into the living room where we sat quietly, me back in the recliner and her on the couch. With Charlie out of the room, the quiet was awkward.

"Dinner was good," I said, attempting to fill the silence.

Bella shrugged and mumbled, "Thanks."

Then we were plunged back in the awkwardness again. I struggled to come up with something, anything to say to her. "Um, did you have fun the other night?" I finally blurted out.

Bella breathed a short laugh. "I don't know. From what I remember I'd say... maybe?"

"How's your hand?"

She rolled her eyes then held it, out fingers extended.

"It's nothing compared to Rosalie's face," I told her.

Bella's face lit in a smile that struck me dumb. "Really?"

I couldn't speak, so I nodded, weakly in response.

"She did have it coming."

The two of us fell back into the uncomfortable silence, and my eyes wandered back to the picture in the frame beside me. "Who's this?" I asked.

Bella's eyes focused on the picture and her lips briefly formed a tight line. Then she gave a little half smile and her eyes became watery. "Jake," she said softly.


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N- **thanks to PTB you can read this without my glaring grammar issues- it's bad trust me and they clean up my messes, so yay!

BELLA

I knew it was coming from the second Charlie had invited him to dinner. I knew it.

Before dinner, I'd walked into the living room and found Edward looking at a picture of Jacob. I knew he'd ask; Edward's family hadn't been in Forks long enough for him to have known Jake. I was hoping maybe he'd ask Charlie, but of course he didn't. After dinner, Charlie pushed the two of us out of the kitchen. I was stuck sitting in the room I'd been avoiding since yesterday-- the room filled with memories and pictures and a boy who didn't have any idea.

I refused to look at Edward; hoping, maybe, he'd get the hint that I didn't want to talk to him.

He didn't.

After trying half-heartedly to start a conversation with me, his eyes wandered back over to a framed photo. It was the one of Jake smiling widely in his football uniform, helmet tucked under his arm, the summer before seventh grade.

"Who's this?" he asked, jutting his angular jaw in the direction of the picture.

I trained my eyes on the photo, and I couldn't help the smile that crossed my lips as I remembered how excited Jake had been about the start of his first football season. I also couldn't help the tears that sprang to my eyes like they always did when I thought of him.

"Jake," I said softly, my voice quaking slightly. "My brother."

"Oh." His brows furrowed. "I didn't know you had a brother." He spoke softly and shock was evident in Edward's voice. "Is he... is he still in Phoenix?"

My eyes fell on another picture frame; a small one, directly above the television-- two sleeping babies wrapped tightly in blankets and shoved close together, the larger one in a blue cap, the smaller one in pink. I stared at the picture as my teeth sunk into to my lower lip and chills coursed through my body.

"He... he's gone," my voice was barely a whisper as I spoke. "He died."

The feelings I'd been struggling to avoid since moving here surfaced; honestly, I'd been trying to avoid them for much longer than that. The weight that had begun to descend on me yesterday, when I realized Charlie was driving us toward the cemetery, was crushing me. Air caught in my throat and I struggled to breath.

There was so much I refused to deal with.

I had blocked out all emotion. I always managed to keep away the utter emptiness that was my loss- the part of me that was completely gone and the guilt I held. Fear of all those feelings had kept me away from Forks, and as I looked at it now, separated me from Charlie, who needed me. I had cried, sure, but it was because the slightest hint of my guilt sent me into a panic attack.

I'm pretty sure that Edward said something to me, but I couldn't understand his words. My ears were filled with a buzzing noise, blocking out all but my shuddering, uneven breaths. In that moment I was completely alone, and I let it all out.

I don't know how long I cried, how long I was only aware of my own feelings of emptiness. I'm not sure how long I blocked everything else out. After a while, I became aware of Charlie's arms around me, rubbing my back as he whispered "shh" over and over again into my hair.

"Bella?" came a shout from somewhere. "What the hell is going on in here? What'd you do? Is she okay?"

_Charlie? _

Abruptly, I pulled back, placing my hands on the chest of the person whose arms I was in. There sat Edward, his shirt soaked in my tears and snot, his hands still clinging to my shoulders. I pulled in deep, shaky breaths, embarrassed that this had been the moment I finally felt all the grief of losing my brother- now, with this boy who was practically a stranger.

Jumping up, I bolted up the stairs, slammed the door to my room and locked it behind me.

I collapsed onto my bed, a swirl of sadness and embarrassment encompassing me as I was racked with sobs again.

Pounding on the door awakened me once again. It was Monday morning and light was faintly filtering in through my window.

_Perfect, another gray Forks day to suit my mood_.

I rolled myself out of bed and shuffled over to the door. Unlocking it, I pushed past Charlie, who was still standing in the hall, as I made my way to the shower.

"You OK, Bells?" he asked softly.

I shrugged as I opened the bathroom door.

"You wanna talk about it?"

"No," I answered as I shut the door.

"I'll see you tonight, hon. Call me if you need me." Charlie's worried voice carried from behind the closed door.

He had checked on me several times last night and tried to get me to talk to him, but I had no idea what to say or where to begin. It had been four years since Jacob's death and I'd avoided talking about it with anyone, especially Charlie and Renee. Hell, I avoided even thinking about him.

Jacob was always the favorite. He was so much like Renee, spontaneous and outgoing, where I was cautious and reserved. To Charlie, who had always missed Renee, I'm sure it reminded him of her to have Jacob around. While I was always too much like Charlie, I'm sure I could only remind him of the places he had failed with the disappointment I brought. For Renee, Jacob was her partner in crime; he was always up for any wacky idea that she came up with, while I was never daring enough or willing to give into her whims.

Regardless of the differences between us, Jacob was part of me. With only seven minutes separating us, how could he not be?

I showered slowly, figuring that this would be the best part of my day.

When I finally got to school, it was minutes before the first bell. The parking lot was full, so I pulled into the only available spot I could find-- one spot over from Edward's silver Volvo. Thankfully, he was no longer in it.

EDWARD

Last night had possibly been the strangest night I'd ever had. After Bella had tore up the stairs, Charlie had shuffled me to the door. He'd stammered out apologies, explaining little. "She's been through a lot lately," he'd said, shaking his head sadly. Mumbling, almost to himself, he added, "probably shouldn't have done this."

When I arrived home, my shirt still damp with Bella's tears, I did the most crazy, stalker-ish thing ever. I settled on my bed, wrapping myself in sheets that still smelled of Bella, and pulled out my laptop. Then, I Googled Jacob Swan.

It got me more results than I had expected. I added Phoenix to my search and still came up empty-handed. At this point, I was feeling like I should stop, but I had this weird, overwhelming need to know. I gave it one more shot, replacing Phoenix with Washington.

After clicking on a few links, I found it.

The same photo I'd been looking at in the Swan's living room accompanied a short article from the paper in Port Angeles.

_Forks boy, 12, drowns at First Beach._

_Tribal Police are calling the death of Jacob Swan an accident. Swan, the son of Forks Chief of Police Charles Swan, was pulled from the water at First Beach following a jump from a nearby cliff. Attempts to revive the boy were unsuccessful. He was pronounced dead at Fork Hospital. No services are planned yet._

There was an obituary posted a few days later, but that was it.

I shut down my laptop and set it on the bedside table before settling down into my bed and deeply inhaling the lingering scent of Bella.

I woke up early, needing to know if she was okay. The complete craziness that overtook my brain whenever I thought about Bella had definitely taken hold again as I pulled into the school parking lot with fifteen minutes until classes started. I climbed out of my car, found a bench under the eaves with a full view of the lot, and waited.

I heard her old truck before I spotted it pulling into a spot in the back of the lot. A small smile spread involuntarily as I stood and watched her small body hop from the vehicle. She wore the same skinny jeans that had nearly killed me last week, and her hair was pulled up in a messy ponytail displaying her long neck. For some reason it struck me as just about the sexiest thing I'd ever seen.

I watched her strolling across the parking lot. Rooted in place, I couldn't move- hell, I could hardly think. The first bell broke my trance and I turned quickly and bolted for class.

"Aren't you going to wait for your girlfriend, Eddie?"

I glanced in the direction of the nasally voice- Rosalie, of course. "She's not my girlfriend," I answered quickly.

"But Emmett told me you two had a date last night?" Rosalie's face was twisted in an ugly smile.

I was going to kill my fucking brother. Why the hell would he tell Rosalie I'd gone to the Swan's for dinner?

"It wasn't a-"

"How's your face?" Bella's voice cut me off.

Rosalie smirked. "Edward, your girlfriend's here."

I could smell her; she was right there beside me, so close that if I just lifted my finger I could touch her. I wanted to touch her. I shifted my glance nervously to Bella. "I sa-"

Bella interrupted me again. "I thought you said I messed up her face?" she asked with a slight whine.

Rosalie drew in a slow breath and her eyes narrowed with rage. The second bell rang and I brushed past Rosalie.

"Make-up," I answered Bella.

I could feel her presence behind me as we rounded the corner. I slowed to a stop, but Bella kept walking. I held up my hand in a half-hearted wave and felt it slowly drop back to my side as I realized Bella wasn't even going to give me a backwards glance. My mouth stayed glued shut and my feet remained rooted in place as I watched Bella walk away. I finally managed to move when Bella disappeared into a classroom and I realized how fucking late I was about to be.

I should have known that the confrontation with Rosalie was a sign of things to come. A very bad sign.

Logic told me that Bella would be a source of gossip at school today. This was, after all, Forks High. Nothing ever happened here, so it never took much to get everyone talking and Bella was definitely worth talking about. The fact that I was pretty sure I had been the only one to see her since Friday night made today even more interesting for the student population. There was one thing I wasn't prepared for, that was how much of said gossip would also be about me.

I had been the last one seen with Bella that night- and then the thing with Rose this morning.

Never in my life had I been a source of gossip, hell, I hardly even listened to it when it was about other people. But today, when I walked down the halls I heard my name in not-so-hushed whispers. I saw people turn and look while others pointed. I was not prepared for this.

Time was dragging, and when lunch finally rolled around, I was relieved to know that at least the day was almost over. I sat down at my usual table with Ben, who looked at me expectantly.

"So?" he asked, sounding like a four-year-old who needed to know where the bathroom was.

"So?" I asked back flatly.

"So, what happened after I left?"

I shrugged. "Nothing, man."

"Dude, come on. Don't hold out on me."

"I'm not."

"You sure?"

"Um, yeah. She slept in my bed, I slept on the couch and nothing happened."

"What about yesterday?"

"What _about_ yesterday?"

"You had a date with her?"

"It wasn't a date. I had dinner with her and Chief Swan. _He_ asked me to come."

It was Ben's turn to shrug. "We'll talk later," he said in a low, conspiratorial voice as Angela approached and sat beside him.

I shook my head and pinched the bridge of my nose.

I kept my eyes peeled for Bella, but she didn't come into the cafeteria during lunch. It didn't really surprise me, though; she hadn't been seen here since her first day. Of course, then she'd been hanging out with Emmett and now obviously she wasn't. Which probably gave her more reason to avoid the cafeteria. Credit had to be given to Rose: she was now back to holding court with Emmett beside her, and she was skilled with her make-up. She had managed to cover what had to be a nasty black eye. What she hadn't covered up was her distaste for Bella, and those who hadn't witnessed the now infamous incident had been fed skewed versions of that night's events. Versions that, not surprisingly, painted Bella in a very poor light.

I still really wanted to talk to her and ask if she was okay, especially since she was so off this morning. So midway through lunch I went to check the parking lot, but her truck was nowhere to be seen. I headed to class early and Bella showed as the bell rang. She barely looked at me as she sat down and her blank expression told me nothing. During the entire period she kept her gaze locked straight ahead, and she shot out of her seat as the bell rang, practically running from the room.

I didn't know what was going through her head. I didn't know if she was still upset from last night or if she was pissed off about what she'd heard Rosalie say this morning or if the gossip was getting to her.

The next few days continued in the same way. Bella would avoid contact with me at all costs, and I didn't have the fucking guts to do anything about it- maybe I really didn't want to. If I had really wanted to, I'm pretty sure I could have tracked her down. I could have talked to her, but I didn't. When I thought about it, it struck me that maybe I didn't because I was afraid.

I was afraid of further destroying the image of Bella that I had built up in my head. Every interaction I had with her had done something to shift the image of the sweet girl I had imagined her to be. It wasn't that I didn't like some of the things I was learning. It was just that it was different; so different sometimes that I knew it was only a matter of time before something I didn't like or couldn't handle surfaced.

Thursday had started out the same as all the others. Somehow in this small school, Bella and I managed not to cross paths until our one shared class. It was different, though, in that she arrived to the classroom before me. Her head was down on the table top, her eyes closed and her hair splayed out, when I walked in. I quietly slid onto the stool beside her. Bella's head was turned toward me, and I watched her eyelids flutter slightly as she heaved a deep sigh. She reeked of cigarette smoke, it was stronger than usual. It drowned out the other scents that I'd become accustomed to as Bella.

When Mr. Banner began class she opened her eyes, but still didn't lift her head. I tried not to look directly at her, but I noticed in my peripheral how her eyes were rimmed in red.

"Bella are you planning on participating or napping today?" Mr. Banner called out.

She drew in a shaky breath and squeezed her eyes shut tight, scrunching up her face as if in pain. "Fuck it," she breathed out before standing up and grabbing her backpack. "I can't do this." Bella walked out the door without looking back.

**A/N**- So... Okay, so I usually try not to beg for reviews, but *big sigh*... here it is, I've got about half of the next chapter done - unfortunately, it's a big, out-of-order mess and is just overwhelming the crap out of me... I'm thinking some reviews might motivate me a bit. also i'm on twitter, chickarocka3 and if you wanna get on there and harass me to write and get back on track; because it's so obvious when I'm not.


	18. Chapter 18

**a/n- thank you, thank you, thank you!! to all of you that reviewed last chapter!! it really helped to motivate me to write knowing that someone is reading it, and actually enjoying it, *hand to chest* seriously, i appreciated it so much. i know i didn't respond to the reviews, but they helped so much to focus me- as i said this chapter was a mess, and i think i got everything into it that i was trying to.**

**Also thanks to Natalie & Erin from PTB, for beta-ing this chapter. **

**So, i'll let'cha get on with it...**

BELLA

My emotions had been running high and were all over the board; this week sucked, it would have sucked without the weekends events, they just magnified everything. I just couldn't seem to get anything straight in my head. For the first time in my life, I wasn't the anchor, instead I was the battered boat riding out the storm-- the twisted part was that it was a storm of my own making.

Charlie seemed to be on my ass about everything, without actually being on my ass about anything. I don't know how that man could make someone feel completely inadequate with just a raise of his eyebrow, but he did. It was weird though, how normal things felt; Charlie wasn't constantly changing plans or forgetting things. Things were stable. As much as I loved Renee, I couldn't help but feel like this was how parents were supposed to act, and I had to admit, I kind of enjoyed it. Even if, after only a week of school, he was already contacting my teachers for progress reports and, unfortunately, my less than stellar efforts in my academics were finding there way onto his radar.

School was miserable enough, without Charlie stressing out about my grades. If torture was the primary motivation in my parents exiling me in Forks, they were definitely succeeding when it came to school. Forks High School was my own personal hell.

I knew that the whole altercation with Rosalie would be a big deal, the moment it happened I was vaguely aware that things had gone too far. Though, I obviously wasn't thinking about repercussions at the time, I should have been before it actually happened. Even though it hadn't taken long to figure out that Emmett was the big man on campus around here, I hadn't thought much about the other parties involved, and I couldn't believe that I had somehow missed the Queen Bee, Rosalie Hale. Was I really that unaware of the rest of the world? Apparently, I was. Honestly, I hadn't thought about anyone besides myself and I hadn't even been doing that well.

Last week, while committing social suicide, I had been completely wrapped up in how badly I needed to get out of Forks, and now I wasn't so sure that was the answer. I could say over and over again, that I didn't care, that I didn't need anyone- but it wasn't true. I had found a new friend this week, I guess you could say, in the midst of all my drama, Angela Weber had sought me out.

I was so eager to get off school grounds when lunch had finally come along on Monday, I was desperate for a cigarette and to just be somewhere else, if only for a few minutes. Someone had called out my name, I ignored it, like I'd been doing the entire morning; there was no one in this place I had any desire to talk to. I kept my eyes locked on my truck and I kept moving, though I could hear someone still scrambling along behind me. When I finally reached my truck, I glanced over my shoulder to find a mousy little brunette I recognized from a few of my classes. Angela was easy to get along with, she was sweet and non judgmental. Most importantly to me, she wasn't pushy; she was willing to take what I was willing to give and not ask for more.

I couldn't take pushing, avoidance was my thing and I was damn good at it. In Phoenix, I had managed to avoid a lot of my own thoughts and feelings. In Forks, I had a lot more to avoid; now, I had physical reminders of things I'd spent so long trying to forget. As the week started out I was surprised at how good I'd gotten at avoiding people. There were so many people here who I just couldn't deal with and the list kept getting longer. I was pretty sure that Rosalie and her lackeys were plotting against me, but she was fairly easily avoided; actually I got the feeling she was avoiding me too, waiting for her moment to pounce. Edward on the other hand was more difficult to avoid. I had gotten completely shit faced and spent the night in his bed. I'm still foggy on most of the details of that night, then had a fucking breakdown in front of him just days later. Now I could hardly bear to look at him. Every time I saw him I had no idea how to react, and I didn't know why I couldn't just let whatever it was go. Before this week I hadn't managed to run into him much on campus, but suddenly he was everywhere I turned, I spent more time than I care to admit ducking into open doorways.

Yeah, I was good at avoiding things, just not good enough. Today, I wanted to avoid everyone and everything. Today, I wanted to avoid being. I knew, before I opened my eyes this morning that today would be difficult.

For the last four years, this day had been bitter and this year was no different.

It was the first time in a week that Charlie had not pounded on my door to wake me, yet even that didn't feel good. My alarm had pulled me from sleep, I'd showered and dressed, barely looking at what I put on, managing only to run a brush through my hair. It wasn't long before I made my way downstairs, where I'd found the note Charlie had left for me.

_Bella,_

_Took the day off. Going to visit with Jake and maybe do some fishing. _

_Be home early, I'll treat you to dinner._

_Love you, Dad_

As much as it had made it easier that Charlie wasn't around it also reminded me of my place. Second to the child he'd lost.

As easy as it would have been to just go back to bed; to spend the day under the covers, trying to focus on how things had been. I knew I couldn't stay in the house, because I knew that those thoughts would only remind me of how twisted things had become. I went to school just so I would have something to distract me, but it was little help.

I slunk around the school. At lunch, I darted out to my truck and drove around the corner like usual to smoke, Angela had been joining me the last few days, she didn't smoke but would hang out in the bed of the truck with me. Today, I hadn't waited for her, though. As I sat there chain smoking, I flipped my phone open and shut over and over again, and debated calling Renee._ It's my birthday, she should be calling me._ My stomach knotted at the thought, I turned my phone off and shut it in the glove box. _Temptation gone._ I felt a little bit of pride at my self control, thinking it was something I'd been lacking lately.

It wasn't long before I found myself wishing I hadn't left on my own, though. I didn't want to talk, but thought it would have been easier just to hear another person breathing beside me, to just not be alone with my thoughts. It was that idea that brought me back to school early, and I really thought it would help, but I was wrong. As I sat there, listening to everyone else filing in, I realized how wrong I was. I could hear all the idle chit-chat, but I felt so far away from it.

I felt more alone in that moment than I had back in my truck.

I couldn't do it anymore.

I left the classroom, barely managing to gather my things as I flew toward the door and headed straight for the parking lot. I jumped in The Beast, my safe haven, bringing him to life and roaring out of the parking lot.

Of course once I was going, I had no idea where I was going to. I slowed as I approached a stop sign and considered my options. Apparently while I'd been on auto-pilot, I'd driven to the outskirts of Forks and really it made since where I'd ended up. If I turned right I'd be on the road that led to the cemetery. Part of me wanted to go down that road, but I just couldn't make myself. Part of me wanted to turn back to town and find a place to hide from this day, but I couldn't make myself do that either.

Images of that day kept running though my head and I couldn't fight them off any longer. Charlie had taken Jake and I down to First Beach, while he went fishing with some of his friends on the reservation Jake had been living in Forks for two years and he spent a lot of time in La Push with Charlie, he had friends there he wanted to hang out with. Jake hadn't wanted me to come, but I didn't want to stay home. I didn't know why Jake was so pissy about me being there. It was late summer, and the sun had actually been shinning early in the day, I could remember how the sand felt warm where I dug my toes in off the end of my towel as I lounged with a book. I spent the day by myself, reading and occasionally wandering down dipping my toes in the chilly water.

It began to get cooler, as clouds gathered, and dusk settled in quickly, some of the older boys had started a fire with wood they had sent Jacob and his buddies to gather. One of those older boys, Sam I think, had brought me a coke and sat down beside me. I was uncomfortable, I didn't want to be there anymore, but Charlie hadn't arrived yet to pick us up. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Jake and his friends rolling their eyes in my direction, and an older girl who kept glaring at me. The guys were all talking big, trying to impress each other and someone, and I wish I'd been paying more attention as to whom, dared Jake and Embry to jump from the cliffs.

It was getting darker and the surf was getting rougher and Jacob knew better, he did. I know he did. He probably was going to say no, that it was a stupid idea, but I said it instead. The older boys laughed and joked, asking if Jake was gonna let me tell him what to do. I realized later, that this is why Jake didn't want me there, he didn't want to look the fool because of me. The crowd all laughed and hollered as Jake and Embry headed over to pick their way up the rocky path that wrapped around to an outcropping of rock, about half way up the cliffs.

Conversations continued to flow around me, but I was completely detached as I watched, I couldn't believe Jacob was going to be this stupid. Then they jumped. I'm sure the shouts around me were probably loud, everything felt so far away, time seemed to move slowly; I couldn't believe he had done it. I felt my body rock with every breath I took and my eyes were glued to the where the waves crashed below the cliffs.

If he ever surfaced I didn't know, it was impossible to see.

A few minutes later Embry had emerged at the shoreline alone.

I don't know how long I sat there at the intersection, before a horn blared behind me. The beast was still idling in the road and realization dawned that maybe it wasn't the best place for the breakdown I knew was coming. I rolled slowly through the stop sign and pulled over to the side of the road.

EDWARD

It was drizzling while I stretched in the parking lot before cross country practice, and I found myself scanning the vehicles for Bella's truck. I was pretty fucking certain that she wouldn't be there, but I just hadn't been able to shake the uneasy feeling I'd had when I saw Bella's face earlier. She had that same distant look in her eyes that she'd had when I asked about the picture at her house, and she just looked so small and alone.

We were set to run one of our usual routes and I didn't feel much like company, so I gave a quick shout to a couple of my teammates who were stretching out, and headed out on my own. It was a run I'd done many times before and I began to lose track of myself, as music pumped from my iPod and my muscles began to burn. I felt good and decided to add an extra mile or so to my workout, by running out just a bit further before turning around. As I took off down the trail and got closer to the road, I caught sight of a rusted red pickup pulled on to the shoulder.

_What the hell? What could she be doing out here?_ There was no way it could be Bella, but I had to be sure. I ran to get a better look, and while I did, I berated myself for how irrational I was about anything pertaining to Bella. When I got closer I knew it was her truck, but I didn't see Bella. I couldn't figure out why the hell she'd leave her truck out her in the middle of nowhere. _Maybe it'd broke down? But still, why would she be out here?_ I jogged a little closer and peered into the passenger window, and there she was.

She looked like she was asleep; she lay across the bench seat on her back, with her knees bent near the steering wheel. Before I'd even processed the movement, I brought my knuckles up to the window and raped lightly. Through the glass, I could see her eyelids flutter as she craned her neck backward.

I pulled open the door to the truck. "You okay?"

Her eyes were still rimmed in red, and just soft, unguarded and sad, something about them sent chills through my body. I noticed a slight movement of her shoulder, and figured it was meant to be a shrug.

"Car trouble?" I asked softly.

She made another small movement, this time a tiny bobble of her head.

"Um... You sure you're okay?"

She sighed softly. "It's my birthday." Her voice was scarcely a whisper.

"Happy Birthday," I stated. I tried to keep my voice even and not turn it into a question, but I really couldn't understand why someone would be so upset about a birthday.

"Ha," she breathed, as she closed her eyes again.

I didn't know what to say, so I said nothing and silence stretched on between us. My clothing was wet from the drizzle, which wasn't a big deal when I had been running but now that I was standing still my body temperature was starting to drop. Bella pulled her full lower lip between her teeth, and ever so slowly drew it out again, over and over again. I don't know whether it was that image, or the cold that caused me to shiver.

Her eyes had opened again and gradually focused on me. "Shit," she said, her voice still low and slightly rough. "Are you cold?" She scrunched up her nose. "Why the fuck are you standing out there?"

The corners of my mouth twitched up slightly and I shrugged at her. I didn't know why the hell I was still standing there; I just knew I couldn't leave her like that.

Bella arched her back in a stretch, and my eyes were glued to her chest. She swung her feet down to the floor, before slowly rolling to a sit with a slight groan. Her head lolled back on the seat and she stared, unfocused out through the windshield and I continued to stand there, not sure if this was an invitation or not.

After a moment Bella's hand fell limply to the seat. "Get in," she said in the same soft tone.

"Um... I should getting going, really," I mumbled.

"Please... don't." She turned to where I still stood, hands on the frame of her truck, shivering slightly; her red rimmed eyes now filling with tears. "I just don't wanna be by myself anymore..." she trailed off, her teeth worrying her lower lip again. I glanced over my shoulder, trying to scan for any other runners. When I looked back at her, Bella was regarding me carefully, a defeated look on her face. "Never mind," she breathed.

"No, it's not..." I hopped up into the truck beside her and pulled the door shut. "It's just... Can I borrow your phone?"

"Glove box," she replied despondently; her eyes had glazed over again. "It's off."

I seemed odd that she'd just be sitting out here, basically in the middle of nowhere with her phone off, on her birthday, then there was the way she'd left school and she'd obviously been crying. I didn't get it.

I pulled out her phone and shot a quick text to Ben, _With Bella – Edward, _becauseI knewthat someone would be waiting at school for me to finish my run otherwise_. _I turned her phone back off before returning it to her glove box, it was at least good to know that Ben couldn't try and call back.

Again, silence lingered between us.

I opened my mouth several times, but no words found managed to find their way past my tongue, as I watched Bella stare off into space and gnaw on her lower lip. My wet clothes were sticking to me and I shifted, uncomfortably, in the seat. The springs creaked beneath me and caused Bella to turn toward the sound, and her eyes widened slightly as she focused her vision on me. I couldn't help but wonder if she'd forgotten I was there.

"Sorry," she whispered, finally releasing her lip from the torment of her teeth.

"Why do you always say that? You haven't done anything to be sorry about."

She shrugged in response, and her vision glided back to the windshield. The quiet in the truck was almost eerie, I swear you could hear the water on the windshield collect and slide down the glass. I realized that the entire time I had been here, neither one of us had raised our voice above a whisper.

"What are you doing out here?" The question fell out of my mouth without thought.

"Jake." Bella nodded toward the point she'd spent the last ten minutes staring. "I wanna go, I just..."

Then it dawned on me.

"It's your birthday," I breathed, and she nodded again. It wasn't just her birthday, it was their birthday and just beyond those trees where her vision was locked, was the cemetery. Suddenly, the reverent atmosphere fit. "Do you want me to take you?"

~*~

Even though Bella had agreed to let me take her, it took a good fifteen minutes for her to slide over to the passenger's seat, and another five before she let me start the truck up. Then it was like she shut down; her eyes stared, unfocused, ahead of us and she didn't move, aside from her head bouncing with every bump in the road. I kept stealing glances at her as I drove, waiting for some sort of reaction, any reaction.

I parked in the small lot just inside the cemetery gate and shut off her truck. "Bella?" I asked, when she still hadn't moved.

I was afraid it was going to be as much of a struggle to get her out of the truck as it had been to get started, it wasn't. At my call, her eyes snapped to mine; the lost look of earlier was gone, replaced with something I couldn't quite place, but if I had to name it- I'd say determination. I didn't feel like she needed it, but I smiled at her, encouragingly. Bella was out of the truck, before I had even opened my door.

I followed, wordlessly as she walked down the path through the middle of the cemetery, not stopping until she reached a low wall bordering the forest. I hadn't spent much time in a cemetery before, honestly, I don't think I had ever been in one before. I didn't know what the hell we were doing. I didn't know why we hadn't stopped at one of the grave markers, why we had to come back here. Bella seemed sure of her direction though, so I didn't question her.

"I can't believe I remembered where it was, I haven't been here." Bella's voice broke into my thoughts. "It's not how I thought it would be you know?"

I still didn't understand what draw the wall held, as I glanced back over my shoulder at the rows and rows of grave markers of different shapes and sizes, knowing that each one of them had to some hold on someone, somewhere. "What's not?" I watched her, noticing every shift off her body and trying to follow her gaze. Looking carefully, to see if I could see what she saw.

"Being here," her voice still soft, but a little less rough than it had been earlier. She sighed deeply before continuing. "It's not all... I don't know. I guess I just thought I'd feel... more."

"More what?"

"More anything. I just don't..." She stopped and lowered herself to a bench in front of the wall.** "**Charlie comes out here... a lot. I thought maybe I was supposed to feel him here and I don't."

Not knowing what to say to her, I figured it was best to just let her talk when she was ready, it had worked so far. During the lapse in conversation, I realized the drizzle was turning into something heavier, eventually fat rain drops began to fall; we were both wet already so there was nothing to complain about. Bella stood and slowly walked over to begin tracing a plaque on the wall, the tips of her tiny fingers running lightly over letters and numbers; a name and dates.

"I don't know if I'm relieved or disappointed." She finally said.

I could feel my eyebrows knit together as I tried to put myself in her shoes. "Why?" I breathed, to myself.

It was a question I didn't mean to ask, and I definitely didn't intend for her to answer, but her slight shrug indicated that she had heard it. A deep sigh escaped her before she spoke, "It would just be easy if there were some_ place_ I could go and know he was there... of course that would mean he was somewhere, like he should be." Her hand dropped from the plaque. "If I had just stayed home," she mumbled.

"Do you want to go?" I blurted.

Bella scrunched up her nose and shoved her wet hair back from her face. "Oh, I should take you home, or something huh?"

It was my turn to shrug a response. I didn't want her to feel we needed to go because of me. She was the one who said something about going home, but she just looked confused when I said it.

"Are we gonna... I mean do you..."_ How the fuck was I supposed to ask this question?_ "His grave?" I didn't want to ask, but I wanted to be sure she got whatever closure, or whatever she was looking for out of this.

The corners of her mouth lifted ever so slightly, in the closest thing to a smile I'd seen from her all day.

"He was cremated, his ashes are here." She lifted her hand and went back to tracing the name Jacob Swan. "It's weird, huh? Not what I would want... but he hadn't had time to think about it. It was Charlie's decision." She spread her palm out flat against the niche in the wall, I could see the tendons across the back of her hand tense as she pressed her hand to it. She turned back to me, a ghost of a smile on her lips and a renewed strength in her eyes. "Let's go."

**a/n- chapter 19 is more than half done, if things aren't too crazy this week it should be off to PTB by the weekend. follow me on twitter and you can harass me when i'm getting distracted- which i tend to do often :) chickarocka3**


	19. Chapter 19

**a/n- i don't own**

**thanks to ptb and all my reviewers last chapter, shouldn't need tissues this chapter.**

EDWARD

Bella drove as we left the cemetery, and something between us felt completely different. I almost felt as if we could actually talk to each other, almost. I doubted a decent conversation could be had over the roar of her truck's engine.

The clouds overhead were darker and more ominous now, and rain was sheeting off her windows. I was fucking freezing in my shorts and soaked tee shirt. I couldn't help shivering. Bella had cranked up the heat in the truck, but it was doing little to warm me. I was so fucking eager to get out of my cold, wet clothes and hopefully warm up, that I had the door open before Bella stopped in front of my house. My mind was fixated on the idea of a hot shower; standing in the cascading water until the heat seeped into my bones. Though there was a tiny part of me that wasn't ready to part with Bella yet, and as I glanced over my shoulder at her that part grew exponentially.

"You wanna come in for bit?" The words passed through my frozen, trembling lips with a rush of air. I'm pretty sure the shaking in my voice was the result of the cold and not my nerves, at least that is what I would say if anyone who asked.

She glanced down at her wrist, as if checking the time, but her wrist was bare. Turning her head she scanned the seat beside her. When her eyes locked on the glove box where her phone was still safely stowed and shut off, she shrugged slightly. "Okay," she said softly.

My house was quiet when we entered. I knew that my mom was around somewhere, but I didn't really want to answer why I was home late, soaking wet, with a girl. Though, I'm pretty sure she would have been so excited about the last part, and that she wouldn't question any of it. I still lead Bella up the stairs to my room as quickly and quietly as possible, mostly, to spare myself any embarrassment.

"You want some dry clothes?" I asked softy, once the door was securely shut behind us.

"Sure." Bella's answer was as hushed as mine.

Rummaging around in my dresser I pulled out a tee shirt and a pair of sweats with a drawstring. I thought the drawstring might help to keep the pants on her, since they would obviously be too big. I handed her the clothes, and let her use my bathroom first to change.

When I came out, I didn't see her. "Bella?" I called. I felt like an idiot. I hadn't heard the door, but couldn't keep myself from wondering if she'd left.

"Get in," her muffled voice came from underneath the covers of my bed.

A grin spread across my face before I crawled into the bed. In a cocoon of blankets, Bella was laying on her side and I lay facing her. I could feel the heat that radiated off of her little body. I scooted as close as possible, without actually touching her, trying to soak it up. My face, again, reflexively lit in a smile when one of her soft breaths tickled my nose.

"I'm so fucking cold," she moaned.

I let out a short chuckle. "Me too," I whispered. Bella's eyes met mine for a long moment, that felt like lifetimes stretching; it felt as though I could see time passing. Abruptly, she dropped her gaze.

"So, thanks," Bella breathed.

"Uh, huh," I murmured. Her breath was warm on my face, and minty; which was off for her. She smelled fresh, floral somehow. I was used to the lingering smell of cigarettes on Bella, and I guess that was there too, but muted. She hadn't smoked in the time I'd been with her this afternoon, and the rain had probably helped to wash some of it away; and she was wearing my clothes. I knew it was out of necessity, but that didn't keep the corners of my mouth from lifting at the thought.

"Edward," she said.

"Hmm." I was lost in thoughts where we were even closer, thoughts where my hands tangled in her hair.

"Edward," she repeated, more forcefully.

My eyes snapped open and met hers. "Really, thanks. I needed that."

"It's not a big deal, Bella."

"It is though."

I shrugged, but Bella didn't see. Her eyes were closed, and she was grinning lightly.

"Jake loved birthdays, more than Christmas, even."

"Why?"

"'Cause it was just our day, nobody else's."

"What happened?" I blurted out my question without thinking. Bella continued to lie there quietly with her eyes closed, her breathing even. "You don't have to tell me, I just..." _I just what? Am a nosy motherfucker? I can obviously tell how much this upsets you, but I just have to fucking know? "_I shouldn't have asked."

"No, it's fine. It was just a stupid, stupid stunt. There was a dare and he jumped like and idiot and I shouldn't have been there, but I was. The whole thing probably never would have happened if I had just stayed home. He really wasn't that stupid, I know he wasn't." The words were tumbling out of Bella's mouth so quickly I couldn't process most of them.

"Bella," I said softly, in an attempt to slow her or stop her, but she just continued.

Words kept spilling from her lips. "I said don't, so he did."

_I am an ass. _

"Bella." I lifted my index finger to her lips. Her plump lips were just as soft as I had imagined. She shuttered slightly at my touch, and finally the flow of words stopped. For a moment.

"Your hand is cold." Her breath was hot against my finger.

Bella reached up and pulled my hand away from her face and I immediately felt guilty, like I'd crossed a line with her. More than that, though, I felt disappointed; she didn't want me touching her. My disappointment was short lived, as she drew my hand down in the open space between us and clutched it between her hands. They weren't much warmer than mine, but she was touching me, and I wasn't going to deny myself. I moved my other hand to rest on top of hers, but she pulled her hand free and sandwiched my hands between hers.

"It wasn't your fault," I finally whispered, my eyes searching for hers.

Bella kept her gaze downward. She refused to look at me as she whispered back, "You don't know that."

"Bella?" With that one word I begged her to look at me, and she must have heard the plea in my voice. "It wasn't," I spoke softly, but firmly when our eyes locked.

She seemed to flounder for a moment, her mouth gaped slightly and her lips twitched to form words, but no sound escaped. She inhaled shakily. "I know, really I do... I just... I just need someone to blame, I guess." Bella's eyes drifted shut again, and she let out a slow breath. "I could have fought him more."

"Would he have listened?"

Bella was quiet for another moment. Then, she actually laughed. "No, he was more stubborn than I am." Her lower lip danced back and forth as she alternately sucked the corners into her mouth. "I guess... it was just... he was gone and things were wrong, and nothing made them right." Looking up, she stared hard into my eyes, her brow furrowing in concentration. "You have no idea how long it's been since I've talked about him, about Jake," she added, like she just needed to say his name.

I pulled my hands from hers and trailed my fingers up her forearms. I felt goosebumps rise on her arms and noticed the slightest upward twitch at the corners of her mouth. As I brought my eyes up to hers, I found Bella's eyes trained lower on my face. My tongue darted out to moisten my lips and I watched in awe as Bella mirrored my action.

I doubt that either one of us really instigated what happened next.

It was like a game of tug-of-war. Her head moved slightly back as I forward. She came toward me and I shifted away. It was a dance that didn't end until our faces were mere fractions of an inch away from each other. The air between us was my breath mixed with hers and it was intoxicating. It felt so much like my dream from the other night, I fought the urge to pinch myself and make sure it was real this time. I felt her soft lips touch mine, and immediately felt the need for more-- more touching, more pressure, more of this, more of Bella. I opened my mouth slightly to her and my hands found their way into her hair. I felt her tiny fingers creep their way up my chest, and her tongue found it's way into my mouth and I caressed it lightly with my own. The moment was everything I had hoped, and more. My heart rate increased and I could hear my blood pounding in my ears.

It wasn't until Bella began to pull away that I realized that the pounding was actually on my door. When I heard the knocking I planned on ignoring it. I tightened my hands in Bella's hair and urged her to me, hoping she would ignore it as well. Instead she pressed her lips to mine once more, before untangling herself from me.

Emmett's voice was booming from behind the closed door. "Eddie, come on. Dinner's ready."

I flopped onto my back, and fought my way free of the blankets that Bella and I had burrowed under. "Okay," I hollered in response, hoping he'd fuck off.

"Mom says Bella can stay," he called, the laughter in his voice evident.

I looked over to Bella. She was still on her side, facing me, her face just popping out of the pile of blankets. Her cheeks were flush with a recent blush and a light smile played at her lips. "I should go. Charlie's probably waiting on me."

I understood she needed to go, but it was the last thing I wanted.

BELLA

Once again, I was thankful for Emmett Cullen.

Whatever was going on in that bed, underneath those blankets. Whatever alternate universe Edward and I had created there, Emmett had destroyed it. And I was glad.

It was so wrong of me to allow that to happen. I was seeking comfort and tangling myself up with this boy, just because he was willing to provide me a shelter for a moment. He was able to give me a few minutes peace, and I took it. Though, there wasn't anything I could, or would provide him in return. I was being unfair. I couldn't let it happen again.

So I'd gotten out of his bed and out of his house as quickly as I could manage. Yanking on my wet sneakers over my bare feet, and clutching the waist of his pants that were too big on me, I made hurried apologies and headed out to my truck. Alone in The Beast, I realized how unglued I had become today. I was ridulously open and honest, and tomorrow I would be fucking ashamed, but today, it felt good. Too bad I could never let it happen again.

I smoked three cigarettes on the short drive back to Charlie's, though I did feel kind of weird about it since I was wearing Edward's clothes. Charlie was waiting on the porch. I sighed deeply before climbing from the truck. I concentrated on taking slow even breaths, as I walked to the house. It felt like I was moving through sand, each step took more effort than the last and my movements were sluggish. I was two feet from the steps before Charlie spoke.

"I know it's your birthday, Bells, but you could answer your phone," he said gruffly.

"I... I just... I has some stuff to take care of," I managed to stammer out.

Charlie nodded at me. "You saw Jake," he said, his voice low.

I stared down at the backs of my hands, feigning complete fascination in dimples created when I flexed my fingers. "I wouldn't say that," I whispered.

"Bell, I know where you were today."

My eyes darted up and met his for a brief second. A second that made my insides twist.

"School called. You wouldn't answer your cell, I had my deputies looking for you..."

"That sounds like an abuse of power," I interrupted with a grumble. One edge of Charlie's mustache lifted, as he fought a grin. "I'm not going back."

"Okay."

''Okay?" I asked incredulously.

"Okay," he stated softly, once more. I met his eyes again, and didn't understand the emotion I found. "Dinner's cooking." He jerked his head toward the open doorway and I nodded in acknowledgement, before taking the last few steps to the porch. As I brushed past Charlie to enter the house, he pulled me into an embrace. His arms were warm, comforting and familiar, and again I let myself just enjoy the comfort another person could provide. Though, this felt a lot less like using someone. I let myself get lost in the scent of Old Spice, as I breathed in my father. He dipped his head down and whispered roughly in my ear. "Bella, I love you. You're my child, you're here and I love you." But there was more that he didn't say, more that I could feel in his firm hold, and more that I could intone from his voice. Charlie wanted me here, needed me here; more he would ever say and more than Renee ever could.

I could have cried. I would have cried, but I was just done crying today.

"And, I'm gonna let the not answering your phone and skipping school go, but only because it's your birthday." As I looked up into his eyes that were so like mine, and my small grin mirrored his.

The moment we shared was brief and interrupted by the high pitched shriek of the smoke alarm.

**00**

The meal Charlie had tried to make from Grandma Swan's recipe book was blackened and unrecognizable, but I couldn't fault him for trying. We ended up eating at the diner, in our usual quiet manner, and Charlie insisted someone find a candle for my slice of pie. I didn't want pie, but I couldn't bring myself to deny his request.

I was uncomfortably full and emotionally exhasted. I couldn't wait get back to Charlie's and climb into bed. He went to pay the bill, as I pushed the pie around my plate. I leaned back into the seat of the diner booth and closed my eyes and imagined soft sheets and fluffy pillows. Ones that were so inviting, but weren't the ones on my bed.

"What are you so happy about?" Charlie asked when he arrived back at the table. I huffed slightly as he pulled me from my thoughts, and realized a smile had been playing at my lips. Charlie slid himself back into the booth seat across from me and checked his watch; it was something he'd been doing constantly throughout the meal and it was making me nervous. "Your mom and I got together on a gift for you," he started slowly. "It's back at the house."

I sighed. "Char..."

He cleared his throat, interrupting me. There was a firm look in his eyes when I met them, that authoritative thing I was still getting used to.

"Dad," I tried again. The corner of his mustache twitched up in approval. "I don't do birthday gifts, you know that," I said softly.

Charlie shrugged a little in response. "Yeah, well. I wanted to hold off until your grades improved anyway."

I drew in deep breath and fought the urge to say anything else. If we were going to do this, I wanted to just get it over with and not draw it out.

"I lost that argument with your mom." That was nothing new, I don't think anyone ever won an argument with that woman. "So, here's the deal." Charlie's tone reminded me of an interrogation in a police drama, I wondered if this was the way he spoke to suspects he encountered. Then I wondered how often he would actually have to interrogate people in Forks. "You'll get signed up for tutoring," he finished up.

_Fuck_. I had zoned out completely and missed half of what he said. "Wait, what? I don't need a tutor."

"Well you're doing it," he said firmly. "You're a smart girl and you're grades, well, they're not reflecting that."

I sighed. "I can get my grades up..."

Charlie cut me off. "You _will_ get your grades up, and you _will_ go to tutoring. You're on my turf here Bells, and you're gonna do things my way." He jabbed his index finger, into the table in a gesture that made it clear the discussion was over.

I chewed on my lip, pouting like a five year old, while he checked his watch again. "Do you have somewhere to be?" I asked, my irritation showing in my tone.

"No, why?" he asked, glancing once more at his watch.

"You keep checking your watch," I groaned.

"Sorry, didn't realize. Must be habit," he answered indifferently. I shrugged. If it was a habit, it was one I hadn't noticed before, _whatever_. He looked at the remainder of my pie, now mutilated on my plate. "So, are you ready to go?"

I nodded, slowly at him. I was definitely ready to go.

**00**

I noticed the lights were on inside when we pulled up in front of the house. "Huh," I breathed as Charlie shut off the cruiser.

"What's that?" he asked, distractedly.

"Nothing. I just thought I turned the lights off."

Charlie pulled up the sleeve of his jacket and checked his watch again. "Bella, wait here," he said gruffly before climbing out of the cruiser.

**a/n- thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed- let me know.**


	20. Chapter 20

**A**/**N-** BemW, I'm a big fat liar, said this would be up last week, and it wasn't. I'm an ass. This took forever again. Anywho, thanks to Ann and ms. ambrosia who beta-ed this chapter. I don't own nothing. Now, let's get on with it.

BELLA

"Wait here," he said before he hit the lock button and slammed the door shut. Charlie sauntered away from the cruiser with his hand hovering near the holster on his hip.I grew more anxious with every step he took.

I didn't need the stress. I was exhausted emotionally and physically, and now this, whatever this was. I didn't know what to think. Closing my eyes tightly, I gnawed on my lower lip as a release. _What was going on in there?_

IIt felt like ages before someone appeared in the doorway. A man, stockier and shorter than Charlie, came out. He was followed by someone I recognized immediately, even though her face was in shadow. A sigh of relief escaped me. Giving a brief nod in my direction the man got into a car parked in front of my truck, one I hadn't noticed before. I yanked on the door and slammed into it with all my weight. Of course, the lock didn't disengage; that shit was going to leave a bruise. I smacked at the unlock button and finally managed to tear open the door. I ran across the yard and when I reached the porch, I threw my arms around Alice's neck. It was also very possible that I let out a high pitched squeal.

"Happy Birthday, Bella! Are you okay? How is everything? I tried calling before I got on the plane, but just got your voicemail, so I was worried. But that was hours ago, you were probably at school, huh?" Words spilled quickly out of Alice's mouth as we embraced, and I couldn't make much sense of them. Alice loosened her grip and pushed me back slightly. "Did you have a okay day?" she asked gently.

"It was..." I trailed off, trying and failing to come up with something to explain. "Well it's better now, whatever it was."

"Okay gift, I take it?" Charlie interrupted from the house.

I could have fucking choked him.

"Why the fuck did you lock the car door!" I nearly shouted in exasperation. "You seriously freaked me out."

Charlie smiled at me sheepishly. "It's habit," he said, shrugging as he smoothed his mustache. "I wasn't trying to worry you." His eyebrow quirked, "Geez, Bell, what did you think was going on?"

_What did I think was going on?_ I wasn't sure that was something I wanted to admit to myself, let alone say out loud. I sucked in all the stress and fear, that I'd felt in those few moments I'd been alone in the car, and shook my head to rid myself of them. "Yeah, I guess this is an okay gift," I said softly, before turning my attention back to my best friend and squeezing her tightly. "Alice, I can't believe you're here. How long are you staying?"

"Sunday afternoon. I'm all yours 'til then," she said smiling.

A short while later, the two of us were up in my room. I knew Alice probably could have sat up talking for hours. The two of us laid, side by side, on the air mattress Charlie had set up in my room; it took up the entire floor space in the tiny room. I tried, but once the excitement of seeing her wore off a bit, I hit a wall and couldn't even make logical conversation.

"You're really okay today?" she asked quietly, after several minutes of silence had passed between us.

I let myself process the question and was really sure of my answer when I mumbled, "I am."

"Good," I heard her whisper as I drifted off to sleep.

Alice slept like the dead; she didn't get up until nearly noon. I had woken much earlier,before the sun rose, freezing my ass off on the air mattress. I didn't understand how Alice wasn't cold. I'd crawled into my bed and tried to coax myself back to sleep, but I was wide awake. After awhile, I snuck downstairs, careful not to wake Alice.

Charlie was in the kitchen brewing a pot of coffee. I had found that coffee was his one successful venture in the kitchen.

"You're up already?" He sounded surprised to see me.

"Weird, huh?" I mumbled.

"I figured you'd sleep in. You seemed pretty worn out last night."

I chewed my lip. "I was."

Charlie's eyes met mine, and I could tell he understood everything that implied. He nodded once at me. "Well, since Alice is only here until Sunday, I planned on letting you stay home and spend some time with her. Though, you did miss some classes yesterday too…" He brushed at his mustache as if he was considering this, but I could read the glint of humor in his eyes.

I rolled my eyes and fixed myself a cup of coffee before I settled myself on the couch. That was where I was sitting when Alice finally flitted down the stairs, looking well rested and perfect as always. It was a mundane situation that Alice was far too excited about. We hadn't been separated for that long, but apparently it was easy to forget how exuberant Alice could be. The first words she said made it obvious that Alice had plans for me. "Go take a shower," she instructed, "but don't dry your hair."

I groaned as I rose from the couch, stretching slowly. "No 'good morning,'" I grumbled jokingly.

"Good morning," she deadpanned before whining, "Now, hurry up."

I shot a glare over my shoulder as I headed up the stairs. It wasn't worth arguing; a shower sounded nice and Alice would get her way regardless. In the bathroom, I hesitantly stripped out of Edward's clothes, thankful t hat neither Charlie nor Alice had asked. I held the shirt up to my face and inhaled deeply as a pleasant, relaxing, slightly electric feeling overtook me. Realizing his scent had an effect similar to cigarettes, I smiled. The next second, I rolled my eyes and mentally scolded myself for that thought. Discarding the shirt on the floor, I stepped into the stream of nearly scalding water and hoped I could burn thoughts of kissing him again out of my brain.

Time with Alice was kind of cathartic. We did ridiculously girly things: we baked cupcakes, and she painted my nails and did something to my hair that was way too elaborate for hanging around the house. And, though I personally would have chosen to read a book, watching _Bring it __On _had a way of distracting me from thinking any real thoughts. Alice insisted that everyone should own the entire _Bring It On_ collection, and when I agreed with her, I knew I needed a cigarette.

"I wasn't done yet, Bella," Alice pouted, waving around a bottle of nail polish as I slipped out the front door.

"Just one," I called. I definately wasn't going to stay outside for long. I was freezing my ass off, in a tank top and a pair of threadbare sweats. They were the first thing I saw after my shower this morning.

"Don't fucking smudge your nails," Alice yelled back.

As I sat shivering on the porch, smoking as quickly as I could, Edward's Volvo pulled in behind my truck. My heart rate began to quicken. In my mind I, again, drifted back to the night before. _H__is scent__. H__is touch__._ I sucked my lower lip into my mouth at the thought of his mouth on mine. A smile was involuntarily playing at my lips. I groaned at myself. I couldn't let myself go there again. It couldn't happen again. Edward was sweet, a good guy, and I was... a mess. It wasn't fair for me to involve myself with him.

EDWARD

I had hoped to have a little more time to prepare myself, but there she was, sitting on the front porch. The sight of her caused something to bubble up inside me. I had all day and all night to think about this, but I still found myself nervous and scared. My fingers had tightened involuntarily around the steering wheel as I realized it was too late to drive away; she'd already seen me. Taking a few deep breaths, I climbed out of my car.

I grabbed the bag of her clothing that I had washed at three in the morning after giving up my attempts at sleep. It was impossible when Bella's scent surrounded me; my mind and body were still buzzing with the energy of her touch. The lack of sleep left me anxious for school, so I could see here again. I intentionally arrived a little later than usual, hoping I could catch her in the parking lot, but she wasn't there.

"Dude, what the fuck?" Ben asked as he dropped on the bench across from me at lunch.

"What?"

"You never called me back yesterday," he accused. "What happened with Bella?" Ben drawled out her name, with his eyebrows wiggling.

Rolling my eyes, I shrugged at him while I scanned the cafeteria for any sign of her.

The clatter of a tray hitting the table drew my attention. "She's not here," Angela said as she sat down beside Ben.

Ben smirked at me as Angela smiled apologetically. I sighed heavily. The night before at dinner, my mom and Emmett had continued to shoot furtive looks at me. I didn't know what was going on between Bella and me, but it seemed like everyone around me thought they did.

When Bella didn't show at school all day, I decided to take her clothes to her house. It was a decision I questioned the moment I pulled up. I figured she had stayed home because she was still upset about yesterday. I remembered how vunerable she'd looked, and that' was what I had expected to see again. But it wasn't. Instead, she looked amazing. Her dark hair was swept gently back from her face and cascaded down her back in soft curls that I desperately wanted to touch. Her eyes weren't rimmed in red from tears, but instead framed in thick lashes and accented with light make-up.

"I just thought I'd bring your clothes by... from yesterday, you know." I stammered out my lame excuse for being there. Unspoken words left a bitter taste on my tongue. There was so much I wanted to ask, to say, but I felt as though she was deliberately avoiding eye contact.

"Thanks," she said softly, barely glancing at me as she spoke.

"I, um, washed everything for you." As I spoke, I closed the distance between us.

"You didn't have to do that," she said to my shoes.

I didn't know what else to say. It was beyond awkward. I wanted know what she was thinking, but she wasn't giving anything away.

"Bella, come on already. You have to be..." A female voice came from the house, and trailed off as she came out the front door, "done with your cigarette." I watched as the eyes of the girl flashed between Bella and me, a smile spreading across her face. "Hi, I'm Alice," she squeaked after a few awkward moments, extending a hand to me. "I'm visiting. From Phoenix."

"Edward Cullen."

Alice's smile grew as she regarded me carefully. It was making me even more uncomfortable. "Uh-uh-uh, you said one," she said, suddenly whipping her head around.

Bella stood sheepishly with an unlit cigarette between her fingers.

As quickly as she'd turned to Bella, her eyes were back on me. "So, what are you doing here?" Alice asked.

"I brought this by for Bella." I jostled the bag still hanging from my fingers.

Alice pulled it from my hand. "What is it?"

"Al, stop," Bella hissed, snatching the bag. "Thanks." She nodded at me as she passed, heading toward the door.

"So, what are you doing today?" Alice asked. I noticed Bella look over her shoulder at us, her eyebrows raised.

The two girls seemed to share a wordless conversation as I mumbled, "Just studying."

"On a Friday?" she asked incredulously. Alice didn't wait for an answer before adding, "You should hang out with us for awhile. We're just watching movies. And we've got cupcakes. Hey, Bell, he should stay, right?"

"Sure. Edward, stay," Bella said to the door as she pushed it open.

It wasn't the most inviting opening. I was pretty sure she wanted me to go, actually, but I just couldn't.

I followed Bella and Alice into the house, sitting in the same chair I had when I'd been there before. The girls dropped beside each other on the couch.

"You're not going to be able to see over there," Alice said as I saw Bella visibly stiffen. "Come over here. There's room." Bella shuffled herself closer to Alice, giving me a wide berth on the end of the couch. She didn't argue though, as I crossed the room and sat near her. Bella still hadn't relaxed, but Alice appeared unaware of Bella's obvious discomfort as she pawed through a stack of DVDs on the table, deliberating.

"No more _Bring It O__n._" Bella stated.

Alice's lower lip shot out in a pout. "Come on, I thought we'd do them all today."

"No. Never. No."

"But…"

"Hell no," Bella cut her off.

I couldn't help the laugh that escaped me at the banter of the girls and the thought of Bella sitting there watching a cheerleading movie. When both girls' eyes quickly fell on me I attempted to cover my laughter with a cough.

"Do you have a suggestion, Edward?" Bella asked, her voice taunting.

"Um, no." I nearly squeaked under their scrutiny. I decided to keep my mouth shut while the girls debated. Alice kept making suggestions that Bella quickly shot down, and Alice was doing the same to Bella's. I was pretty sure they weren't going to come to an agreement at all.

"Ah, I got it," Alice shouted as she jumped up from the couch. Alice rifled through a collection of DVDs beside the television and finally held her prize over her head.

"Where the hell did that come from?" Bella asked.

"Charlie's obviously a Kate Hudson fan," Alice said smiling sweetly. "He's got just almost all of her movies." It was obvious that Bella had given up. She heaved a sigh as I settled back and Alice loaded the movie into the player. A AA side from occasional laughter, the three of us were quiet while watching the movie. And, I could be mistaken but, I'm pretty sure, I noticed Bella eyeing me when Matthew McConaughay took off his shirt.

When the movie ended, Alice hopped up from her seat on the couch. "Cupcakes, cupcakes, cupcakes," she sang as she skipped from the living room. "Come on," Alice hollered. "Bella, I _need_ frosting."

Bella's lips twitched, as if she were fighting a smile as she stood. "Al, don't fucking touch anything."

I followed Bella into the kitchen. Alice was sitting on the counter, spoon in hand, poking into a bowl. Bella quickly snatched the spoon from Alice's hand and set to work. Watching Bella in the kitchen was amazing. I knew, well I had been informed, that Bella cooked, but watching her was something else. She was sure of herself and moved with purpose and direction, which was a far cry from the broken little girl she'd been the day before.

Bella pulled plastic wrap off a tray full of pink cupcakes and scooped icing into a plastic bag, then started making perfect little swirls of icing.

"Sprinkles, Bella. Don't forget the sprinkles." Alice reminded me of a five-year-old a s she squealed with delight. I saw Bella roll her eyes, but it was obvious to me that her walls were down again when she laughed at her friend. It was a beautiful, fluid, musical sound that I wanted nothing more than to hear again and again.

Alice and I sat at the table, as she liberally applied sprinkles to the neatly iced cupcakes. I continued to watch Bella as she assembled something else into a pan. I was mesmerized by her, and only broke my gaze when something hit me between the eyes. I flicked the offending Red Hot back across the table where Alice sat with a knowing smirk. After Bella stuck the casserole dish in the oven, the three of us sat down with a plate of cupcakes, perfectly iced and topped with more sprinkles than was probably safe. I swear Bella was sitting closer to me now than before. Alice made another movie choice, and neither Bella nor I argued with her.

BELLA

"Hey, girls," Charlie said loudly as he came through the door. "Edward."

Edward sat up straighter on the couch when Charlie acknowledged him. My neck was suddenly chilled when he lifted his head from the back of the couch; his warm breath no longer gently blowing on me. I realized how close I had moved toward him, and was now acutely aware of the fact that our knees were pressed against each other.

"Um, hi, Chief." Then he added softly, "I should get going."

When he stood and said goodbye to Alice, I followed him to the porch. "Thanks for bringing my stuff by," I whispered. I was trying to look anywhere but his eyes. I remembered the softness in them yesterday, and was afraid it would be there today. I already wanted to touch him again, but I was afraid I wouldn't stop there. I was afraid I'd want to wrap myself up in him and tell him all my secrets. I was afraid I'd let him/ tell me it was okay, and that I would believe him. My gaze kept landing on his lips. I could not let myself kiss him again, but I wanted to, so badly. His tongue pushed past his lips, wetting them. I closed my eyes to steel my resolve. Edward seemed closer when I opened them again. "I didn't have a chance to wash your clothes yet," I blurted out.

Edward's eyebrows knit together and he rocked back on his heels a bit. He looked startled. "That's okay, you don't…"

"No," I interrupted. "I'll get it done this weekend and bring them to school Monday. Is that okay?" I didn't want to.

"Yeah, that's fine."

"Okay, well, bye." I turned quickly and walked back into the house. I wanted nothing more than to sit out there and have a cigarette. But I wasn't sure he'd leave and I had to get away from him. I had to get away from him, because there really was something I wanted more than a cigarette. I wanted to kiss him again.

I dropped myself back on to the couch across from Alice and pulled the blanket from the back of the couch over me. Edward had been sitting against it most of the afternoon. Alice was eyeing me with a slight smirk.

I huffed at her and tried to nonchalantly sniff the blanket to see if it smelled like Edward.

Alice's smirk transformed into a huge smile.

"What?" I groaned.

Still grinning like a madwoman, she shrugged at me. "You tell me."

"Where's Charlie?" I asked, looking around.

"Shower. Spill."

Sighing, I answered, "There's nothing to say."

"Yes, there is. He likes you, Bella," she practically sang.

I rolled my eyes at Alice's constant exuberance. "No."

"Yes he does," she drawled out. "He likes you," Alice continued in a sing song.

I stuck my tongue out at her.

"Don't waste that on me. You should go stick it down Edward's throat." The grin on Alice's face was from ear to ear and I couldn't help but smile back at her for a moment. "Oh my God, you already did!" she squealed.

My smile faded and I shook my head. "Even if he does, which he doesn't, it doesn't matter, Alice."

Her nose wrinkled up. "Why do you do this?"

"Do what?" I asked lazily.

"Insist on being miserable," she said pointedly.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"You can never just let yourself be happy. It's like you have this constant need to punish yourself. Even when you are _happy_, you do it the hard way. Like you find pleasure in things that just aren't going to work out."

"Fuck, Alice," I groaned. "Seriously, what the fuck are you talking about? Are you even trying to make sense?" The level of my voice was rising.

"Bella, I'm not trying to piss you off here. I'm just calling 'em like I see 'em, and it's shit I probably should have called you on a long time ago."

"Okay, Alice." I wasn't in the mood to argue with her.

The two of us stared at the television quietly. "Bella, tell me one thing," she whispered. I looked at her, eyebrows raised, waiting for her question. "Where'd you get that shirt you wore last night?"

It was a low fucking blow and she knew it.

"Alice," I warned.

She looked at me with grin bigger than the Cheshire Cat. "That's what I thought."

"Like I said, it doesn't matter, Alice," I whispered.

"Of course it does. You like him, he likes you. It matters."

"Whatever," I relented, not wanting to talk about this anymore.

Alice, being Alice though, wasn't letting it go that easily. "Bella, what's keeping you from trying it?"

"I'm not…" I fumbled, not knowing what to say. "Ready," I finished lamely, though that didn't quite cover it.

"Why? You're not hung up on _him_ and all that garbage?"

"That's not it..."

"I didn't think so. I mean, you're not wearing that awful thing around your neck anymore, but I had to make sure."

My hand flew up to my chest and ran over my clothing. "I'm not... huh."

**A/N- **The next couple of weeks are going to be crazy around here, I'm making a wedding cake (yikes!) on top of all the usual, so it may be a bit before I'm really able to work on this. I feel like I shouldn't ask for reviews because I've been so sucky about updates. But, I do appreciate them and they do motivate me to write. I'm not going to grovel but I am making sad puppy dog eyes as I type this.


	21. Chapter 21

A/N- I totally suck! It's been too long. I had a major block and just life in general- sorry.

Edward-

Under the guise of studying I had been holed up in my room since leaving Bella's house on Friday night. I guess it wasn't really a guise as what that should have taken me a few hours, actually took me most of the day Saturday. It wasn't because the material was more difficult than usual, I simply couldn't focus. Bella's lingering scent on my sheets was a distraction. I had tried staying away from the bed, but found myself drawn to it and the memories it brought to mind. If I were really determined, though, I would have changed the sheets. In honesty I had to admit I liked the thoughts they brought to mind.

Studying may have been my excuse and it's possible I was fueled by thoughts of Bella, but when it came down to it I was avoiding my family. There wasn't really a good reason for that. I doubted my parents had noticed anything amiss, but something definitely felt different for me. It was something I didn't understand and wasn't entirely ready to share, I guess.

I hadn't thought about the fact that my parents would be up already Sunday morning. A massive breakfast spread between the two of them. My father completely entranced by the pile of bacon and pancakes soaked in maple syrup, barely acknowledged me. While my mother hopped up to get me an empty plate, with a look of excitement on her face.

I was hungrier than I anticipated and was on my second helping of pancakes when my mom spoke. "Would you like to come to church with us, Edward?" She didn't look up from her plate when she asked, obviously expecting me to say no.

Hell, I expected to say no myself, but that's not what came out when I opened my mouth. "Sure," I mumbled through a mouthful of scrambled eggs. Both my parents looked at me like my hair was on fire but didn't say a word. I hadn't gone to church with my parents since we moved to Forks and it suddenly became optional. Emmett and I had attended a Catholic school back in Chicago and Sunday mass was a family affair. I was surprised when we didn't pull up in front of St. Anne's, the only Catholic parish in Forks.

"I thought we were Catholic." I muttered, mostly to myself as I climbed out of the vehicle.

"You're mother is," my father answered with a smile. As he spoke he quickly brushed past me, darting to open my mother's door. I watched as he extended his hand to help her from the car, though she didn't need his help. My mom placed her in the crook of my father's arm as he led her to the church. It was all very antiquated. I had never really thought much about it before, but my parents seemed to live by the words of Emily Post. Her original words. The ones she wrote in the 1920's.

After the service I followed my parents out of the church. They visited briefly with the pastor and his wife before, they meeting with some friends and colleagues on the small front lawn of the chuch. It was unseasonably warm, well just warm for Forks in general. Women were in sundresses and men in short sleeves. I stood aside while my parents talked, staring at the clear blue, cloudless sky for lack of anything better to do.

"Hey, Edward." A female voice pulled me from my thoughts.

Looking over, I answered, "Hey, Angela."

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"Um." I shrugged. "I came with my parents."

"Is this, like, a first?" she teased with an eyebrow arched.

I chuckled a little. "Yeah. I guess. What about you?"

"I'm here every week. Good daughter that I am." When my brow furrowed, she added, "My dad's the pastor." An answer my unspoken question.

I nodded slowly, "Oh, yeah. I guess I did know that."

The conversation felt somewhat stilted and awkward. While Angela was someone I would count as a friend, I realized we had never actually ever spent any one on one time together. Ben was always around.

"So, what are your plans for the rest of the day?" Angela asked after a few quiet moments.

"I didn't really have any, though it is beautiful out. I suppose I should try and enjoy that." I looked up at the sky again as I spoke.

"I know. It's supposed to be even warmer tomorrow. I think Ben and I are going to head over to the beach today. You should come along." Her mouth drew into a smirk. "You could bring someone along," she said in a sing song voice.

"Ha," I deadpanned. I knew full well where this conversation was about to go.

I was saved when her phone audibly buzzed from her purse. "That's probably Ben," she said as she pulled it out. "Should I tell him you're joining us? I could call some other_ people_."

I shook my head. Glancing around, I looked for my parents hoping to avoid a further invite to hang with Angela and Ben today. Since the party, and the incident with Rosalie, I'd noticed that Bella and Angela had been hanging out together. Ben seemed to think this was great. Lately, he'd spent a lot of time talking about double dates. The two of them were as obsessed with the idea of Bella and me as I was, except I didn't want to talk about it. "See you tomorrow," I mouthed to her when I saw my chance to make my getaway. My parents were across the lawn, talking with Chief Swan and a woman dark haired woman, I didn't recognize. When Angela nodded in response, I made my way over to the others. As I approached the conversation stopped and Chief Swan smiled when he spotted me.

"Edward," he said, extending his hand to me.

I noticed my father lift an eyebrow in question of the familiar greeting. Fixing my gaze on my shoes, I quickly shook the chief's hand.

"I noticed you didn't stop by yesterday. Alice too much for ya?"

"Uh, um..." I stammered.

"She can be a bit much. But, Bella has really enjoyed having her around for the weekend," he continued softly.

"Yeah, I can see that," I mumbled without making eye contact.

My father cleared his throat. "Well, we should probably be going."

Goodbyes were made and I followed my parents back to the car. I wanted to run back into the church really quick and pray that my parents wouldn't ask about what Chief Swan had said. Seemed I should have a bit an in with the big guy upstairs, since I'd sat through a service earlier. _Please, God. I know it's been a long time, but really, I don't ask for much._

Once we had pulled out of the parking lot, my mom turned down the radio. I knew my prayers were not about to be answered. "You've been spending time with Bella?" Mom asked.

"Yeah, I guess. I gave her a ride and Chief Swan invited me over for dinner..."

"You had dinner with her and her father," she interrupted.

"Um, yeah. It wa..."

"When was this? Why didn't you tell me?" This reaction was exactly why I hadn't told my mother about what was or wasn't going on between Bella and I. She was about to pull out one of her Emily Post rules of etiquette. I'm sure she had a numbered list somewhere. #138 If an invitation was extended to you, you had a window of time in which to reciprocate. I didn't know what that window was, but she did. "We'll have to have her over. Soon."

"Mom," I sighed. "We don't have to."

It was too late though, she was already planning and derailing her plans was nearly impossible. "Oh, we could have Rosalie over as well and make a real evening of it," she gushed from the front seat.

"I don't really think that's a good idea."

"Of course it is," she said, in an admonishing voice.

I scrubbed my hand over my face. "Bella and Rosalie don't really get along." Understatement of the year. "And, Bella and I aren't, there's nothing really... I mean, I don't even know that she'd come."

"Nonsense, Edward. Of course she'll come. You're a wonderful, handsome young man. How could she resist?" She smiled over he shoulder at me then turned to my father, "She was just over the other day, you know. Though, they snuck in."

"Mom," I groaned.

My dad caught my eye in the rear view mirror and gave me sympathetic look. "Esme, perhaps we should hold off on any dinner parties. I doubt Emmett could fit it into his schedule during football season." He reached over and turned the radio up a bit, in what was probably an attempt to end the conversation.

"Fine," my mother huffed slightly. "But, we'll still need to have Bella over. Didn't you ask her to stay for dinner the other night? I told Emmett, to tell you, to ask her to stay."

"She had stuff going on." I groaned again, "Mom, can we please not do this now?"

"Just promise me you'll invite her to dinner. It could be just the three of us," she pleaded.

"Okay," I relented, but I didn't say when.

I spent the rest of the day holed up in my room, deliberately avoiding my mom who without a doubt would want to talk more about Bella and dinner plans.

~~~00~~~

Monday morning, I arrived at school early for a meeting with Mr. Banner about peer tutoring. I took a seat next to Angela who had also signed up to tutor. Several students were gathered in the room and we all were given a run down of how the program would work. After letting us know that it was up to each pair of students to mutually agree on a time to work together he passed out tutoring assignments.

Most of the students immediately paired up with their partner to work out a time to get together.

Angela groaned quietly beside me. "I got Tyler Crowley, for English and Algebra. This should be fun. Why did I sign up for this again?" she whispered.

"It'll look good on your college application," I answered her.

Rolling her eyes she answered, "It better."

I was laughing lightly at her when Mr. Banner placed my assignment on the desk in front of me.

"Who'd you get?" she asked. I picked up the paper as she looked over at it. A huge smile crept across her face. "Aww, lucky you."

I shook my head and pinched at the bridge of my nose. I couldn't believe the name. While my heart started to race a bit, I was trying to keep any excitement from my face. Isabella Swan. It was imposed time with Bella, time we would have to be together. Mr. Banner had said it himself. At least one hour per week. We had to sign a logbook weekly stating we had done just that. When Angela walked across the room to talk with Tyler, I looked down my sheet to see what subjects Bella needed help with; Trig and Bio? I hopped out of my seat and headed to the front of the room.

"Mr. Banner?" I called, as I approached his desk.

"Edward, I know Bella's not here right now. You two can get together later and schedule something."

"Yeah, okay. But..."

"I figured this would work well. Biology is one of the subjects she needs help in and since you are lab partners, it will probably would benefit both of you. Gives you more time to work together and if she's understanding things better you aren't having to carry her as much though the labs."

His logic made sense but I didn't understand how Bella could need help in Biology. I had done a couple labs with her already and she carried her own weight just fine.

"I'll let Bella know when she gets to class today. So, you don't have to try and track her down on your own."

"Um, okay," I managed to mumble as the bell rang. I didn't understand how Bella could really need tutoring in Biology, but I wasn't going to argue it was still time I'd get to spend with her.

BELLA

The three of us were sitting in the same seats on Charlie's couch. This had to have been Alice's doing. Because as much as I might have wanted to there was no way I would invite Edward Cullen into my house again. Edward Cullen. Even thinking his name caused a reaction and right now we were close enough I could feel the heat of his body. I shifted, careful not to let my body come in contact with his.

The television was off, but I didn't care I was so focused on the whatever it was flowing between Edward and me. There was something there. Something I could feel. I kept glancing through my peripheral, wondering if it was something I could see as well. I wondered if it was something Edward was aware of, but he gave no indication that it was. My concentration was so centered on Edward I almost missed Alice's murmuring beside me. Almost, but she was obviously getting frustrated because she was getting louder. I couldn't understand what she was saying though. I looked over at her, her lips were moving way too fast.

"Shh, Alice," I whispered at her, hoping to calm her.

I was finally starting to catch a few of the words flying from Alice's mouth. "Bella, come on...Go..."

As Alice got louder and made more sense, the air began to cool to my other side and the energy between Edward and I seemed to lessen.

I didn't want it to.

I wanted to turn to him and touch him. I wanted just give in to whatever it was that always felt like it was drawing me to him. But Alice wasn't going to let me. I shushed at her again, "Shh, Alice. Stop." Alice wasn't going to quit though, now she was pulling on my arm. I tried to turn towards Edward, but he wasn't there anymore.

I groaned in disgust as Alice began to make sense. "Bella, I have to go. Wake up."

Stretching and letting out another groan, I forced my eyes open. Alice was already showered and dressed, waking me up to say goodbye before Charlie drove her to the airport.

"So, what were you dreaming about?" Alice grinned at me. She was far to perky for this hour. The giggle she let out gave me the impression that she had some ideas about the answer to her question.

"What did I say?" I mumbled in my half awake state.

She giggled again in response. I couldn't understand why the hell was she so happy, she was leaving and I didn't know when I would see her again. I dragged myself out of bed to see her off. After several hugs and a few tears at the door, Alice was gone and I was back to my real life. It was too early to think about school, but my brain was too busy to let me go back to sleep. After laying in bed staring at the ceiling for a while I gave up. I found myself I sitting in Charlie's favorite chair and staring into nothingness.

I don't know how long I sat there when something broke through my haze. I huffed as my phone buzzed on the coffee table. There was only one person who would think this was an appropriate hour to call.

"Hey, M..."

I didn't even get through my greeting before my mother launched herself into conversation. "It's not too early to call is it? You're up? Of course you're up, you answered the phone. How was your visit with Alice?"

"It was good, Mom. Thanks."

"I'm glad it was good. Sorry I didn't call earlier to check. I tried calling to wish you a happy birthday. You got my messages, didn't you?"

"Yeah, Mom. Sorry I didn't call back, I was busy."

"With Alice, I know. It's okay. We're okay now, right? I know I upset you, but I just... it seem to be the best thing, Bella. It's hard being a parent, to know what's the right thing."

"We're okay," I answered softly.

"Well I have some news," she exclaimed excitedly.

"You're pregnant?" I hedged.

"Ha, Bella. No." I could almost hear her eyes rolling.

"It could happen, you know?" I teased.

"Yes, I'm fully aware of how that works. Are you?"

"Yes, Mom," I groaned, sorry I'd started this line of conversation. "So, what's your news?"

"Bella, you're being safe, right?" She was apparently going to have a 'mom' moment.

"Mom," I squeaked. "You sent me to a town where I know no one. I'm being very safe. I'm not having sex."

"Good."

I buried my face in my free hand, she would think that is good. "Your news?" I asked again, attempting to get the conversation back on track.

"Phil got a transfer to another team. It's actually up a league," she answered excitedly. "I didn't get a chance to call this weekend because we were looking for a new place."

"What kind of place?" I drawled out my question.

My mom laughed lightly. "A place to live."

"What's wrong with our house?" I asked dumbly.

"Well, for starters, it's not in Florida." I froze. "The transfer is to a team in Florida, one step down from the majors. It's a pretty big deal. So, Phil and I figured, rather than him spend his spring and summer without us, or me doing all that traveling... we'd just move. Really, there's nothing holding us in Phoenix."

"Florida," I repeated softly.

"I've already got a lead on a job. And, we found a really cute little house to rent. It has a pool and it's just a few miles from the beach. Your room even opens right out on the patio," my mom gushed.

"Florida?" I was still trying to wrap my head around the information.

"Jacksonville," she answered, then added softly, "You'll love it, Bella. You really will."

"Uh..." I couldn't come up with a response that didn't involve me screaming 'What the fuck?' at the top of my lungs.

"It's such a great opportunity. For all of us. Of course for Phil, but it also gives us all a fresh start. Seems like something we could all use about now."

My teeth were sinking painfully into my lower lip. "Um... Mom, I should get going. I have to get ready for school." I couldn't talk about this anymore.

"Okay, hon. We'll talk later?"

"Yeah. Okay, Mom. Bye."

I couldn't end the call fast enough. Had everyone completely lost their minds. I didn't want to move to Florida. Hell, I didn't want to move to Forks, but no one asked my opinions about anything. I couldn't wait until I could make some decisions for myself. Resting my chin on my hands, I didn't know what to think. It had just started and this was turning out to be a really fucked up day.

~~00~~

I was probably being ridiculous. Not probably. I was being ridiculous, but, I just needed that powerful feeling that a really hot outfit gives you. Because I was feeling completely powerless. Being that it was unseasonably warm, I was able to pull out some of my things I wore all the time in Phoenix. After tearing apart my room I settled on a spaghetti strap sun dress. It had a plunging neckline and a skirt that was far too short for school, but the colorful zigzag pattern made it casual. I also found a pair of strappy heeled sandals that I could barely walk in safely. Pulling my hair into a high pony, I was sure this was the perfect deflection. It was an outfit that would draw everyone's attention, but intimidate them enough that they'd stay away. I didn't care if they were talking behind my back. I knew they were. That didn't matter, as long as they weren't talking to me.

The first thing I saw when I pulled into the school's parking lot was that damn, shiny, silver Volvo. I may have felt sexy as hell when I left the house, but the sight of that car left me feeling all jumbled up and confused. I intentionally parked on the other side of the lot. It didn't matter what Alice had said, or even what I might feel. I couldn't involve myself with Edward. I wasn't any good for him. He deserved so much more than me. I headed to the main office, to ask about the tutoring Charlie was so set on. The secretary's eyes ran over me and lips pursed in disapproval, but she said nothing. I couldn't help but smile, that was the reaction I was going for.

"I'm supposed to ask about some tutoring thing."

She raised an eyebrow and smirked slightly, a look that said _'of course you do'._ "You'll need to see Mr. Banner. He's probably in his classroom," she said with a haughty grin.

With a huge sigh, I turned and walked out the door. Checking my phone for the time, I rushed to the science building to try and catch Mr. Banner before first period.

"Mr. Banner," I said softly as I approached his desk.

"Bella, your a little late," he answered. I glanced around the room in confusion, as he shuffled some papers on his desk. "This it the basic information, if you have any questions let me know. The logbook for hours will be kept in that cabinet." He gestured to a large cabinet in one corner of the room and handed me a sheet of paper. I continued to stare at him like a deer in headlights, he obviously had me confused with someone else. "Anything you want to ask?"

"Um..." I looked down at the sheet he'd given me. It read 'Peer Tutoring Program' across the top. "How did you know I was here for tutoring?"

"Your father called to sign you up on Friday."

In a split second I went from confused to belligerent. "What?" I screeched. Mr. Banner looked at me as if I'd grown another head. I drew in a deep breath and whipped around, pulling my phone from my pocket as I left the room.

It took four rings for Charlie to pick up. Four rings too many.

"Why did you tell me to sign up for this tutoring thing and make it this big fucking deal, if you were just going to sign me up yourself," I ranted in the phone, before he could even say hello.

"Oh."

"Oh? That's it. Oh?"

"First off Bella, you need to calm down. I wasn't trying to be sneaky, or do anything behind your back. I just forgot," he said in a voice that made it impossible for me to respond. I rolled my eyes involuntarily and was kind of glad he couldn't see it. "Mark called me to ask if you we're going to do it on Friday, apparently that was the last day to sign up. So I said yes. I forgot to tell you. I'm not going to apologize and you need to check your tone before you say anything else."

"Fine," I said, curtly.

"Alright. I got Alice off okay and now, if you're over your little tantrum, I'm gonna get back on the road. I'll see you this afternoon." With that Charlie ended the call, not even waiting for me to say bye. I stood there in shock. He had pulled the Dad Card on me again, that was seriously going to take some getting used to. I threw my phone into my backpack and contemplated getting in my truck and getting out of there. As the bell rang for first period, though, I turned back to the school; I had no where else to go.


End file.
